Fall | Janoskians fanfiction |

Chapter 11

A mixture of rain and tears streamed down my face as I continued to run. My breathing was becoming shallower and shallower, maybe because I was incredibly unfit or maybe because my whole world seemed to be crumbling around me?

It seems like no matter where I am or what I do, things always turn out shit.

I finally stood outside their house, outside his house and I shivered uncontrollably, my lips beginning to numb. Why had I even come here in the first place? 

I paced quickly up to the door and knocked on it quickly, over and over again, the ends of my hair dripping onto my shoulders. My hands fell to my side as the door opened briskly. 

An almost taken a back Jai stared at me, his mouth open slightly, “Kalli?” He said, his tone curious. He had a pair of jeans on, a grey hoodie and a beanie that snugly fit on his head. I’d forgotten how similar Luke and Jai actually looked at first glance, but the more you looked at them, the more their difference became apparent. 

“Are you okay?” He asked after noticing I hadn’t said anything. And further still I didn’t say anything. I lunged forward and wrapped my arms around his torso, my wet body colliding with his dry one. That’s when the tears began to fall again. His sweet scent immersed the air around me and his arms pulled me closer, not saying a word.

I hadn’t really spent much time with Jai or spoken to him that much if I’m honest, but in that moment I felt comfortable in his arms. 

“My Dad’s gone Jai.” I said through stifled tears. 

“Oh Kalli..” He whispered, his hand pressed to the back of my head. It seemed like he wasn’t fazed by the fact I was sopping wet.

“I’m sorry I don’t even know why I came here, it’s like it was the only place I could go, but I’ll go…” I croaked, lifting my head from his chest and rubbing the stray tears away from my eyes. 

And as I began to turn away he grabbed my hand, “Don’t be silly. It’s only me in, just stay for a bit.” He smiled, his brown eyes were warm and inviting. 

“Thank you.” Was all I could manage in a whisper. 

*

“Here take these, you’re soaking!” He smiled. He passed me a t shirt, a pair of trackies and a hoodie to put on. “I’ll look away,” he laughed. His giggle almost instantly lifting the tense air around us. He turned around and I quickly slipped off my wet clothes and put on the clean dry ones. Jai took my wet clothes and left the room before returning with two mugs filled with hot chocolate. 

“You could probably use this.” He smiled, handing me the mug. 

“I could probably use this and three shots of vodka.” I laughed, tilting my head back slightly. 

“No alcohol for you, I’ve seen what it does to you!” He joked, hitting my arm playfully. He was referring to the time we’d kissed..I’d almost nearly forgotten about that. Not the night, but our kiss. 

I felt my cheeks flush a slight pink colour as I hit him back. “I almost forgot about that!” 

“How could you forget that, I’m an amazing kisser!” He joked, sending a wink my way. I laughed along with him, what seemed like a weight almost being lifted off my chest. 

“You know I’m sorry for telling Beau about you and Luke, I-” He began, his eyes to his lap. 

“Don’t be sorry Jai! You’re their brother and sooner or later it was all going to come out. If  it wasn’t for you I don’t even know how it would have..” I told him truthfully. He exhaled deeply, as if a weight had too been lifted from his chest.

“Can I ask you something?” I asked, my tone more serious after a moment of silence. He nodded with a grin. “What did you do when your Dad left?” I asked feebly. The smile fell from his face and he bit at the corner of his lip. 

“I was only young…” He whispered. “But growing up without a Dad was tough, actually it was more than that, but I coped. I always wanted a Dad growing up. I always imagined what it would be like to have one and what he would be like and the things we’d do together, but as I got older I realised that my true Dad was never going to be like the one I’d pictured in my head, so I left it. I always had my Mum there for me though. She was like a Mum and a Dad all in one.” He smiled. 

“Wow, you’re so strong to have gone through that and still be the person you are.” I told him. He smiled, twiddling with his fingers almost out of nerves. “I just don’t know what to do..” I whispered. 

“You wanna know what I think?” He asked. I nodded, looking directly into his eyes. “Your Dad left without a warning really and that was quite frankly a pretty shitty thing of him to do, but I think you should talk to him, maybe there was a reason.” 

“Yeah, you’re right. Maybe there was a reason, but I just can’t think of one. Mum and Dad have been kind of drifting apart lately, fighting more and stuff…I’ve never really been close with my Dad though, not for years, but it still hurts. Thank you Jai, it means a lot.” I genuinely meant my words and he knew it. I lent over and placed my arms around him, squeezing him slightly. 

“How about we watch a movie? How about step brothers? I could use a laugh.” He said. 

“Sure! So could I.” I smiled, letting out a light sigh as he got up from the sofa to put the DVD in. 

He sat down beside me before placing his arm around my shoulder. I snuggled slightly into his chest, a feeling I hadn’t felt in a while creeping into my stomach. Happiness. It felt nice to have someone in my life who it actually felt like they genuinely cared.