Raw Love

Good Guy

Kayla's POV

When I got home I barely made it through the front door before I started crying my eyes out. I cried loud and hard and all the way up to my room. I wanted to throw something, I wanted to hit something, I wanted to hurt someone. I was hurting, my heart was hurting, my chest was hurting and my throat was hurting. I screamed three times because I was so angry. 

I probably cried for a few hours before I ran out of tears. I sat there laying on my bed for another 2 hours before I decided to get up and go to the bathroom. I turned the light on and looked in the mirror. My face was puffy all around my eyes which were red and my nose was red too. I looked a mess but I didn't even care because I was hurting. 

I wanted Mike to work out, I really did, just like I wanted my ex and I to work out too but that didn't either. I don't know what I did wrong in either case. I don't know if it's me or the niggas. I don't do anything, I don't cheat, I don't lie. I thought I did good with picking niggas but they all end up doing me dirty. Niggas ain't shit for real and it honestly hurts. I have yet to find a good nigga and I don't want to be alone. 

And this whole time I have been crying, Brandi hasn't even come in to check on me yet. I wasn't crying quietly, she heard me, she just doesn't care. Even Warren came in and said "what's wrong Kay Kay". I pushed him out but that's only because I didn't want to take my anger out on him and I was annoyed already.

Deja and Alana have been texting me and trying to call or FaceTime me this whole time but I haven't been able to reply to them. 

*Kayla please tell me you are ok*, Deja sent.

*Kayla answer my ft I wanna know you are ok*, Alana sent.

I have at least 47 missed Facetimes from them combined. I decide that I will just FaceTime them both at the same time.

"Kayla oh my gosh", Deja says when she answers.

"We didn't even know if you made it home", Alana says.

"We had to check your location to know you even made it", Deja says.

"How you feeling baby", she adds.

"Numb", I say.

"Was you crying this whole time", Deja asks.

"Yes", I say. My throat is a little dry and my voice is a little hoarse. I get up to go get something to drink from the kitchen.

"Kayla no", Alana says, "how are you now".

"I don't know", I say and get the 2-liter from the fridge.

"Are you still mad", Deja asks. I open it and take a few deep gulps before I answer.

"I'm mad, I'm sad, I'm angry, I'm hurt", I say.

"I know and you have every right to be he was so wrong in that but Kayla please don't let this keep you down because you was the best thing to happen to him and now he lost it, he lost you", Deja says.

"Exactly, you didn't need him, he needed you Kayla", Alana says.

"Yea", I say and put the soda back. I think about getting some food but I am not even hungry, I have no appetite.

"I will kick his ass Kayla 'cause I don't appreciate how is bitch ass got you crying like that", Deja says.

"No", I say.

"I am serious because I been knew he was iffy from the start", she says.

"I don't care anymore, I just dont", I say.

"I know I am sorry I won't talk about it", she says.

"I really just don't know what is wrong with me", I say and my eyes start to water again.