Long Hard Road Out Of Hell (Marilyn Manson) ON HOLD

Lunchbox

"So, Dixie, am I right by saying that you lost your parents at a very young age?"

"Yes," I nodded, looking out to the audience and down to my hands that were folded neatly in my lap. "I lost my mother when I was 12 due to black ice on the roads. The doctors said she died on impact so at least she wasn't in pain. Seen as my father wasn't around for any of my childhood, social services tried to contact him as he was still technically my only legal guardian left, however once he found out he had to look after me... He committed suicide." I paused to collect myself and heard a gasp from the audience. I looked up to the interviewer who I had forgotten the name of and said "he would rather die than look after me."

For a second he was taken aback, but regained his professional manner. "So what happened?"

"I was put into many different orphanages around the country where I stayed until I was until I was 15. Not the best years of my life if I'm completely honest. Thankfully though, the tables were soon to turn..."

3 years ago

"So," the bubbly social worker began in an excited voice, "Dixie, this is you're new room!" She opened the door to one of the many identical rooms in one of the many orphanages I've been in to reveal a spacious white walled room with nothing but a bed, chest of draws and a window to decorate it. I stepped inside lazily and dragged my suitcase behind me, not trying to look excited because I knew I'd probably move out of here in a couple of months.

"We'll leave you alone to get settled in and dinner will be served at 18:30," the social worker smiled at me with her perfect teeth and shut the door delicately. I sighed with relive and plopped my suitcase onto the bed. My first order of business was too connect my phone to my portable speaker and blare out Lunchbox by Marilyn Manson as I put up all of my posters and put all of my things away.
Once I was done I put all my piercings back in and took my hat off, revealing my mint green pixie cut and changed out of my formal clothes and put on a sarcastic t-shirt and ripped skinny jeans. You have to look "normal" when trying to find someone to let you stay at their orphanage, and something told me that two black nose rings and 5 inch platform boots wouldn't meet the requirement.

I looked at the time; 18:10. What could I do for 20 minutes? I quickly decided on putting my headphones in and listening to This Is Gospel by Panic! At The Disco as I explored the halls of this yet another orphanage. Hopefully the "I would literally like to be anywhere else but here" quote on my top would give people a hint not to talk to me. The only simple way to explain why I keep getting transferred to different orphanage is because I'm a "danger to others". Basically if someone fucks with me I'll hit them, and I guess I'm everyone's favourite target. I've never been good at controlling my anger so why start now? I know you're probably thinking that I'm some depressed adolescent that cuts herself every change she gets, but no. I'm stronger than that. I'm luckier than most people. I have a roof... Roofs over my head, food in my stomach and clothes on my back which is more than I could ever ask for. I'm not going to throw that all away. My body is perfect and I'm not going to destroy it when there are others that would kill to have the ability to walk or have all of their limbs. I'm not that selfish. Yes, I'm not in the best position right now but things could be a lot worse, and right now that's the only thing that's keeping me going.

After walking around and finding things like the public bathroom, storage closet and numerous other dorm rooms, I found myself in front of the dining room. I looked at the time and thankfully it was 18:28. I stepped inside and was greeted by an elderly lunch lady with tired eyes and smile lines.

"Hello dear, here to make some friends?" She asked politely.

"No, I was just looking for food, actually," I tried to smile back but I felt stupid so I just looked at the floor.

"Of course, silly me. Here, why don't try some of this and sit with those lovely girls over there," she handed me a bowl of what looked like vegetable soup and pointed towards three girls who were laughing way to loudly and looked like they were eating rabbit food. Um, no thanks.
I made sure the lunch lady wasn't looking and ran to a table tucked away at the back. I turned my music up to drown out everyone else and was lucky enough to eat in peace. I started to look around and saw a staff member carrying one of those metal lunch boxes. I smirked as I remembered how Marilyn had said in his book that they banned them in his school because they could be used as weapons. Maybe I could start selling contraband and make a small fortune until I got caught. That would be nice.

***

It was three in the morning and I was still awake, staring at the ceiling. I recently found out that this wasn't an orphanage but in fact a group care home. It must've been a mansion or something because this place is huge. How long had I been calling group care homes orphanages? Guess we'll never know. After my first day here all I've done is eat some watery soup and throw people dirty looks. Sometimes I wish I had friends, but I don't like to make them because I know I'll be ripped away from them in no time. I sighed heavily and buried my head in the pillow. I hadn't missed my mum this badly before. I didn't like it. It hurt. I'm starting to forget what she sounds like, what she looks like, what she smells like... I went under the covers and tried to slip off into the darkness before I felt to much.

A/N
Idk what the fuck I'm doing :///
Basically just an introduction to Dixie and some of her life.
If some of my views and opinions in this offend you I'm not going to apologise but advise you too skip those parts out or to act mature and try to see from my point of view
If you don't like any of the bands mentioned in this book you're wrong and your opinion is invalid xoxoxo