Those Strange Feelings

CHAPTER 55

JENNIE'S POV

"It's so cold"

I said as I rub my hands on my arms when I go out in my room. The unbearable coldness at this hour wakes me up so early, I still need to sleep because I have a practice of my dance steps for my song entitled Solo, we will all attending an awards night tonight but I am the only one will perform my number.

The girls are still sleeping at this hour. I checked the black digital clock on the wall and see that it's only 3:20 in the morning 'Its so early' I was about to click the switch in the kitchen when someone speak up.

"You're already up."

"AAH!" I quickly search for the light and see Lisa sipping calmly in her cup like she didn't get shocked when I screamed.

"What are you doing in the dark?!"

"It helps me to get my peace of  mind." She put down the cup and look at me.

"Want some?"

"No, thanks. I don't like chocolates." I answered because I knew she's having her favorite hot chocolate. I prefer having a hot milk in the morning so I go at the counter and start to make my drink.

Lisa didn't response, I look back at her and see her head leaning at the table with her arm as her pillow.

Is she sleeping???

I fake my cough to catch her attention but she didn't move even a bit. I continue my business while stealing a glance to her from time to time. I don't know but an image of her flashed in my mind that makes me feel so sad and guilty at the same time.. in the middle of the dawn having a silent moment with a cup of hot drink, cold wind and just a darkness whose keeping her accompanied  before I came makes me wanna sit beside her, pull her into a hug and ask what's going on.

But I know I can't just do that...

I pull the chair infront of her that made her go back from sitting properly. Without any noise I sit infront of her and shamelessly examine her features. Her hair that is scatterred in her grey sweater looks so messy, those big doe eyes that are usually full of joy and desire is now looking at the cup with no life, no energy, and no sign of happiness, just a cold and blank stare. Her lips looks so pale and dry now. The lively and bubbly Lisa that we usually have is very opposite from the Lisa I am seeing now.

"Did you already sleep, Lisa?" I break the silence.

"I take a snap."

"Why don't you get a proper rest in your room? It's too cold here."

"I can't sleep there." She answered after a few seconds.

"Why?"

"The memories inside that room makes me keep up at night. Every time I close my eyes, it automatically comes inside my head."

I look away while gasping some air. Eventhough she didn't say the exact memories that she's referring to, I knew it was our memories. My heart is pounding so fast every seconds that had passed. I didn't reply back and with a trembling hands I took my milk and drink it.

"Who gave you those gloves?" She asked when I am drinking.

"A-Ah this?" I look at my gloves. "Dave gave me this yesterday when they come here to visit me." I bit my lips.

"I see."

Then Lisa slowly crumpling  the small paper bag sitting at the chair beside her. I didn't notice that there's a paper bag there not until she crumpled it.