Afterglow (Book Three)

Thirty One

Demi

I watched with tears threatening to pour down my cheeks as Nick packed his suitcase.

It's September 22nd and Nick is leaving for New York early tomorrow morning. We've been married for 4 months and already Nick is leaving for god knows how many weeks. I didn't think we'd face this challenge so early on in our marriage. I know that with our jobs it's inevitable, but I thought that with a silent agreement, that was obviously one sided, that we were taking a break for a while. I know that I've been in the studio but I don't have any plans to release anything until next year because I wanted to spend the rest of this year with my little family.

"Babe?" I jumped from my stare and glanced to meet Nick's gaze as a tear dropped onto my hand that was playing with the locket hanging around my neck. "Baby" I sniffled and wiped at my cheek, pulling my gaze from Nick's as I tried to compose myself.

"I'm fine" Nick lightly chuckled and shook his head.

"You're not fine" he took a step towards me and lightly tugged me towards him. I slumped into him; my face nuzzled into his neck as an unexpected sob slipped out.

"I don't want you to go" Nick ran his fingers into my hair and pressed a kiss to my shoulder.

"I know, Baby, but it'll go so fast" I shook my head which just caused Nick to lightly chuckle. "It will, Demi, I promise" I shook my head and sniffled, wiping at my cheeks. I opened my mouth to talk but all that came out was a sob. "Baby, what's going on?" he took my hands in his as he tugged me behind him. He took a seat on the edge of the bed and pulled me to stand between his legs. I stared down at our hands, my eyes momentarily landing on my stomach before I broke into another fit of sobs. "Demi, you're scaring me now. What's going on?" he stroked a strand of hair behind my ear and wiped at my cheeks. I swallowed the lump in my throat and sniffled, pulling my hands from his so that I could run my hand along my stomach.

"I'm pregnant" his mouth dropped.

"A-Are you-Are you serious?"

"I found out yesterday. I just-I didn't know how to tell you" a wide smile suddenly spread across Nick's face and as much as I wanted to reciprocate it, I couldn't, because Nick is leaving for New York in less than 24 hours.

"Baby, this is amazing" I shook my head which caused Nick's eyebrows to furrow in confusion.

"No, it isn't, because you're not gonna be here. You're all the way across the country for god knows how many weeks and I don't know when you'll be coming home. I have a toddler to care for and I thought that this pregnancy would be different. I thought that when we had our second child that you'd be there throughout the entire pregnancy but you're not going to be, are you? I put my career on hold because I wanted us to be a family. I wanted us to try for another baby. I wanted you to be there for everything but it's like when I was pregnant with Peyton all over again" I pushed myself away from his grip and stormed into the master bathroom, my tears pouring uncontrollably down my cheeks. I was breathing heavily and running my hand along my stomach as I sobbed, trying desperately to calm myself. As much as I want to be excited about this baby, I can't. I can't even force myself to be excited because Nick is going to miss the first half of this pregnancy.

"You can't say that I wasn't there for your pregnancy with Peyton" I turned to Nick who stood in the doorway with an annoyed look on his face. "I was there, Demi, and we weren't even together" I chewed down on my lip as I tried to calm my breathing and my sobs. "I'm sorry that I took the opportunity to do this movie. I'm sorry that I'm trying to get myself back out there as an actor. This movie was too much of a good opportunity to pass up" I sniffled and wiped the tears from my cheeks. "I didn't plan for you to get pregnant and I definitely didn't ask you to put your career on hold, Demi" I released a chuckle that sounded more like a scoff.

"Well, that makes everything okay, doesn't it?" Nick sighed and ran his hand over his head.

"I didn't..."

"I know what you meant, you don't need to make up some bullshit" I would have stormed from the bathroom but Nick was blocking my only exit so I stood in the middle of the room with my arms crossed over my chest and tears rapidly pouring down my cheeks. "I can't believe I'm doing this alone" I slumped down onto the toilet and leant forward, my fingers locking in my hair as I sobbed. There was worry and anxiety bubbling away in my stomach at the fear of handling the first trimester, and possibly the second trimester, alone.

"Baby, if I could..." I glared up at him so he shut himself up.

"Just go back to your packing" I stared down at my hands as I began to pick at my chipped nail polish.

"Demi..."

"Just go back to your packing, Nick. I don't want to listen to your shit right now" I kept my eyes down until Nick sighed and actually left the room. Tears just began to fall back down my cheeks as the realisation that Nick was leaving me sunk in. How am I going to handle this alone? We've been married for 4 months and we've already hit a major bump in the road. How are we going to make it to a year at this rate?

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