A Quick Fix (Oneshot Collection)

Downward Dog (Metallica)

Notes: Requested by Fairy11 on Rockfic! I know this probably isn't the best, but I hope you enjoy it all the same 💖 (takes place during Load era, btw).

Kirk and Lars engage in a little yoga.

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Kirk took in a deep breath and let it out slowly, relaxing his body. Recently Kirk has been getting into meditation and yoga as a means to keep his head clear and his body nice and limber. But, like all good things in Kirk's life, there's always that one person who comes along to spoil it. Right now, that person was Lars.

They were both sitting in the Lotus position (or at least Lars was trying to) and doing some breathing exercises Kirk had shown Lars. The room was completely quiet, save for their breathing, and it made Lars slightly anxious. He cracked an eye open and peeked over at Kirk who appeared to be off in his own world. Lars felt silly and bored, but he figured he'd humor Kirk since the guitarist swore up and down that this stuff actually worked. It didn't stop Lars from asking questions though.

"What the hell am I supposed to be doing?" Lars inquired.

"You're supposed to relax your entire body and mind and find your center," Kirk explained, keeping his eyes shut as he breathed in and out in blissful peace. "Have you found your center?"

"You mean, like, my chest?" Lars asked obtusely.

"Lars..." Kirk sighed.

"What? It's in the center!" argued the Dane.

"I meant in the metaphorical sense, you idiot," Kirk admonished, losing his perfect posture and shooting an irritated look over at Lars.

"Oh, well that isn't confusing at all," Lars scoffed with sarcasm.

"Can you just be quiet please," Kirk huffed in frustration as he tried to relax. "You're messin' with my aura."

"Aura?" Lars snickered humorously.

"Shut it!" Kirk cut off.

The room fell silent once again after Lars was done giggling and Kirk went back to concentrating on finding his inner peace. Lars shook his head and practiced on what basic stretches Kirk had taught him, but he was too distracted at the moment. Kirk had cranked the heat up to an ungodly temperature, making him sweat bullets as he hyperventilated from these so called breathing exercises. It made Lars thankful that he'd decided to cut off all his hair. Not only that but Kirk had told him to wear something stretchy and comfortable. Turns out spandex becomes a second skin when drenched in sweat.

Kirk had on a pair of yoga pants that were essentially fancy sweatpants, but were more revealing. Lars couldn't keep his eyes off of Kirk as the guitarist began to do all these weird elaborate poses. The names of these stretches were as hard to pronounce as they were to do and Lars didn't think he was ready to attempt any of them, but he certainly got a kick out of Kirk bending into these impossible shapes; like a human pretzel. Kirk kept his eyes closed the whole time too, giving Lars free reign to stare all he wants.

Kirk got into this pose that made him look like a seal, with his lower half stretching across his yoga mat and his upper half extending up towards the ceiling. Lars watched as beads of perspiration trickled down Kirk's tanned chest or how his short curly hair had stuck to his forehead. Lars got thirsty just from looking at Kirk working off his entire body weight in sweat. And, of course, that wasn't the end of it. Kirk had many moves in his arsenal to keep Lars captivated.

Another one involved Kirk planting his feet on the ground and bending backwards onto his palms until his body was in the shape of an arch. This pose accentuated certain points of interest for lack of a better term. It made Lars realize that Kirk's pants were a lot tighter than he previously thought and, hey whaddya know, so were his after watching Kirk for long enough. There was just something about that way Kirk's body bended and how his sinew rippled with each movement.

Suddenly, the room felt even hotter than before. Lars couldn't stop his mind from going to the gutter when he thought of all the positions he could fold Kirk into. He wanted to put the brunette to the test and see just how flexible he really is. I wonder if he can get his ankles behind his head, Lars thought dazedly as the heat and his growing arousal left him in a tizzy. The only logical thing to do now was to feed into his delirium, reminding him of something he saw once in a magazine.

"Hey Kirk," Lars said, lounging back on his palms.

Kirk opened his eyes and paused whatever absurd stretch he was in the middle of and gazed over at Lars with a puzzled expression. He was panting from exertion.

"Huh?"

"You wanna try downward dog?" Lars inquired tactfully.

Kirk furrowed his eyebrows. "What's that?"

"You mean to tell me that you're into this whole yoga thing and you don't even know what downward dog is?" Lars razzed, scoffing like a pompous aristocrat. "You fraud."

"What is it?" Kirk beckoned, sitting back on his legs as Lars hyped up some new move he wasn't aware of.

"I don't know if I should show you now," Lars teased, turning his face away and sticking his nose up in the air.

"Oh, come on! Don't do that to me!" Kirk whined. "If you know something I don't then that means you're holding out on me!"

He knew there was a good chance that Lars was just pulling his leg, but he has heard something similar to that before, so who knows? Maybe Lars wasn't full of shit. Lars could see the desperation and excitement in Kirk's eyes and knew immediately that his dumb plan had somehow worked. Honestly, Lars was surprised Kirk hadn't come across the term before. Lars only remembered it because it was objectively dirty and now Kirk would soon come to know what downward dog was. He had to repress the urge to smirk.

"Please!" Kirk begged, flashing his trademark puppy eyes.

"Well, I guess I can show you," Lars sighed as he relented, clambering over towards Kirk. "But only 'cus you asked so nicely."