MH #40
What happened inside that banquet hall, was the happiest moment in my life—getting to marry a star I thought was far out of my reach.
During our wedding ceremony, Ethan was just looking at me. Our eyes were distant from each other, but the more I stare at his, the more we reach each other’s grasp.
Alala ko pa rin ang mga ngiti niya sa araw na ‘yon. They were all genuine. Ang mga ngiting iyon, naalala kong ‘yon ang mga ngiting kinakapitan ko noon, para hindi ako matumba sa paglalakad ko. Yung mga ngiting iyon ang nagsilbing gasolina ko. Siya yung palaging nandiyan para sa akin. It was just those times, I fail to recognize the romance growing between the two of us.
As he lifted my chin up, he moved his face closer towards mine, just so our lips could meet. It was a like a matter of seconds, I lost myself in oblivion. I did not manage to move my own lips, while he was like appealing me to dance with his. It was just me and him that time; that was what I thought. And so when he was about to withdraw his lips from mine, I suddenly held his cheeks and pulled him even closer.
Sinagot ko siya ng halik. At simula sa araw na ‘yon, we made a vow to stay together.
“What are you thinking?”
I heard his husky voice from my back, circling his arms around my waist; his chin placed above my right shoulder.
“Ikaw lang iniisip ko,” sabi ko sa kaniya’t tiningnan siya sa mga mata habang nanatili pa rin kami sa aming posisyon. “Did you see that horizon where the sun was about to leave the world again with darkness? Alam mo bang ikaw yung horizon ko?”
“Stop it, you’re making me blush,” he said and bubbled his cheeks.
“Ikaw yung horizon ko’t ako naman yung araw. Kapag tapos na ang isang nakakapagod kong araw, alam ko na kung saan ako magpapahinga.”
“Saan?”
“Sa’yo.”
“Who would’ve thought I’d marry a woman as beautiful as you are? It makes my heart flutter every time I see your face. Naiinis ako, kasi hindi ko magawang magalit sa’yo nang matagal.”
Inalis ko ang mga braso niyang nakapulupot sa aking baywang. Naisipan kong umupo sa puting buhangin. Sinundan naman niya ako ng upo, pero niyakap niya pa rin ako mula sa likuran, and he trapped me in between his spread legs.
“Gusto kong ganito na lang tayo palagi,” bulong niya sa akin habang pareho pa rin kaming nakatingin sa papalubog na araw. “Gusto kong kahit magpahinga ka’t matutulog, gigising ka pa rin sa umaga para balikan ang mga alaalang ito.”
I turned my head to the side, in order to meet his eyes. It was lustrous and daunting in a good way. “Ethan, manonood na lang kaya tayo ng KDrama? Ano? Balik na tayo sa resort?”
“Pagkatapos lumubog ng araw. I don’t want to leave my sun still awake, you know? I have to wait for her to finally plunge in her dreams with me.”
There were twists happening inside my stomach when he said that. Napatingin ako sa paligid at mukhang kami na lang yung natirang tao sa lugar, habang dinaramdam ang malamig na yakap ng hangin. At ang lamig na 'yon ay kinokontra naman ng nag-iinit naming katawan.
The warmth felt so safe. I felt safe. Finally, I had been waiting for this to happen—to actually have someone to wipe away my tears whenever I’m crooked, to transform my grief into utter bliss, to hug me this tight every single day, and to caress my hair whenever I want to rest.
He was this someone, who filled the empty seat beside me. He was this someone who accompanied a lonely and howling vixen, a female wolf, trapped inside what seemed to be an infinite darkness.
Nang dahil sa kaniya, natuto akong magsimula ulit. Nagbago ang isip kong hindi lahat ng tao’y pare-pareho ang pagtingin sa akin. Maaaring iilan lang ang makakaintindi—but it was far enough from having no one to understand you.
People, who don’t invalidate the idea of pain inside you, are the best to keep in your treasure dungeon—shining like bright stars in the middle of a dark forest, yes, they are.
At ang mas maganda, may isang bumaba para samahan ako.
It was him. Ethan.
I tightened my hold to his clasped hands on my abdomen. “Ethan, gabi na. Lumubog na yung araw. Manood na tayo?”
“Ano ba panonoorin natin? Porn?”
“Gago,” natatawa kong giit. “Palagi na lang ‘yan iniisip mo. Palagi ka bang nanonood ng ganiyan?”
“Bakit? Gusto mo live? I’d gladly do it for you, para naman mapasaya kita sa honeymoon natin.”
“Masaya ba ‘yon? Sira ka talaga,” I retorted, twitching the side of my lips. “Hindi ka ba makahin—hoy!”
He carried me bridal style all of a sudden, while he was smiling, wearing his white hat and a slightly open button-down polo, revealing his chest to me. Napalunok na lang ako ng laway.
“Ang gaan mo na. Mukhang successful yung exercise natin kada-gabi, a.”
“Sira ka! Anong exercise ang sinasabi mo diyan?”
“I’m sorry. I just can’t wait to make love with you, kaya siguro ako ganito ngayon, pero hayaan mo. Isang beses lang naman.”
“Ang honest mo, gago.”
“We’re couples now. I should be open to you about everything, even my darkest desires.”
Hanggang sasakyan ay karga-karga niya pa rin ako. Kagaya ng palagi niyang ginagawa. Pinaupo niya muna ako’t sinuotan ng seatbelt bago pumunta sa kaniyang puwesto sa driver’s seat. Silently, we drove our way back to the resort where we were both staying together.
Nang makabalik na kami sa aming kuwarto, Ethan immediately set up the smart tv in front of the huge bed, huge to the point that it could be occupied by three people for a sleep.
After choosing a drama, Ethan went near the bed. Humiga na rin siya’t tinabihan ako. I moved to press my cheeks against his dominative chest, while he was embracing me with his arms.
“Ethan, what’s the purpose of honeymoon?” tanong ko sa kaniya, habang nagsisimula pa ang pangalawang episode ng drama. “I mean, bakit may pa-honey moon yung mga bagong kasal?”
“Gusto mong malaman?”
“Kaya nga tinanong ko, ‘di ba?”
Nagulat na lang ako nang patayin niya ang smart tv at pumaibabaw siya sa akin sa kama. Napalunok ako ng laway. Tiningnan niya ako habang nakangisi sa akin. He then licked his lower lip, as if he was telling me we must do something tonight.
“A-Anong g-gagawin mo?” nauutal kong tanong.
“Gusto mong malaman, ‘di ba?” sabi niya; medyo garalgal na yung boses. “Ito yung sagot ko,” kaniyang dagdag at hinagod ako ng halik.
BINABASA MO ANG
Metallic Hearts
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