Owned by a Billionaire (Monteverde Series 1)

59

"Lord, I don't know what to do anymore. I love Aaron so much but I don't want to hurt Drei. Drei deserves none of these things I've caused him. I am not worthy of his love and I know that I never will be. He's been such a good friend and I don't want him to die. Please Lord, save him from this and I promise that I'll do the right thing. Even if it will hurt me. Even if it will kill me. Please don't let Drei die. He deserves a far more better life than the life I'm giving him. He deserves to be loved and not to be left. Please Lord. Let him live." Bumagsak ang mga luha ko habang nakatingin sa altar kung san may rebulto ng Panginoon.

"Maybe Aaron's not the right one for me. I've loved Drei before and maybe I'll learn to love him again. Maybe Aaron's just a reminder that there are things in this world that we can't have even if our hearts yearn for it so much. I love him. Too much that I'm willing to forget the world for him. But I can't do it when someone's life is at stake. I can't do it because my conscience won't let me."

Nanginig ang mga balikat ko at tuluyan na akong napahagulgol. I hate being in crossroads. I hate having to choose because I know that I lack good judgement and I tend to make wrong decisions. But now I am forced to face one. To choose between two. To love or be loved. It has always been one of the most frequently asked questions when it comes to love.

But can't I love and be loved at the same time? Can't there be a choice that benefits all? Can there be a potion which can magically heal broken hearts? No. And at the end of the day I know that I need to choose. And my choice scares me.

"Lord I'm begging you. Spare him and I promise that I'll do the right thing." Nagsign of the cross ako at yumuko sa altar bago tuluyang umalis sa hospital chapel. Pinunasan ko ang rumagasang luha ko. My eyes were bloodshot. Hindi pa nagigising si Drei. Kanina ay lalong bumagal ang heartbeat niya kaya kinabahan ako.

Naglakad ako pabalik sa kwarto niya at nakita kong nakaupo si Aaron sa labas. Nakahilig ang ulo niya sa pader habang tulala siya sa kisame. Napalingon siya sakin at nakita ko ang pag-aalala sa mga mata niya. Nanakit ang puso ko ng tignan ko ang mukha niya. Nagbawi nalang ako ng tingin at nilagpasan siya.

Pipihitin ko na sana pabukas ang pinto ng kwarto ni Drei ng maramdaman ko ang paghawak niya sa braso ko. "C-chief." His voice was breaking and I shut my eyes tightly to block the tears that were threatening to fall.

"B-bakit?" Bigla niya akong niyakap at pinigilan ko ang sarili kong yakapin siya pabalik. "Drei will be okay soon. He's a tough man." He mumbled encouragements. Nanghihinang napatango nalang ako bago ko siya marahang tinulak.

"Pasok lang ako. Bantayan ko siya." Bulong ko. Hindi niya parin binibitawan ang kamay ko. Ginawaran niya ako ng halik sa noo. "M-mahal na mahal kita. Remember that." Nakatakas ang isang luha sa mata ko at agad ko yung pinunasan ng hindi niya na makita pa. Muli lang akong tumango bago humiwalay at pumasok sa loob.

I saw Manang sitting on the couch while looking at Drei. I told her to take a break and grab something to eat and she nodded. I pulled a monoblock and dragged it beside Drei's bed. The violet color of his fingers was subsiding. I took his hand. "H-hoy Raven Andrei. Ninenerbyos na ako. Gumising ka na diyan. The doctor said you were in bad condition but you're doing better. Please heal fast. P-please."

They said that talking to the patient even if he or she is unconscious is good. Because there's a possibility that they are listening. I clasped his hand tighter. "Sorry ha. Wala na akong ibang ginawa kundi saktan ka. Alam mo hindi ko nga deserve yang pagmamahal mo eh. You're too good, too nice to fall for someone as messed up as I am. Sorry kasi kung hindi sakin wala ka sana sa ganitong sitwasyon. Naging makasarili ako."

The machine he was connected to beeped. "G-gising ka na Rad." Bibitawan ko na sana ang kamay niya ng gumalaw ito. Gulat na napatingin ako sa kanya at unti unti siyang nagmulat ng mata. His eyes bore down on me. "C-cassidy..."