The Singer's Girl

Chapter 35

CAROLINE'S POV

I drove back to our apartment after school Friday, I had gone everyday this week and it had been good. The medication I was on was really helping my situation, Taylor says I would be even better if I kept going to counseling, but I haven't let her schedule another appointment yet.

After I had gotten parked in front of our building I went up to the top floor and found Taylor in the kitchen making cupcakes.

"Hey you." She said when I walked in.

"Hey." I said as I put my backpack down.

"How was school?" She asked.

"Fine." I sad, sitting down on a barstool at the counter.

I watched as she took the cupcakes out of the oven and frosted them. She handed a frosted one to me to eat before asking me a question.

"So I was thinking I could schedule another appointment for somewhere in the next few days, does that sound okay?"

"I don't wanna go back." I said.

"You have to, I'm sorry." She sighed.

"No I don't, I'm already better." I argued. She didn't say anything and went back to frosting.

"Taylor don't." I said.

But she did, and on Monday after school she was driving me over there again.

"It'll be fine." Taylor said as she turned into the parking lot.

"You're not even the one that has to do it." I grumbled.

We went in, they called my name, I followed Amy into the back room, and it was just like last time. She kept asking me questions about my parents, but this time it was mostly about Taylor. She wanted to know if Taylor ever abused me and if I'm getting all of this anxiety from that. And then she wanted to know if the reason I have all this anxiety is because Taylor is famous.

"How much time does your mom typically set aside to spend with you?" She asked, and at this point I kind of felt like she was trying to get me taken away from Taylor.

"I'm with her all the time." Was all I said.

"Is she there when you have these panic attacks?" She questioned.

"Yeah." I said, trying to keep my answers short.

"Has there ever been any times where you felt like her being a celebrity hindered your relationship with her?" Amy asked.

"I already answered that." I said.

"And what was the answer to that?" She pressed.

"No." I said.

"Is there ever times where she's busy and she doesn't have any time for you? Or you've been out in public with her and you've been made uncomfortable by the crowds coming up to her?" She asked and I hated her for ever thinking that Taylor was a bad parent.

"No." I said.

"Okay, this would work better if you maybe elaborated, put some effort into the conversation, something." She said looking at me. And I looked right back at her without saying a word. The appointment only lasted about 20 more minutes. But they were 20 minutes straight out of hell, I swore she was trying to get me to say something bad about Taylor or admit that I had panic disorder because of Taylor, which wasn't true.

"She kept asking me all of these questions about you. She was like 'how does it make you feel that your mom is a celebrity?' and 'does she ever have time for you?' and 'do the large crowds bother you?' and stuff like that. I don't want to go back again, it does nothing for me, the whole time she was just trying to accuse you of being a bad mom." I told Taylor on the car ride home.

"Well you had to have talked about something else too, you were in there for a long time." Taylor said.

"No, all of it was about you. She even asked me if you'd ever abused me." I said and then Taylor didn't have anything to say after that.

Back at home I did my homework, ate supper, and eventually got ready for bed. Taylor followed me upstairs to my room that night to tell me good night, I think it really bothered her that they asked me those things about her.

"Goodnight." She said, sitting on the edge of my bed.

"I love you." She said as she bent down to kiss my forehead.

"Love you, goodnight." I said as she got up. She stopped in the doorway to turn off the light and I could feel her looking at me. After she left I knew one thing for sure, I wasn't going back to counseling.