Tattoos and Scars | Completed, Unedited

4 | He's Smoking

I've been crying for hours now.

I don't know what else to do. I can't stop crying no matter how hard I try. At this point, even I'm not in my own control. I've lost myself, and this new Bailey won't listen to me. She's hurt and broken beyond repair and doesn't have the strength to fix herself.

I don't even know what I'm crying for. I guess everyone has a breaking point in their life, and this is my breaking point. I'm tired. Not because I haven't eaten anything in god knows how many days, but because I can't take it anymore.

I can't take being constantly abused. I know that I'm unwanted, too much for this world to carry. I can't take the fact that I'll never be anything more than just a burden. And now I've witnessed a murder, and they're probably going to kill me.

But there's one thing my mind is set on. A gem amidst my broken soul. I don't want to die.

I know there's something more for me out there. And that's the piece of thread that keeps pulling me to tomorrow. Without it, I'd be stuck, with no path to follow, just a lost cause. But my small boat of hope keeps me from drowning my sea of sorrow. I'm not letting anyone take that hope away.

I hear a knock on the door, and I nearly fall off the bed. Like all the other times I hear a noise, my heart starts racing.

"You know you gotta eat something!" I hear Blake's voice from outside. I get off the bed, and slowly make my way to the door. I open it and quickly back up. "You're very jumpy," He points out. "Come on, lunch is ready."

"Lunch?"

"Yeah. Follow me."

I look at him distrustingly as I clutch my hands to stop them from shaking.

"Have you been crying?"

I don't reply, but back up more. My hearts trying to jump out of me, and my arms are legs are shaking like an earthquake. I don't trust him. I don't trust anyone anymore.

"We're not going to kill you, I convinced him," He coaxes, stepping closer. But I back up farther. "Are you not gonna talk?"

No. I just want to leave. I'd rather be with my dad than two strangers in a large and empty house.

"I need to return home," I tell him, keeping my voice firm and my body away from him.

"That... I don't know, but come and eat lunch, and we'll talk about it there."

I still don't say anything, but back up farther. Terror fills me up, and my eyes widen as he tries to step closer. Is he just like them? Is he going to take advantage of me?

"I'm not going to eat you, why are you so scared?"

Not wanting to reply to his question, I stop backing up, and finally take a step forward. He reaches for my hand, but quickly bring it away from him. "Okay, I get it, no touching. Just follow me."

I nod, and he starts walking ahead of me, and I follow him cautiously. The hallway is decked with chandeliers and paintings, and marble floor is shiny enough for me to see myself in, but that doesn't mean these are nice people.

The kitchen comes into view, and on it's counter I see the one I recall as Adrian. He's got a cigarette in his mouth, and my stomach lurches. I stop in my tracks again.

"Why'd you stop?" Blake whines.

"I'm not hungry."

"What's wrong here?" His eyes follow my line of sight. My eyes are on Adrian's cigarette. "Adrian, stop smoking," He demands. Adrian simply rolls his eyes, as I puts down his cigarette.

"Is that cool?"

I don't understand why they're trying to be so nice to me. It's mostly Blake, but I don't understand. I was brought here as a witness, and now they're acting like I'm their guest. I feel so much at unrest, and all I'm trying to do is protect myself.

I don't want to go through what happened that night again. I just want to curl up like a ball and cry myself to sleep. I don't want to talk to people. Even if I do talk, what will I say?

Hey, my name is Bailey Willow. I'm a girl who isn't strong enough to keep four men from taking advantage of her body.

"You don't talk much," He says again. At this point, I'm on the verge of another mental breakdown, and I don't want to cry in front of them. I feel like an animal in a cage, scared beyond measure, and Blake is the spectator, awing at me.

Adrian gets up, and approaches me. I instantly back up, closing my eyes. I start feeling anxious, and tears start escaping my eyes.

"Look, I know you don't want to be here. But you have to stay, you have no choice. You're a witness. But don't worry, we're not going to hurt you," He says, his voice not faltering the slightest.

"My dad is waiting for me," I say, getting more frustrated by the minute at how much I have to talk.

"If he cares about your life, then he has no choice." 

I take in a deep breath, to stop myself from bursting into hysteria. If my dad gave a fuck about me, then I wouldn't be here. But I am, and that says a lot.

"School?" I refrain from sentences and resort to words.

"You'll be going to the same school," Blake tells me.

A flood of relief goes through me, and I relax a little, but not much, because I still don't feel safe. I don't even know who these people are.

What did I get myself into?

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