From Dusk Till Dawn

Chapter Four

My thoughts returned back to the moment of Amy in the hospital bed. How can someone like her end up in a place like this? I wanted to close my eyes and reopen them to find myself back home with her in my arms. I wanted to rewind the clock, but it was not possible. The possibility of her not waking up terrified me and my anxiety got the best of me until I could no longer hold my tears. Hours passed and when the time was late, I knew I had to go back home to feed our dog, Peanut. Other than that, I would've stayed with her longer. Before leaving, I asked one of the nurses for a paper and pen to leave a note at her bedside table saying I was there and will be back soon. In case she woke up; which of course she didn't.

Our house felt solitary that night. Both Peanut and I felt the melancholy that filled the air without Amy's cheerful spirit. In Amy's absence, it felt like a house; not home anymore. The terrible thing about the pain in my chest was the fact that Amy was not with me to get me through it like she always does. Like we always do with each other whenever one of us is feeling troubled. I held Peanut close to me and kept mumbling to him about how worried I was. That night I cried on the phone to my mum while filling her up on what had happened. She told me she will call Amy's parents to inform them and I was thankful for the gesture. I knew Mr. Collins will blame me immediately without even asking for any details about the accident. Not the I would disagree, anyways. Because I, you see, was the one to blame. But with what was going on, the last thing I needed was having someone say it right to my face and keep bugging me about it. Even after all those years, you see, Amy's parents never thought any good of me despite all my attempts to win them over. Mrs. Collins somehow pretended to love me for two things: the first was the fact that Amy loved me dearly and was married to me. The second reason was the gifts and flowers I keep sending her on her birthday, mother's day, and her marriage anniversary. Well, the flowers I send on her marriage anniversary are usually for both her and Mr. Collins but I know he never gave a care about that. Sending gifts without showing up was all I could do since I knew I wasn't really welcomed in their house. Amy always used to say that I don't have to do this but I knew deep down she loved the respect I have for her parents. On the other hand, Amy's relationship with my mum was one with mutual love and respect. She always said Amy was the daughter she never had. Indeed, Amy was the kind of girl all the parents will surely love. Polite and shy, yet has a good sense of humor. Religious and responsible yet not too strict. When she does something wrong, which rarely happens, she apologizes afterward. She has unique communication skills that can get anyone to like her immediately and is extremely persuasive. She is also the kind of person who would give all she had without questioning. Her caring nature was mostly what caused many to love her. Amy is the one who is always there for everyone and would gladly get out of her way to help someone she doesn't even know. Add to this that she would agree to things she didn't like just for the sake of other people she cared about. Like going to the beach with her friends even though she didn't like it and she couldn't even swim. Of course, she would get mad sometimes and say no to many things but mostly her compassionate nature was taking over. With me, however, Amy was always more comfortable than with anyone else. Her reserved personality made me doubt her words when she first said that to me, but as I started to pay attention I realized it was true. Just like I was more myself around her. When it comes to Amy, I don't have to pretend to be someone I am not; period. Amy and I were not two people who fell in love; you can't tell it like that. Instead, we were two people who found each other, I was made for loving her and her me. I found my home and she found her safety; like that, we knew we were inseparable. The memories of her brought tears to my eyes. I could feel the warmth of my tears as they fell down my cheeks. The crying hurt my eyes for I didn't know how long I have been in this state with Peanut tugging at my shirt several times. After he realized I will not get up he crawled next to me and our sorrows mixed together in the empty house.

The next day went exactly like the first one. Meaning she didn't wake up. The difference was that this time, her parents and sister, Ellie were there. They were all extremely worried and when the doctor said only two people are allowed to enter the room at a time, her parents were the first ones to go inside. After what seemed like forever, her father exited the room and Ellie went to join her mother. The looks Mr. Collins gave me and my mum were like daggers shooting at us. But none of us had said a thing that day. Despite his loath, for me, I knew my uncombed, messy hair, and the way I looked with my red puffy eyes made him hold his tongue as to not make my case worse. Besides mum had told him Amy was driving alone and left me completely out of the story. But I knew it was just a matter of time and Mr. Collins would flip out soon. For he didn't have any other person to let it all out on.

Today we got the news that the drunk guy who's car hit Amy's, had passed away after a couple of hours from the accident so we couldn't even sue him. The moment I knew this, I also prepared myself mentally to take all the blame and those kinds of looks from Mr. Collins. Deep down I knew he was right though. Amy was only there because of me and my stupid idea of a date. I could've taken her out somewhere else but it was all my fault. My mother and I were the last in turn to go see Amy when the nurse stopped us. "I'm sorry but only one of you can see her, she needs to be given more space,"

Seeing five people on the same day in her state was a lot, we understood this. A nod from my mum and a pat on my back was all she responded with and I went with the nurse to go see my Amy. She was lying still just like the day before but her skin a little paler. It didn't take from her beauty though, she remained my gorgeous sweet Amy. My note from the day before was still there as well. Kneeling beside her bed I took her hand in mine and planted a kiss on it. I let the feeling of her soft skin consume my thoughts as I buried my face beside her with my hand still caressing hers with tenderness. "Don't leave me, please." Was all I kept muttering hoarsely to her. I stayed in that position for what seemed like a lifetime before the same nurse from earlier came to me to inform me I can't stay any longer. Before leaving I made sure to leave her another note saying I was there and will come to visit daily.

It went like this for 16 days. Me visiting every day to see she was still unconscious. Her parents came daily too and sometimes her friends were there as well. My mum on the other hand had to move in with me to take care of Peanut when I was too busy weeping about Amy. She somehow managed to take care of her business and me at the same time. Throughout the 16 days, Mr. Collins and I stayed the night many times and had small talks here and there. For the first time, we had sat together having tea, which was something I never thought possible. We even talked about sports and politics a few times and we seemed to agree on a lot of things. "I just want what's best for her, and I never thought it was you or the painting career she was after," He had told me once. I understood his point genuinely and was grateful that finally, we were starting to get somewhere. He was starting to accept my presence in their lives.