The Demon Next Door

24

"Why don't you just die?"

"Why don't you just die?"

"Why don't you just die?"

The shock on Jongin's face didn't falter.

Through the beeping sound of rejection incessantly ringing on the other end of the line, to the fast beating of his heart, the stricken horror that formed Jongin's expression didn't melt away.

Never in his life had he expected such vulgar words to leave Kyungsoo's mouth. He'd received death threats and suggestions before, but he'd never paid attention to them. Coming from Kyungsoo, though...

Jongin managed to break himself out of his trance and press the 'end call' button with nimble fingers. He shook violently, dropping his phone onto the carpeted floor when his digits chose to betray him.

As soon as it heard the breaking of the phone's screen shattering on impact, Jongin's heart suffered the same fate. Dents and hairline cracks snaked all over Jongin's tormented organ to the point of immoral combustion.

The tears came uninvited. Jongin rarely cried; this time his emotions opted to take a most foreign route.

He covered his face to stifle the sobs, already embarrassed and angry, especially at himself. He knew this would happen. He knew from the start that Kyungsoo forgiving him would be short lived.

He'd seen this coming. People don't just forgive and forget. It's not human nature. There is always a lingering feeling of anger or desire for revenge. Jongin knew Kyungsoo hadn't been an exemption from the fact.

Jongin wasn't sure how long he'd been crying, but by time he was done, his throat was parched and voice was hoarse. He felt completely dry, like a plant that hadn't been watered for days and was wilting.

He slid off of the council meeting table and stood on the floor with wobbly legs. His head spun from confusion. Choking back more sobs, he picked up his fallen phone and left the room.

His backpack felt heavier than it should have. Each step he took resembled treading on burning coal. Everything around him was caving in, and he didn't care anymore if he was caught between debris and didn't make it out alive.

If he didn't make it out alive...

It would make Kyungsoo happy. If Jongin wasn't around anymore, it would land a smile on Kyungsoo's face. Jongin's thoughts went on a rampage from that possibility.

If I hadn't moved here, none of this would have ever happened. Kyungsoo would still be student body president. He would have never lost his friends, his family's respect, or his place in life. If I didn't exist, Kyungsoo would be happy. If I didn't exist...

Jongin pushed open the front door of the school and walked out, not even hesitating. There was no reason for him to finish the school day now.

He forced himself home in spite of the desire to fall onto his knees and cry onto the sidewalk. All the way home, Jongin's mind swarmed with those vile thoughts.

Suicide. Would his death really change Kyungsoo's life for the better? Had Kyungsoo simply said that out of reflex, out of terror from the disease Jongin had infected him with? Or...had he been serious?

Jongin certainly wasn't taking it as a joke. Kyungsoo had sounded so sure when he'd told Jongin to die; almost sadistic. Besides, it took a lot to get Kyungsoo to say something like that, and Jongin pretty much hit the nail right on the head.

If I didn't exist...

Jongin ventured in between his house and Kyungsoo's. He dropped his backpack onto the grass beneath Kyungsoo's room and began climbing his way up the side of the house.