To someone special

CHAPTER 11

When I reached home it was quite late and I was having difficulty to even walk due to dizziness and tiredness. I was welcomed by mom who was fuming at me for coming late and I couldn't give any proper reason except for defending myself that I am doing my project with a friend.

" What time it is? Is this the time for you to reach home? What did you expect me to do? To welcome you at whatever time you come and believe whatever shit you say? I thought that you have eloped with someone. Even though if you did, I don't bother but you shouldn't. Now tell me where the hell were you? " she yelled at me and I was not able to answer her.

" I was just having this project and it took some extra time and I couldn't..." she cut me off before I could finish my explanation.

" Wow! Now you have the tongue to tell me that you have more important work than to reach home. Don't you dare forget what can I do to you if you disobey me and what project you are talking about huh? " she asked again folding her hands in front of me and I was lost for words. I lowered my head and tears formed in my eyes when she told me the things she could do and I forgot that I should answer her and started shaking in fear. She caught my arms roughly and asked. I was sure there will be bruises formed in that area.

" Mom, its hurting please stop. We have a project....and I need to complete it... soon. And... I am....sorry for coming late " I stuttered and finally she let me go and I exhaled a sigh of relief but the pain was unbearable in my arms.

" Whatever it may be I don't care but I should take care of your filthy life coz I will be charged if you go missing. Now get out of my sight " she seethed in anger and I gathered all the strength in me to reach the stairs. I tried walking as fast I could but my feet were giving up on me. With much difficulty I made it to my room and locked it.

I threw the bag on the floor and went to bathroom. Without even removing my clothes I stepped in shower and cold water hit me like a hurricane. The cold water hitting me was not I was feeling about but the past I had which haunts me like a shadow every time. I cried and cried until I was exhausted to no end and removed my wet clothes and looked in the mirror. As expected, there were bruises on my arms and I laughed at myself looking at my reflection.

I laughed for all the beatings I had got from mom. I laughed for being this weak and pathetic. I laughed for my unlucky self. I laughed for being born. I laughed for everything happened from the day I lost dad and I came to realization that I don't belong to anyone and anywhere.

I didn't realize that the cold water was still falling on my body and that caused my body to shiver and my teeth to clatter.

" You are useless. You are nothing to anyone. Even if you die someday no one will come to see you. You are just a worthless shit which causes only burden to everyone " I said to myself in the mirror.

I started slapping myself on cheeks and scolded myself for all the things and after what felt like hours, I lost all the energy and sat down on the floor itself with still cold water flowing down my body. With the help of wall, I got up slowly and took the towel and dried my body and came out. I took a loose t-shirt and pajamas, wore them and laid down on bed. My whole body still felt cold and I know I will catch cold if I don't dry my hair but as of now I just wanted to lie down and just slip into a slumber where there will be no need for me to wake up and face this cruel reality world.

I closed my eyes expecting to sleep but my mind kept wandering everywhere and tears kept strolling down making my pillow wet. I slowly sat up and took the picture of mine with dad and my mom and hugged it to my body tightly. I kept imagining all the good times I had spent with dad and smiled weakly.

It was summer and we were enjoying our vacation at a beach house. My dad made all the arrangements before and I was really excited to spend time close to environment. And dad too always used to take me to different places which consists of greenery and I really like being close to environment away from all the city pollution. I smiled as I stood in front of shore and inhaled the salty scent of it. It was evening and the sun was almost setting so the scene in front of me was mesmerizing.