Gone With The Wind ✔️

eight

Elizabeth

18 days left..

"Yes I am."

"There's nothing to be worried about. I am taking my meds."

"J-just...just let me live my last days.."

I released a deep breathe as I throw my phone in the center of the bed. Dr. Frida just called and she asked and scolded me because I wasn't able to pick her calls and reply to her messages yesterday. I didn't noticed those either because I am having fun with Wallace.

Yes, his name is Wallace. In the middle of having a long chat about random things, he suddenly opened about us being a strangers like c'mon, we've been spending days like we have already knew each other for years.

And one thing, he's confused if anong pangalan daw ang dapat niyang ilagay sa number ko doon sa contacts niya. I smile showed in my lips as I remembered how shy he was while asking for my name last night. He turned into a bit red and he can't look straight at me. He keeps on scratching his bridge too while being hesitant to ask me.

Honestly, for me it isn't a big deal to know each other's names because yeah like what I have said, this won't last long. Tomorrow may be the last, or today, or the next day. I don't know what day all of these will stop but I am certain it will.

The door suddenly rang. My brows met because I am not expecting any visitor today. I stood up and glanced at myself in the mirror for a second, to see if I don't look horrible.

As I surveyed at my physical appearance, hindi ko maitanggi na mas lalong namayat ako. I don't know why because I'm eating quite a lot these past few days but I'm getting more thin.

I was about to take steps through the door when chest pain attacks in a sudden together with abdominal pain. I started having a dry cough too and it leads me to have a trouble in breathing.

Despite the circumstance, I rushed to the table beside my bed, and took out my medicines from the drawer. Agad ko din naman itong ininom. The door keeps on ringing and even if I want to speak I can't because I am still coughing so hard. Pakiramdam ko parang mapupunit na ang lalamunan ko.

I leaned on the wall and tried to stop my cough by inhaling and exhaling several times. The pain are gradually fading at medyo nakahinga na ako ng maluwag doon. When I am finally able to walk properly, I fixed myself again and released a deep breath, because my chest is pounding too fast.

"Hey.."

I saw Wallace wearing a simple shirt and shorts. He's currently holding paper bags of something. He's smiling while raising what he's with and then the Jollibee logo became apparent.

"Jollibee." Masaya nitong sabi. I tried to give out a real smile.

"I'm sorry if I took to long to open the door. Galing kasi akong banyo." I lied. I opened the door widely so he can make his way inside.

"Pasok ka." Alok ko. Tumango naman siya't pumasok kaagad. Napahawak ako sa aking tiyan ng nagsisimula na namang sumakit ito.

Not today please..

"Pasensya talaga't natagalan ako sa pagbukas." I apologized again.

"It's no big deal. It's fine." He assured and smiled at me.

He roamed his eyes around the room as he placed the foods above the rounded table not far from the bed. The curtains were pulled back so we can see clearly the huge buildings and the clear skies.

The zephyr is so good today. People can freely break free and chill.

"Kumain ka na ba?"

Muling nabalik ang atensyon ko sa kaniya. I smiled as I shook my head. I was about to order food since mamayang gabi ko pa sanang gustong umalis dahil narinig kong may meteor shower daw mamayang gabi.

"Sakto at bumili ako ng pagkain. They're quite a lot but I bet we can finish all of these." He laughed and stood up to get the foods outside the bags.

I jokingly rolled my eyes on him as I started helping him too. I noticed some CDs beside those bags and my curiosity won't stop banging.

"What are those CDs for?" I asked while licking my finger because it was accidentally dipped in the gravy while I was taking it out.

"We'll have a movie marathon."

"Here?"

"Here."

I stared at him with amusement as I rested my palm on the table.

"Wow, you're full of plans. Time will never be wasted." I joked and laughed. Tumawa din naman siya't nagtaas-baba ng kilay habang tinatabi ang mga supot.

"What if we'll eat at the floor?" I suggested. Mas maganda kasi dahil tapat sa tv at makakapanood kami ng maayos.

I am actually not expecting this today because yesterday we haven't talked or agreed about doing something today that's why I am surprised he's here. Nagdala pa talaga ng pagkain.

"Akala ko yung sahig kakainin na'tin." Asar niya kaya agad ko siyang nasapak sa braso niya.

"Wow malakas!" Puna pa niya. Inirapan ko na lang siya't tinulungan ibaba ang mga pagkain.

"May meteor shower daw mamayang gabi? I just heard a staff said it." I asked while accessing the t.v.

"I hear about it too. Do you want--"

"Let's watch!" I excitedly cut.

"Sure. If that makes you happy."

* * *

I let out a bitter smile as I wipe my tears developing a blurry vision. I and him are currently watching a heart-rending movie, I forgot what's the title but the story is all about romance, but unfortunately, the boy has to go. With the wind.

You know what I mean? Yes, dying.

"In your perspective, which is more difficult and painful? Leaving or being left?"

I glanced at him and he's already looking at me. I gave a bitter smile as look back again at the screen.

Because if I was in the case, I guess being left is more miserable. Because as long as you're alive with your senses and soft heart, the reminiscence of all the memories you had with that person will continue to haunt you every second, specially if you're that type of person who struggles at moving forward.

Days with her or him is surely sealed in your veins and it's difficult to unleash, lalo na kapag ayaw mo naman talagang kalimutan.

But on the other hand, I am not saying that leaving isn't thorny. I am not actually good at this kind of talk since I am the one who's always left alone.

BUT, the thing is, leaving is also burdensome and agonizing. Because there are some cases where 'leaving' isn't actually in their will but they have to. They have to leave the person, the people, alone together with the moments they once had. They have to because of some the reasons they cannot fight.

"Both. But the one being left will suffer more." He replied.

"Can you imagine yourself having the same predicament as them?" I asked and looked at him.

"Our mind is powerful, Eli. We can imagine all of the things in the universe, complicated or not, impossible or possible, all. But the truth is, most of it are difficult to handle in real life. Really unendurable. But we have no choice rather than to..."

"...accept." sabay na'ming sabi.

"Yeah, accept." He repeated while bobbing his head.

"The only way we can set ourselves free."