The Bitter End

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Dedicated to @eternallywarped @Tiffanijolly

A/N: This is NOT a happy one shot. Ends in heartbreak, reader be ware. Inspired by the new release of 'Another Life' ft Kerli (PS I am SOBBING)

Everything was perfect. Too perfect. I had everything I could have wanted and more; my dream career as a musician, a nice home, a group of people I called family, and the man of my dreams. I had met Chris a few years ago, he had just gotten out of a relationship and was looking for a companion. After a few months of friendship and one long night you two ended up making out on his sofa.

He practiced on the key board sitting on the coffee table, his fingers dancing along the keys as he hummed carefully. I watched, always amazed by the talent Chris possesses. "I'm ready to bury all of my bones. I'm ready to lie but say I won't. So tell me your secrets and join me in pieces, To rot in this garden made of stones." He sang softly, pausing to write the lyrics on the notepad on the floor beside him. I crawled down and sat behind him, leaning against him and rubbing small circles in his back. He shifted, turning to face you. His arms planted on either side of me as he leaned into me, his forehead pressed against mine. "Can I kiss you y/n?" He asked softly, his voice cracking slightly. Instead on answering him I kissed him tentatively, just barely pressing my lips to his, making sure it was what he wanted. He kissed me back with ferocity, stealing the air from my lungs. He pulled me into him before flipping us and making me straddle him, his hands tangling in my hair as he moved down my jaw. I moaned, raking my nails across his shoulders. But something felt off, something about him was off. This was exactly what I wanted... but the odd feeling crept over me and settled in my heart. "C-Chris-s... s-stop."

It's been a year since that night in his living room, He asked you out a few days after that. But the feeling never went away. He was here but wasn't. He slept beside me at night, holding me close but also at a distance. He kissed me, but it never felt like he kissed me. He smiled, but never really smiled. I was a ghost in his world. But then I met her. And it all came crashing down.

Chris had an off day for the first time in a long time and we decided to go out to eat at the new vegan restaurant for a rare date night. "So I was thinking after this we cou-" He stopped mid-sentence, his eyes focusing on the girl a few tables away. She was petite with long inky hair and pale skin. Honestly she was stunning. I picked at my nails anxiously, not interrupting his staring. "I'll uh... I'll be right back." He mumbled, not waiting for an answer as he walked over to her. I faintly heard their conversation... the odd feeling now strangling me. I wanted to scream his name and demand him come back to me, to pay me the attention he was giving her, to feel the warmth of the smile he flashed her and the joyous sound his his laugh. But I couldn't, wouldn't. Suddenly they both appeared at the table, "Hi, I'm (ex's name). Nice to meet you." She said happily, offering her hand to you. Be venomous. Be vicious. Tell her to leave. My heart screamed, fighting the deep sense of dread in my core. But I couldn't, wouldn't. "Y/n, pleasure to meet you." I said, shaking her hand and offering a small smile. His eyes had a spark I'd never seen before, a new breath of life. After a brief conversation she left, hugging both of you goodbye. And I couldn't help but notice the way his arms lingered around her waist, the way he breathed her in before hesitantly letting her go. Once she left the light slowly faded from his features, settling back on me.

Things weren't the same after that night.

I tried to save it a month later. We were laying in bed; his arm draped across my shoulders, fingers dancing across my skin, holding me to his chest as he stared up to the ceiling. The pale moonlight was the only illumination in the room. "I love you." He froze, tensed, as he shifted away from me. "I care for you deeply as well y/n." I felt my heart shatter into a million pieces. I watched silently as he stood, pulling his shirt back on. "P-Please..." I mumbled, reaching for him, "Stay." My voice cracked, giving away to the pain I felt. His jaw clenched, his hands frozen in place on the hem of the cotton material. "Please!" I pleaded, crawling to him and wrapping my arms around his torso. "Please stay. I need you." I whimpered, as he pulled me off of him gently. He kissed my forehead and cheek, "I'm sorry." He whispered before placing a soft kiss on my lips and disappearing into the night.

"Are you coming to the album release party?" Ricky asked, handing you the fresh cup of coffee he bought for you. I picked at the lid, not caring that the scaling liquid splashed droplets onto my fingertips. "Y/n?" He called softly, pressing my hand into the table top. "Who was she?" I asked hoarsely, I hadn't stopped crying since Chris had left. Ricky sighed, slowly biting down on his lip as he crystal eyes dropped to the table. "I don't-" "Don't be coy. Tell. Me." I growled, fresh tears forming in my eyes. He rubbed the back of his neck, taking a sip of coffee before answering. "She was Chris's ex... the one that got away. They were together for years but... he... he wouldn't reciprocate her feelings. So. It ended. And he is, was, heartbroken." I sniffled, wiping at my eyes before nodding. "You were right." I said quietly, he raised an eyebrow at you, "Is. He is heartbroken. I was just a band-aid." I said before storming out of the coffee shop.

I screamed and cried and smashed the mirror that hung in my bedroom. I begged and pleaded to whatever higher power would listen to make him love me back. I took a shaky breath as I pulled on the black dress before heading out to the party.

The music played softly in the background, fans lingered, waiting for an opportunity to speak with one of the members. "You look beautiful." Chris said softly, directly behind you. I turned to face him, brushing a lock of hair from my eyes. Why is he so fucking beautiful? "Thank you." "Y/n... I'm sorry about what happened. You didn't-don't, deserve that. You deserve the world honestly. You've been with me this whole time and, and I know you feel something is off. You ask all the time and-" "Christopher. I meant what I said. I love you. I love everything about you, with every fiber of my being." My voice cracked slightly, I cleared my throat and dropped my gaze down to his hands. I reached and intertwined my fingers with his. "A-and part of loving you is wanting you h-happy." I stuttered before looking up into his eyes. "You aren't happy with me Chris." I stated, cracking under the feeling of his thumb swiping a tear from my cheek. "You don't deserve this y/n. I want to love you. I want t-" I reached up and kissed him, needing him to understand. "I love you Chris. But I need you to go be with her." I begged softly. There was a moments silence before he placed a kiss to my forehead, "In another life y/n." He whispered before disappearing.

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