The Frozen Heart

Epilogue

Jack's POV

You know you miss someone, when as soon as something good happens, they're the first one you want to share the news with.

I wanted to do that with (f/n).

More and more kids were able to see me.  Seeing them, all so happy, made me happy too.

They made me forget, just for a moment, about where you truly were.

*flashback*

I'm walking down the sidewalk, whistling with my staff slung over my shoulder.

I feel a thick thud hit the back of my head as I feel snow trickle down my neck.

"Ha! Gotcha, Jack!" A boy laughs.  I turn around with a smirk and a raised eyebrow.

"So you think," I challenge.  I form a perfect snowball behind my back as I talk.

"Now!" The boy shouts.  About a dozen snowballs fly at me all at once.  I can't help but start laughing as the kids jump out and continue.

"Alright, alright! You guys win!" I laugh as they're panting from throwing so much.  I look at all of them for a moment.  I look at each of their faces and smile.  It makes me so happy to see that so many kids believe in me like this. 

"(f/n) won't believe this," I laugh, but I immediately stop.  The kids look up at me with concern.

"Jack? You okay?" One of the older kids asks me.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I brush it off.

"Who's (f/n)?" A much younger kid asks me quite boldly.  A pain in my chest starts to throb.

"She's, uh, an old friend," I reply with a small smile.

"Can we meet her?" 

I know and understand that these are innocent questions, but it hurts too much.

"I'm afraid not," I say, getting groans of disappointment in return. "She would've loved to meet you guys, I'm sure of it." I smile, trying to stay positive.

*end of flashback*

It's amazing how someone who started out as a complete stranger, some weird girl sitting on a bus, could suddenly, out of nowhere, mean the entire world to you.

I care.  I will always care.  Even though she's not here anymore, she's still here.  It's hard to explain.

(F/n) was love.  Love is a contruct, something you can't feel, but you still somehow just know it's there.  That's what they say about our consciousness.  But anyway, I've always believed that love was everywhere.  It's almost like what constructs the atmosphere, maybe the emotional atmosphere?  

In any case, even now, she's still the person I look for in a crowded place, in some type of false hopes that what happened never did.  That in some impossible way, she didn't die, but I don't know.  I never will know.  Who's to say what will ever happen next?  No one ever knows for sure.

What comforted me the most was her eyes.  I remember hearing about how your eyes never change since the day you were born.  Her beautiful (e/c) eyes are what I've always paid attention to.  What I regret is that I never told her so.  Yeah, I've told her I loved her, but I'm more of a man of action.  I expressed myself through what I did when I was around her. 

I forgot to tell her about her eyes.

I forgot to tell her about her hair.

I forgot to tell her how much her laugh made my day, no matter how bad I felt.

I forgot a lot of things.

"So, (f/n)," I say, looking up at the sky, staring at the stars that gleam and shine above us.  Looking at them is always so comforting to me.  Aside from Manny, they were one of the first things I saw with my new eyes.

"If by some way, you can hear me blabber on, just hear me out.  I don't know exactly where I'm going, but I'm on my way.  But, you know, you leaving was sad.  It was devastating, actually.  It was unfortunately me watching the one thing that's truly made me happy slip away.  Not even a slow and cruel way.  You were just...gone.  I have no clue to where you are.  I don't know if you're in some amazing afterlife or your soul's existence is demolished.  Who knows? I choose to believe you are somewhere though.  If you don't know what to believe in, why not believe in the one with a happy outcome?" I let out a small laugh, not really able to believe I'm talking.  I'm probably just talking to myself now.

"I know how cliche this is, (f/n).  But it makes so much sense, the greater the love, the greater the tragedy.  I know, like I mentioned before, I'm a man of action.  I don't do very well with words.  But you can love someone so much, but you can never love people as much as you can miss them.  So, if you got anything from my little rant, (f/n), just remember this.  I'll always think of you.  When I feel the breeze, I'll think of you.  When I feel the sun's warmth against my skin, I'll think of you.  When I watch the waves crash against the stony shores, I'll think of you.  You're easily comparible to nature itself, ironically.  It's beauty is ever changing, but still a hell of a sight to look at.  No matter where I'll be, I'll always remember you."

A/N

Why do I feel like I'm watching Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows movie? Or The Hobbit; The Battle of Five Armies?

I feel like something that I enjoyed being a part of for so long just ended completely.  It's done, it's the end, zilch.

What happens next is your own imagination, you know?

I NEED TO STOP AHH (つд｀)

Are you guys as sad as I am about this?  You've guys rocked, from the very beginning.  It's scary to think this is over.

I love you guys, take care,  ಥ_ಥ