Slipping Through My Fingers (Origin Trio Moms)

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Yes, I'm posting this at midnight. Yes, I should be sleeping. Yes, enjoy this little... one-shot, I guess.

"Mom, I'm gonna be late!" he says as he wolfs down his rice bowl. I smile warmly at him.

"Okay, sweetie. Don't forget your handkerchief and your Kleenex box!"

"Mom!"

"You know how it is. No excuses!"

"Ugh, fine!" He laughs.

I couldn't stop smiling. My precious boy is off to that wretched school again. I don't know how it makes him happy, coming home with broken bones and trauma. As long as he's happy, I'm happy. Schoolbag in hand, he leaves home in the early morning, waving goodbye with an absent-minded smile. I watch him go with a surge of that well-known sadness and I have to sit down for a while.

I walk to the living room. I sit on the couch, my head in my hands. The feeling that I'm losing him forever and without really entering his world. I look up. I glance at his room. Should I? I sigh as I enter my precious boy's room. I look at his numerous All Might posters. A picture frame takes my attention. I waltz my way to it and take it in my hands. It was him in All Might's onesie, smiling big. He was adorable. We always played 'Save Mom'. I remember his giggles as he tried to copy All Might's laugh. I'm glad whenever I can share his laughter. I laugh at the memory. That funny little boy.

I left the room. As I'm walking in the hallway, I see pictures I took of him. He grew so much. A wave of sadness fills me. Slipping through my fingers all the time, I try to capture every minute, the feeling in it. I observe his first birthday. Hisashi was in the picture frame, laughing at the mess Izuku made on his face. I took the picture. The scene was so vivid. Chocolate cake on his cheeks, big wide smiles on the three of us. My eyes shift onto the next photo.

We were at the park and Izuku caught a baby bird. He didn't catch it, but the way he said it...

"Mommy!!! Birdie!!!"

"Where did you find it, Izuku?" Hisashi had asked.

"On the floor!!!"

"Oh no, he fell off of his nest," I said.

"No mommy or daddy?"

"Not really, he just fell off of his home. We need to find his nest before his mommy comes back," I crouched to his level, shuffling his hair. His eyes grew sparkles like every time he would feel the urge to save someone.

"Save birdie!!!"

"Here, show me where you found it," Hisashi took Izuku's free hand and Izuku showed him the place. I took the picture of him and the rescued bird. That was his first rescue. Now, I look back on what he did. Saving Bakugo like that was reckless of him, even after he saved that little boy from a villain.

Slipping through my fingers all the time, do I really see what's in his mind? Each time I think I'm close to knowing, he keeps on growing. I look at the recent pictures. His first day of middle school. He looked nervous. Maybe I don't know what's on his mind. He keeps telling me everything is fine, and that he can control that new Quirk of his. He always looked nervous in middle school, shrugging it off each time I asked him. I sigh, another wave of sadness shook my body. Slipping through my fingers all the time.

.
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Sleep in our eyes, him and me at the breakfast table. I'm feeling asleep again when my head hits the miso soup bowl. I jump awake, hearing his laughter. I look at him and squish his cheek. He gets angry at me, like always but I smile at him. Barely awake, I let precious time go by. Then when he's gone there's that odd melancholy feeling, the one I felt when he got kidnap. The news was telling how they'll bring him back and what will be the new security of this supposed great school. There was a sense of guilt I can't deny.

What did I do to deserve this stress and anxiety each time he leaves? What happened to the wonderful adventures? The ones where we would go to the beach and he would get scared of a crab.

"Mommy!" he had screamed while running away from the crab. I couldn't help but laugh. "It's gonna pinch me!"

"No, it won't. He's scared of you."

"But he has pincers, and I have nothing!"

I laughed once again. I had to show him how to scare them off.

"It's easy. You make yourself intimidating, like so," I buffed my chest and looked menacingly at the poor crab, "then you screamed at them while chasing them."

I did those exact things. People at the beach might've thought I was crazy, but I was glad to see my little Katsuki following suit and never got scared of crabs. The places I had planned for us to go. I look at the pictures on the wall. The sun, the sea, the mountains. Well, some of that we did but most we didn't, like the air and the wonders. And why, I just don't know. I shrugged, a shiver runs down my spine.

Slipping through my fingers all the time, I try to capture every minute. I walk to his room. The pictures in the hallway remind me of the good times, the feeling in it. The first time his Quirk manifested, the first time he got his first gold medal, his first day of high school. Slipping through my fingers all the time.

I enter his room. There are trophies all over the place but in an organized way. I take one, feeling all the emotions Katsuki had when he held it. But do I really see what's in his mind? I sigh, placing the trophy back. Each time I think I'm close to knowing, he keeps on growing. He lived a traumatic event. I tried to convince him that he needed help for years, but there he goes, taking a boy's hand and smiling while doing so. I watched the footage. Did he make real friends? Slipping through my fingers all the time.

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Sometimes I wish that I could freeze the picture. His smile when he was younger. I would do anything to keep that smile. When he passed on television for the Sports Festival, he didn't have it. Until he came to see me. I couldn't hold the tears. The picture now has small puddles. His smile, his happy energy. I had to save it from the funny tricks of time.

Slipping through my fingers... I hear the door sliding. I look behind me. He's there, a box of steamed buns in his hand, a small smile on his face. I smile, hugging him. He's surprised at first but hugs me back. I manage to make him stay and sit down beside me. I ask him about his day, and he tells me it was great. After a while, he becomes silent.

"Mom..." he looks up to meet my eyes

"Yes, sweetie?"

"I need to confess about something that's been bothering me."

"I'm listening."

He faintly smiles at me before looking down again. My awkward little boy.


Schoolbag in hand he leaves home in the early morning, waving goodbye with an absent-minded smile...

Ah! the feels, right through my heart, my poor soul! I thought I was about to cry when I wrote this. It's kinda challenging writing memories in a coherent way and that fits the lyrics. But hey, that's why I do this! Anyway, the animator for this video is Blogbi WvW. If you liked this video, go give them some love!

Next up, get ready for a little Halloween special!

~E

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