Same Old Love / Noah & Elle Fanfiction

Chapter Five

It takes me a while to find the will to get up and join Noah in the living room this morning. I hate to think that in just a few hours Noah will be on a date with some girl. I've never really been one to be jealous, but the more that I think about Noah with someone that isn't me, the worse I feel. I spend as much time as I possibly can just laying in bed, but I know that eventually, I have to get up and face Noah.

When I do finally pull myself out of bed, I try not to make it awkward with Noah. Which appears to be easier said than done. The atmosphere of the room is awkward and strained like both of us want to break the silence but neither of us actually can. I end up flipping through the channels on the TV for most of the day while Noah sits on the couch across from me alternating between scrolling through his phone and reading an old Goosebumps book that must have been left here years ago.

I start to wonder if Noah is mad at me for my reaction to the news of his date. It's not like Noah to read or just sit around in silence, so it makes me nervous. I try to distract myself by continuing to focus on the show that I decided on but it's no use. I lose focus again when Noah gets up to get ready for his date. So many thoughts are swirling through my head, as I try to get rid of the jealousy that has sprung through me again. Noah had mentioned earlier that he told his date to meet him at the restaurant because "it's just easier that way" but I can't help but think that he knows how I'm feeling, and did it for my benefit. I obviously haven't been good at hiding my emotions about this, but I'm just shocked and I don't know how to get rid of that.

I watch as Noah appears out of his bedroom again, dressed in khakis and a white button-up shirt that isn't quite buttoned all the way. He looks good. Really good. He travels around the house looking for his wallet and keys, and when he finally finds them he turns to me and says,

"Will you be okay for dinner or should I bring you something home?"

"Oh, no, I can just make myself something," I say, and Noah smiles, nods, and twirls his keys around his fingers.

"Well," he sighs, "I'm going to get going."

I flash Noah a fake smile. "Have fun!"

* * *

I putter around the house for a bit after Noah leaves. I clean anything in sight that is even remotely dirty, in an attempt to keep myself busy. I try not to let my mind wander to how Noah's date is going or if he's having a good time, but after cleaning everything possible, I can't help it. I'm tired of driving myself insane over Noah Flynn. It seems so dumb to me that just a little over two years ago, I would be at Lee's, swimming in their pool or doing homework and my relationship with Noah wasn't even an idea.

Sometimes, especially after Noah and I broke up, I'd wish that I never broke Lee and I's stupid rule. Although I love Noah, and I loved being his girlfriend, I also gave up things ever being the way they were. Lee tried to warn me, and that made it so much worse. I felt like dating Noah was a good idea, and I followed my heart but I risked a lot, and I'm still mad at myself for that.

After sitting for a while, I decide to clean out the kitchen cupboards and organize them. I start with the ones on the far left of the kitchen, making my way around, putting non perishables in one cupboard, and junk food in another. I assign a cupboard for spices, and then baking items, but then I come across a cupboard filled with bottles of wine. For a second I debate just throwing them out, thinking that they were probably left here one summer, but when I check the expiry on them, I realize that they must have been bought when Noah got here. I check some of the drawers for a corkscrew, and when I finally find one I pull down the glasses from one of the cupboards. It's not a wine glass, but it is going to have to do. I unscrew the top of the bottle and pour a good amount into the glass. I bring the glass to my lips and take a long sip, letting go of the anxieties I was having about Noah and his date just moments ago.