Together again ✔

9I Got This

I tensed at the sight of the large number of students filling the parking lot as I shrank back against my seat in an instinctive attempt to hide myself from the prying eyes watching our car as we pulled into an empty space.

I locked eyes with Caleb in the rear view window, a reassuring smile on his face as he seemed to notice my discomfort from where he sat in the passenger seat. Kyle was driving silently, a cold expression painted on his face as usual as he pulled the car to a stop.

"Alright, Gabs. We're going to show you to the office to get your schedule and then we'll walk you to your first class," he said, twisting around in his seat. I nodded silently, the anxiety coursing through my body stopping me from forming any words.

What if people didn't like me? What if I was bullied? What if I made a fool of myself? What if I made no friends and became a loner?

Questions of insecurities swirled around in my mind, drawing me away from the reality I was actually in, away from the safety of the car, my mind being like the ammunition for my dangerous thoughts.

But I couldn't help it. Just the realisation of what I was stepping into was enough to scare me.

A building full of rumours, hate, judgmental people, fake friends, those who probed and asked questions that may just land me in court with a Foster dad preparing to go to jail and brothers that were now disgusted with me. How was I to act? Should I try and stand out; make friends easily? Or hide in the back and not be noticed? Either way, it couldn't hide my true identity.

Broken.

Scarred.

Hated.

Disgusting.

In the end, no matter what person I tried to be, I was always going to regret it. Every descison led to undoubtable sorrow.

"Gabby? Gabriella!" the harsh voice broke me out of my thoughts, and I snapped my head over towards Kyle who had clearly been trying to get my attention.

"Sorry," I murmered.

"I said I was expecting a verbal answer," my brother snapped in return, forcing me to cast my mind back and remember how he had said they would get my schedule with me and walk me to first period.

Just as I opened my mouth to respond as requested, Caleb beat me too it. "Hold on, Kyle. Are you OK Gabby? You seemed pretty out of it just then."

I looked up into his worried face, forcing a smile that I hoped hid my realistic worries as this time I remembered to respond verbally. "Yeah. I'm fine," I said, my voice sounding wobbly to my own ears.

Both twins didn't look convinced, but didn't push it further, instead deciding to both open their car doors at the same time and announce their presence to the world like the famous models they could probably con others into thinking they were. They definitely looked the part.

Arriving in a fancy car, carrying obvious authority that showed they wanted respect, wearing ripped jeans and leather jackets, each movement making them seem confident and in control. But who was I compared to them?

This question at the end was enough for me to realise that it could have been the start of another mental spiral, so I quickly pulled myself together as best I could and, keeping my gaze downcast, also grabbed the handle and pushed open the car door, revealing myself to the entirety of the high school.

Please don't notice me. Please don't notice me.

My pleads in my mind sadly didn't stop the sight that greeted me as I raised my head to gauge the reactions of the students who had now quietened down considerably.