The Independent Women's Club

[17] The person I'm in love with

[17]

"Kelly, can I talk to you for a minute?"

I looked at Julian before responding, but instead of saying anything, he just gave me a nod as a sign of approval. Since everyone is still in the living room, Augustus led me outside of the apartment building.

I faced him as soon as we exited the lobby area. "Why do we have to leave the house?" It seems like he's composing himself, so he couldn't answer my first question. I asked again. "What are we going to talk about?" He smiled at me to assure me that everything is fine. I sighed. "What is it, then?"

"I'm going to give your birthday gift. Are you ready?"

I felt relieved. He looked serious, so I thought he's going to spill something unexpected, but I'm glad it's not the case. "Why do we have to go outside? It's so cold here."

He didn't respond. Instead, he gave me a plain white envelope.

"Is this money?" I joked at him.

"Open it."

"Why do you sound serious? I'm just kiddi—" I couldn't finish my sentence when I realized what was inside the envelope. "I don't think I can...take...this..." Inside the envelope, I found an E-ticket going to Paris, and it includes Guz and I's details.

When I looked at him, I can see in his eyes that he's not willing to hear anything else other than the word 'yes'. But I can't do that.

I tried to calm down before saying anything. "Are you being serious, Guz? A trip to Paris without my consent? I told you that all we have is friendship. I thought you respected my decision."

He bit his lip. "Kelly, that's just a trip to Paris."

"Just a trip? And just the two of us? Out of all the countries, you chose Paris, France? Guz, I'm not born yesterday. I know the meaning of all this."

He sighed. "I thought it's not a big deal because you even went to Bali with Julian. On top of that, it's your first time going out of the country, and during those days you barely know him." He faked his smile. "It was just the two of you. Am I not making any sense, Kelly? Tell me, maybe I'm just being ridiculous right now."

He's right. My first trip outside the country was with Julian. It's just the two of us, but why didn't I decline his offer?

I closed my eyes for a few seconds before saying anything.

"It's because I knew his intentions since the beginning. We didn't go there to act like love birds, Guz. We were there to discover ourselves. Believe me or not, Julian even told me that I shouldn't misunderstand his kind gestures. But in our case, I knew from the beginning that you have feelings for me. I don't want to hurt you, that's why I wanted you to move forward as early as you can. I know how it feels like to run in an infinite circle. I knew how hard it was to accept something that I can't have, that's why I wanted to be completely honest with you. Sometimes, being cruel is the best way to avoid any further damage," I took a deep breath. "Maybe...we should stop seeing each other for the meantime. You can always come to me when you're ready to accept what I can offer. That's all that I can do for you, Guz. I'm sorry."

He bit his lip and slowly gave me a nod. "Alright. If that's what would make feel you better, I'll respect that," I just stared at him. I don't know what to say. "But just a piece of advice, Kelly. If you really mean what you're saying, then you should stop seeing Julian, too. If I want to prevent any further damage, you told me that I have to accept it. As you can see, he's in love now. There's no need to run into that infinite circle. I'm telling you this because you need to move forward, too. It seems like you don't notice it yet, but I told you, I can read someone's actions."