Bottle In The Basement

III

There's a good chance that Jim could have gotten to the door and stopped it from closing, if he had been mentally and physically fit. But as a recovering alcoholic, he knew that he could not. So with no effort to stop the door from closing, he sat with a grimace as he watched the last fragments of the sane world he knew fall behind the heavy oak wood.

Then there was darkness. Darkness. That word he hated so much, one of his worst fears, right next to alcohol. And now he was trapped in complete darkness along with a cellar full of alcohol.

Sometimes it's funny how ironic life can get, especially when you least need irony in it. He was facing his two worst fears, both at once, and oddly enough he didn't feel scared. Or anything at all for that matter. All he felt was numb.

It wasn't until minutes later that the situation he was in became fully present and important to Jimmy at all. He hobbled back up the stairs with the unobvious slight limp of someone who's recovering from alcohol abuse.

Finally reaching the heavy oak door which had so suddenly became idle once more, Jimmy reached out his handed and gave a slight push. No give. This time he reached out with both hands and gave a much harder push, panic finally flooding in. There was no handle, no light, and no one home. Jim collapsed on the top step, shuddering as if he was just punched and in shock.

Sweat began rolling down his neck and back in great waves. The task which had once appeared conquerable and simple was so suddenly gut-wrenching and terrifying. He felt as though his intestines had left him and were sitting in a heaping pile on the floor.

Breathing shakily, he got to a semi-standing position but quickly sat back down, scared as if he might go toppling down the dark stairway if he were to continue.

Random thoughts breached the walls of his exposed mind now that his shields were down. The thought of his mother, who had walked out on him and his father when he was far too young to remember.

Then the thought of his wife, whom left him and the earth not too long after his daughter's birth. The daughter whom he never had the chance to explain it all to, who never knew what happened to her mother. And for Christ's sake of all things, it was a car accident that took her. That cruel irony again!

Jim was in tears now over it all. Over his mother, over his wife, and mostly over his daughter Cally whom he missed so much. That dark cellar he was locked in was far away now, practically a different world. For the time being, he was in his own land of his mind, cowering away from the rising tide of horrifying thoughts that he was beginning to drown in.