(Marcus): Have you told your friends about me?
He continued kissing my neck while we were laying on the bed at his hotel room.
We just made out.
But for a moment I felt like he wanted more.
(Me): My bestie is happy when I am happy. That's the only thing that matters.
(Marcus): Olivia?
(Me): Yes?
He kissed me on my chest for one last time and then he looked at me.
(Marcus): Have you ever been like... afraid after you heard the rumours about me?
(Me): Why should I?
I lied.
And he knew.
Yes, his bad reputation was always on my mind. Especially then, while we were making out.
I didn't want to move on.
I don't feel ready. And I don't trust him either.
(Marcus): Why are you lying?
I couldn't say anything.
He stood up and then sighed.
(Marcus): That's crazy.
(Me): It's not like that, Marcus.
I stood up too.
He didn't move.
(Marcus): Don't lie.
(Me): I like you and I know so do you, but-
(Marcus): But what?
(Me): I'm insecure.
(Marcus): I'm not. And you know why? Because I trust you.
(Me): It's not the same.
(Marcus): Oh yeah I forgot. Bad reputation.
(Me): It's NOT only a reputation. It's the truth about who you are!
He closed his eyes.
(Marcus): You're right. Almost.
(Me): I didn't want to offend you.
(Marcus): You didn't. I know these rumours are true. But you forgot that I was acting like that with other girls only.
(Me): What do you mean?
He kissed my lips softly.
(Marcus): It's different with you. That's the only thing I can say. Now it's your choice if you believe that.
He kissed me again.
(Me): Why? What was the thing you didn't like about other girls?
(Marcus): They're not you.
(Me): You're just trying to make me feel better.
He smiled and then hugged me.
(Marcus): Or maybe I'm crazy about you.
(Me): Stop.
He smiled and then look me in the eyes.
I fell for him even more when he does this.
(Marcus): I want to make you mine.
(Me): I'm already yours.
(Marcus): Yeah mentally.
(Me): What else?
He was ready to reply but someone knocked on the door.
(Marcus): Damn it.
He sighed and then opened the door.
It was Kylie with a boy.
(Kylie): WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?
That boy and Kylie came inside.
(Boy): Is that her?
Marcus nodded.
(Me): And you are?
(Boy): His brother.
(Me): You have a brother?
That boy smiled.
He was as handsome as his brother.
(Martinus): I'm Martinus.
(Me): Nice to meet you, I'm Olivia.
Marcus wrapped his arm around me and kissed my lips.
Kylie was ready to die that moment.
She couldn't even breathe.
(Martinus): What's happening between you two?
Marcus smiled.
(Kylie): Go. We. Now. Right.
She grabbed my arm and left the room.
We went to our place and she started panicking out.
(Kylie): AM I FUCKING DREAMING?
I smiled.
(Me): No, you're not.
(Kylie): THEN WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?
(Me): We were just talking and then we made out. I don't know it just happened.
(Kylie): I mean HOW? You two stopped talking like- one month ago?
(Me): Yeah but feelings last.
(Kylie): Feelings? Are you sure about that?
(Me): He does have feelings. And I trust him.
She was so worried. Her face was red and she could barely speak.
(Kylie): Olivia... If you trust him then so do I. Well wait no I'll never trust him. The thing I wanna say is that I trust YOU. And I know you won't do anything stupid.
(Me): Yeah I won't.
(Kylie): Good. So now tell me. What did you do in his room?
(Me): Nothing we just made out.
(Kylie): Olivia look-
(Me): No no no don't.
(Kylie): Wait just listen to me. I know you trust him and maybe his faithful but don't forget about something... He's two years older.
(Me): I know and this is not a problem.
(Kylie): It is, actually. You know.. well.. his 'needs' are different.
(Me): Just say it, Kylie.
(Kylie): HE'S A FUCKING 18-YEAR-OLD BOY AND HE WANTS TO FUCK YOU.
She closed her eyes.
I was speechless.
(Me): I don't agree with you.
She sighed.
(Kylie): It's not only his reputation, Olivia. It's very normal for a boy of his age to think about sex.
(Me): Stop Kylie. He's here because he has feelings about me!
(Kylie): MAYBE HE DOES. BUT HE ALSO WANTS MORE. I NEVER SAID HE ISN'T IN LOVE WITH YOU. I SAID HE-
She didn't finish the sentence.
(Kylie): Look. I only want you to watch out. Okay?
(Me): Yes and don't worry. He doesn't want more.
Did I really ever believe in those words?
Of course not.
He was in love with me. And maybe he was thinking about other things too at the same time.
And it is okay, I think.
The real question is, what am I supposed to do?
