𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐧 𝐛𝐞𝐧𝐧𝐲 | 𝐛. 𝐫𝐨𝐝𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐞𝐳

𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐲 - 𝐭𝐰𝐨 | 𝐛𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐧

      MY SHOULDER THROBS AS I WARM UP WITH MY BAT. The scent of Pine Tar from Turner's bat carries in the wind and fills my nostrils. A large brownish-black streak wipes from his left shoulder down to his middle back, the typical area where his bat swings up an over his shoulder he warms up. I swing the bat in my hand, exhaling sharply. I return to my positing, practicing the swing again. Anger fills my veins, every swing projecting rage out of me and back into the air.
      "Hey, Rodriguez, what's going on? I've never seen you so angry before." Cal says, approaching me.
"Cal, you'd better back up." I warn, prepping another swing.
      "What happened, Benny?" He asks, growing closer.
"I said Back the Hell up, Cal!" I exclaim, spinning to look at him.
      His eyes are open wide as he stares at me. He nods and walks away, grabbing his glove.
"Benny, What the Hell has gotten into you?" Daniel asks.
      I exhale, shaking my head. I chomp down on the gum in my mouth, warming up again.
      "Go change out," He says, eyebrows furrowed, angry with me.
      I spin back around to look at him, an eyebrow raised.
      "What?" I ask. "No, no, this is a big game, Coach. This game, if we win it, we take first place. We lead the NL."
      He nods, crossing his arm over his chest. He purses his lips together and exhales slowly.
      "I know what this game means to us, Benny, but I cannot allow you to take your personal issues out on your fellow teammates." He says.
"I won't, I'm fine, honest. Please, this is the only thing I've got left. You've gotta let me play." I say.
      He exhales and bites his lip, chewing on a crack in his lip.
"Benny, we need you to bat tonight. But, I can't put your mental health at expense for this game. If there's something going on, you need to tell me." He says. "I want you to bat, but you have to tell me what's going on first."
I look back towards the dugout. Lennon is missing, and so too is the Roster board. I look back at him, exhaling.
"Lennon came and visited me last week. We tried to talk and things quickly went sour. Anything I had with Lennon quickly went downhill last night. I'm not sure where we stand anymore." I say.
      He twists his mouth into a tight frown, nodding slowly.
"Thank you. I understand that you're angry, and I'm going to permit you to bat today, but you have another outburst like that again and you're done for the day, hear me?" He asks.
I nod, exhaling sharply. I remove my batting gloves and approach the dugout.
      "I've gotta go speak with Smalls, check on how that roster is coming." I say. "I'll be back in a little bit."
I walk to the stairs from the Dugout, climbing them. I step into the main hall, exhaling as I spot fans starting to mingle in the halls. I tip my hat and hang my head low, smiling to a few fans who notice me. I use the elevator and step inside, exhaling with relief when the doors close and I'm out of sight. The elevator rises slowly, reaching the floor where Smalls' office resides. The doors open and I stand up straight from my spot where I lean against the wall. I walk through the hall, turning to approach his office. The door is closed slightly and I can hear a conversation behind the oak-wood door.
"Smalls, how am I supposed to talk things out with him if neither of us can even get a word out edge wise? I mean, I'm pretty sure he hates me. And the Benny I know now... He looks and sounds like the Benny I used to know, but he isn't him. It's like I don't even know who he is anymore."
"You don't, Lennon. You have to understand that when you left, a piece of Benny left with you. And, we were all pretty optimistic that when you would return three days later, that piece would return too. When you didn't come back and Benny never received a call or a letter or anything from you explaining what had happened, that piece that we had hoped would return shriveled up and died. The Benny you know now is only a shell of who he once was. And now that you're back, that piece of Benny is back too, alive and thriving. But, it's trying to fit in with the rest of him, and doesn't know where to start. You have to give him time. You have to let him come talk to you. I'm sure that you're hurt too, but Benny never got an explanation. He spent two weeks at the airport, waiting for you. He gave you the benefit of the doubt and thought that maybe your flight had been delayed, and so he sat and waited for you. By the end of the third week of waiting, Benny had been drafted for the Quakes and left. You have to give him time."
I knock on the door twice and push it open. Lennon sits at the oak table and stands, grabbing the Roster board.
"Oh, hey, sorry. I can come back later." I say, turning to leave.
Lennon shakes her head, approaching the door to leave.
"No, I was just leaving. He's all yours. Thanks Smalls." Lennon says and brushes past me.
I step into his office, an eyebrow raised. He puts away his roster folder and spins back around, looking at me.
"What was that all about?" I ask, pointing my thumb in the direction that Lennon left in.
He raises an eyebrow and adjusts his shirt sleeve cuff, then fixes his hat.
"What was what about?" He asks, shaking his head.
"I heard some of the conversation, Smalls. I was in the hall." I say, leaning against the table. "What was that about?"
Smalls exhales and leans back in his swiveling chair.
"A lot has happened Benny. And as much as I want you two to get back together, you're tearing each other apart. This needs to stop. Either build up the gumption to talk to her about it, or let it go. But please, for crying out loud, make up your mind!" He says. "I have a job other than to be your personal therapist. I live the company, don't get me wrong, but I'd prefer you come to me to talk strategy or games or plan a barbecue, anything except talk about your confusing love life."
I raise an eyebrow and smile slightly, watching him as he exhales.
"You done?" I ask, crossing my arms over my chest.
He nods, smiling at me with a wide, ear-to-ear grin.
"Yeah, sorry. I've just never spoken to anyone that way. I've always kinda kept my mouth shut and listened to everyone else. It felt good to speak my mind." He says.