Falling - 𝒥𝑒𝓈𝓈 𝑀𝒶𝓇𝒾𝒶𝓃𝑜

Chapter 28: Broken Souls

I didn't bother to search for Jess once the marathon was done. Rory had run out of the gym which meant that Kirk won automatically. Long story short: Lorelai wasn't pleased.

I know that right now, Jess and Rory will sit somewhere together, discussing everything that has happened and I have to except his decision. I want him to be happy, but why does it have to hurt me so much?

I always imagined the day we would see each other again, a smile on his face, his arms wide open and I would fall in them. We would be happy, we would cry. None of that has happened.

From the moment he came to Stars Hollow we hadn't done anything but fighting and arguing, hurting each other. It is nothing like what we had back in New York. Maybe I am holding on to an illusion, I can't really tell.

I stare into the darkness, the lights in Luke's diner shining bright in the early morning. The snow around the gazebo making me shiver. I have opened my results from my exams. All straight A's except for one: Chemistry, B-.

I can't bring up any emotion, not about the situation with Jess, not even for my results. I don't want to go home, even though the marathon has ended an hour ago. The soft light of the sun is visible at the horizon and here I sit on the ground of the gazebo, doing nothing.

Behind me, footsteps approach and a deep voice gets me out of my overthinking. 'May I?'

I look up to see Dean, his eyes completely red, his gaze still furious. I nod a little and he takes place next to me, making a weird sound when he touches the cold ground. We both smile a little stupid at that, and everything goes back silent in an instant.

'I'm sorry', I whisper. 'Sorry for what?' He asks but I don't answer, all I can do is stare in front of me. 'I believe we both lost something', he adds and I look up at him before nodding. He knows I feel more for Jess than friendship, maybe he has read Paris' article. I can't be sure.

In the distance I see a dark clothed figure walk towards Luke's, a stab in my stomach when I recognize Jess. He also has been outside as I predicted. I look down at my results, a tear running down my face but I don't want Dean to see it.

'Those are rather good', he tries to change the subject. I sob, laying the results on my other side when I look back at Luke's. It's almost like Jess' eyes meet mine for one second, but he turns around and walks upstairs either way. He couldn't care less.

'I love him', I admit for the first time. A loud crying sound escaping my throat. Dean lays his arm around my back and I lean my head against his chest. I've never felt this weak before, especially not with someone around me. I close my arms around Dean and he does the same with me.

We sit like that for a while, not saying a word when our emotions take over. He doesn't cry, but I do. A lot. I know how much he loves Rory and the way she has treated him is horrible. We are both broken souls.