The Demon Next Door

19

"Stop crying."

Rain pattered on the car windows. It was hard not to weep in such depressing weather conditions, let alone when guilt was beating at you like you were some sort of piñata.

Kyungsoo hadn't even been aware that tears had been spilling from his eyes. He'd been staring out of the window the entire car ride, fighting to see through the thick layer of raindrops and fog with his vision.

Jongin didn't tell him why he'd come to the party in a car rather than a motorcycle, though. This was not the right time to display affection. And telling him that he bought it because he didn't want Kyungsoo to get hurt on the motorcycle would do just that.

Kyungsoo desperately tried to stop himself from releasing his emotions. The fact that he had dried up cum flaking on his face was making it quite difficult.

And Tao. Oh God, Tao. Jongin and Kyungsoo had looked for him everywhere in that damn club. It had been a more thorough investigation than that of a search for a dead body.

Kyungsoo had searched in every room, every corner, every fucking nook and cranny of that damn place. In the end, the conclusion was inevitable. And absolutely terrible.

Both Tao and Yifan were gone.

Kyungsoo hated himself from the depths of his soul. It was all his fault. It was all his fucking fault, and because of him, Tao was going to get more than hurt.

He blamed Jongin, too. If only he hadn't pulled him away from Tao, the vice president would have been in the car with him at that moment. They'd be hearing his petty complaints, but it would all be worth it.

Just the thought that he'd left Tao behind made Kyungsoo sob harder. He prayed Yifan wouldn't do anything to him. Tao wouldn't be able to take it. He'd break in two. Crack right through the middle.

Kyungsoo covered his face and let everything pour out. He knew Jongin was not appreciating the emotional display. Whatever. Kyungsoo didn't give a fuck what Jongin liked or didn't like anymore.

"Stop crying," Jongin repeated.

"I can't!" Kyungsoo roared through steaming tears. "I can't believe you did that to me! How could you do that to me?!"

Jongin chewed on his inner cheek for a moment before responding. "You'll wipe away my release and forget about it. You think I can forget what you did to me?"

"You're a bastard, Kim Jongin!" Kyungsoo managed. "You only ever think about yourself! You obviously had some sort of intentions when you became my boyfriend! You wanted something from me! Did you get what you want? Huh? Did you?!"

"I got what I wanted." Jongin reached out to switch the radio on. "And I got more than I bargained for."

Kyungsoo winced at the sound of a rock song blasting from the radio's small speakers. The noise from the drums pounding, along with the rain, wasn't making him feel any better.

To make matters worse, Jongin saw his discomfort and switched the station. The song You're So Vain came on, and Kyungsoo's guilt became unbearably overwhelming as pieces of the English in the song were deciphered in his head.

"I lost Tao there because of you," he whimpered.

"You lost him because of yourself. We're not so different, Kyungsoo. You're just as selfish as I am."

Jongin paused here to release some smoke from his cigarette.

"This relationship started out with me wanting to get in your pants. After I did, I didn't expect to have been seduced. I don't know how you did it, but I've never felt anything for anyone before. Except you. Only you. I might come across as a little possessive, as witnessed on your face, but I'd never hurt you. Not the way you hurt me."