From Dusk Till Dawn

Chapter One

  As I lie down right now, I realize how my life has turned out to be. I memorize the hardships I've been through and the good times I've had. My eyes start to roam around and scan my surroundings with much gratitude despite the peeping sound in my ears and the smell of medicine that filled the air. A device or two were attached to me and deep down I knew they were a waste of time just like the futile medicine I was taking.

In life, multiple things should have been truly cherished but were taken for granted. As sometimes when one loses something or someone close to their heart, they lose themselves with it. Falling in love, for instance, is one of the blessings that keeps out hearts alive and our souls connected, it is a feeling that must be deeply cherished no matter what the consequences turn out to be. Falling in love is one of the purest, sweetest treasures this world could give us. The term itself is metaphorical, demonstrating the physical act of suddenly falling. It may represent vulnerability sometimes. But we only reach this state when we lose the warmth of our loved ones. Other than that, falling in love is what keeps us whole. Having someone to think about when things get rough. And having them by your side to remind you that you are worthy. Knowing you are ready to abandon all you have just for the sake of this one person whom you dearly adore.

In movies and novels, it is prominently known how having similar thoughts and perspectives as your partner's is what pushes the relationship to last. Showing how that your soul-mate is sometimes the jigsaw piece you're missing and the one that makes you whole. That only when you both blend together and get consumed by each other, reciprocity can happen, leading to a successful, everlasting relationship.

In my case, however, things were different. I never believed that love completes our missing parts, instead, it proves that we are not void. That we are whole and fully capable of experiencing emotions and sacrifices.

I had only been in love, truly in love, twice. As silly as it may seem but the first girl I had ever loved was in middle school. We were both too young to even know what love was, and that was my reason for never talking to her. But the feelings I had for her were an extremely pure form of love. I remember how we used to exchange glances whenever we saw each other in the halls. We never had any classes together and I never knew her name. On our last day of school, she came to me and gave me a pink ring she used to wear all the time. "I want you to keep this," She had said in a tiny voice. In return, I gave her a painting brush. It was my first and most favorite one and I wanted her to have it. She left quickly that day without another word said between us. I remember those memories and I even put her ring in a necklace and kept wearing it for years before I put it in a velvet box and kept it safe until this day. To me, this girl's memories were a reminder of how pure and untainted love can be; it was a reminder I needed with me all the time.

The second time I fell in love was the one that lasted. She and I did have many things in common but it was not it. We were not exactly two faces of the same coin but we were alike in various things especially our love for art. On the other hand, we had numerous dissimilarities in our personality traits. But I never had to think twice while buying her a gift and vice versa. We knew each other by heart and that was enough. Our marriage simply lasted for two years because love has not a single rule to be followed. It just happens and you can feel it as it flows, taking you with it wherever.

When I first met my wife, Amy, it was in summer 2010 four years before our marriage. I was at Carolina Beach, North Carolina when we were both separately on vacation. I was there on a solo vacation to enjoy some quality time by myself away from any responsibility for a full week. And Amy was there with her friends having a week too off of everything and enjoying their time together. Somehow destiny has brought us together although we both live in Rocky Mount, North Carolina but none of us saw the other before until we each decided to have a vacation away from our mutual hometown. I still remember how she looked back then. I knew since my eyes were first laid on her, that she was exceptional. The memory of that day is still fresh in my mind. I was walking along the shore during sunset and the beach was almost empty with just a few people here and there enjoying the sunset or gathering their things to leave. The orange sky made the scene look even better than it actually was. The soft breeze of summer air washed over my face as I walked with my hands behind my back and endless thoughts on my mind. I remember I had gone to this vacation especially to clear my mind of some disagreement I'd had with my mother. My mother was the one I work for and later Amy too. She is an interior designer who is also a co-owner of a well-known company for interior design. DE Designs, taking the first letters of both her last name, Dawson and her partner's, Evanston. In addition to the fact that she knows many art dealers who have helped me and Amy to sell hundreds of paintings. So I guess you get the picture, my mum surely helped us a lot throughout our career. Even before I knew Amy, my mum was my backbone and supported me in every step in the way. My whole family was artistic, but more in the designing field. My dad was a jewelry designer and so was my aunt. My mum was an interior designer like her father. And my grandma was a fashion designer but was not the most famous although her taste was something from another world. Many of my family members were also into it especially the interior designing thing. The Dawsons were well known for their creative ideas but none was a painter. Despite that, no one objected to my wish to be a painter. They just let me be, but my mother showed the most support. Even when my father passed away she stayed strong for me and we both were always there for each other. Despite our strong bond, we have some arguments now and then. I remember that one that pushed my limits. She had objected strongly to one of my paintings because a client didn't like my choice of colors and said he wanted the colors to be more vibrant. My mum could have asked me to paint another one instead of judging my work and that was what bothered me. Besides, I remember, that month was busy with work and my stress level was rising higher each day. All lead down to me taking off to our beach house away from all the fuss. I knew that like any other argument, I and my mum would only need some time then all would return to normal. That's how it was always like. Besides that, I started taking lots of vacations whenever I felt stressed as it was my effective way to quit smoking and it indeed worked. By that time I had been nicotine free for four years and I knew I won't ever return to such habit.