Professor Why's Academy for Extraordinary Youngsters

Heroics 112: Science lab

               The next day, the mood in the school had darkened considerably. Galactic Mask went missing on the premises. Every second we got, we went looking for Galactic Mask. In Dr. Mr. Fluffybottom's class, we were bombarded with techniques from the best detectives in the world. I was not excited for Thunderfist's rousing round of "here's how you punch but better", but it needed to be learned. Any one of us might find October, or any of the villains that Situ and I fought on the cruise ship, and we needed to be prepared to beat the absolute crap out of them so we could take them in for questioning.

Ivan walked up to me, same smug look on his face as always. "Hey Flare. Wanna partner up? This gym class is gonna be killer and I don't want to take a dinosaur to the face."

"Good call actually." I replied. "Hey Rob!"

Rob replied in a thunderous voice that shook me to my bowels. "Hey Flare!"

"Wanna partner up in gym class?" I asked.

"You sure?" thundered my dinosaur classmate.

"I need to be ready for anything." I said.

Ivan looked pretty downcast.

"Oh! I usually pair up with Situ. I think she's available!" I said, trying to console him.

Situ was not available. She got Arthur for a partner instead, and was trying to figure out how to wedge a fist into the gaps in a suit of armor. Ivan wound up paired up with... Guy? I think? I wasn't really paying much attention.

After class, I was pretty beat up and worn out. I learned that it's somewhat difficult to hit even the most gentle of dinosaurs in such a way that causes real damage, and not melodramatic acting to make me feel better. Thunderfist gathered us all around, like he often did to tell us exactly what each of us had done wrong that particular day. This day was different though. He sat down on the wood floor, and we all kind of sheepishly followed suit.

"Aight kids... we need to talk." He started. "I saw you tryin' real had out there, and I'm proud of each and every one of ya. Even Guy, who hasn't showed up for a single class. Wherever he is, I hope he's doing well. However, here's the deal. Your professor? Principal? He's a principal. He just has a shiny name. Your principal told us teachers to tell you to leave this one to the professionals, alright? I know you're all older than your cat teacher, so he'll probably be all gusto, but I'm old as crap, okay? So listen up."

I'd never seen Thunderfist express an emotion besides raw vicarious testosterone, so I was silent, as was the rest of the class.

"When I was your age, I went chasing after a spare cat and wound up killing 40 gangsters. I know how you little squirts think. But this sketchy and the reward ain't even that good."

Dennis's hand shot up.

"Excuse me sir. This is the strongest hero in America. The reward is literally the best possible reward."

Thunderfist scratched the back of his very bald head, right where the last patch of hair sat. I could see follicles dying. "Galactic Mask is real old, guys. We'd been telling him for years to retire. That the super shtick was a young man's game and he was over a century old, right? But he had none of it. He'd tell us stuff like "if I retire, who will protect you!" And we were the freakin' heroes! But he's gotten weaker and weaker, and it's not lookin' good. We'll save your hero and bring him back, but whatever you saw... that's the last heroic thing he's gonna do."

All hands but Ivan and Claudia's shot up. Thunderfist picked Arthur.

"Mr. Thunderfist sir, where does that leave the League of Heroes?"