𝕀'𝕝𝕝 𝕎𝕒𝕚𝕥 // ~switz~

9

Being single hadn't turned out quite the way Eric had thought. Over the first few days he felt incredibly guilty and miserable, he just couldn't forget the pain in her eyes when she said 'I loved you too,' and he felt he likely never would. For the better part of two weeks, he spent most nights in front of his computer, editing for hours on end between bong rips and beers. Music blasting in his headset while his eyelids were heavy, letting his work consume him. He wouldn't stop until it was finished, staying awake until four or five am, even sometimes falling asleep to the songs of morning birds. On the nights he didnt sleep until the afternoon of the next day, he sat at the breakfast table or the couch, just watching Cam. While he did dishes, walked across the room, or when he talked, he just studied him; longing to forget all about Bee and climb into his arms. Waking up in the evenings was the worst part, forty-five minutes to an hour of lying in bed, thinking of what to do. How to keep his mind off of her, off of the trouble he'd caused, the pain and confusion. Admittedly something he'd had fallen into was drinking.. alot of drinking. A few shots in and he didn't feel so guilty any more, didn't feel so angry and digusted with himself. And most importantly, he didn't feel so distant from Cameron, able to actually talk with him, the way they did before.

Eric rubbed his eyes, pushing his chair away from the desk. Yawning, he stretched his arms as far as they would go. '3:48' the digits glowed on his alarm clock. Reaching back to the desk he put his computer into rest mode before standing, stretching his stiff muscles yet again. His eyelids heavy, he trudged over to his bedside table retrieving the rolling tray and grinder. He walked over to his bedroom door, feeling as though he was forgetting something. He glanced around his room, lit with blue led lights. Making a small affirmative noise when he realised he'd left his bong containing stale water on his desk. 'Better do it now so I dont forget,' he thought picking it up carelessly and swinging it between his fingers as he walked over to his door. He crept down the hallway past Mason's room and into the dark living room that smelled of pizza due to that night's dinner. Which Eric had refused, 'I'm not hungry,' he'd explained the umpteenth time, shutting his door on a concerned Tobi. That had been the third night in a row Swagger had skipped dinner. Feeling guilty, Eric shivered a bit as he stepped into the kitchen. He took the stem and bowl from the bong before dumping the dirty water into the sink. "Ugh" he whispered, shaking drops from the top. He sat it on the counter, scooting it away from the edge a bit. He turned the faucet to wash his hands when the back patio door slid open, startling him so much so that his hands had begun to shake. He snapped around quickly to see a tall hooded figure stepping into his kitchen. He closed the door behind him before pulling his hood down, sighing and scratching his head. "H- hey," Eric said timidly from the sink. Fitz jumped, his head whipping over toward Eric and squinting at the dark spot. He clutched his chest, "Fuck, you scared me," he said breathlessly. Eric chuckled tiredly, "you scared me too," he said crossing his arms over his chest. "Sorry.. I couldn't sleep, so I went for a smoke." Eric nodded, "same." Fitz nodded along, starting into the living room. "Hey, you ok?" Eric asked quietly from behind him. Fitz turned around to face him, searching for Eric's face in the dark. "Shouldn't I be asking you that?" Eric blushed, letting one arm fall down, held at the elbow by his other hand. "What do you mean?" He responded cluelessly. Picking up his bong to rinse it, just to have something to do. "Eric, this is the first time I've seen you in two days.. and we live in the same house." The words hurt Eric in a strange way, as though he were letting Cam down. "I'm sorry.." he said, turning the water back off and sitting his piece back down after not having done anything with it. "Dont be sorry.." he sighed, "just.. talk to me. Please." Cameron pleaded, his voice filled with concern, Eric figured he would have cried had he seen Cameron's face. "Come smoke with me?" He asked lowly. Fitz didn't say anything, but Eric watched as his silhouette walked over to him. Without warning he felt his presence standing inches from him, his scent filling Eric's nose. Fitz picked up the tray from the counter and walked back over to the door, leaving Eric to hurry after him. 'Full Moon,' he smiled taking in the night sky, after not having been outside in two weeks. He pulled out a chair from the table and sat down, noticing the two roaches on the tabletop. "Want me to roll?" Cam asked, sitting across from him. "Sure." Eric replied, shrugging. Now in the moonlight, he could make out Cam's face, his dark circles seemingly darker. He wore a slight frown as he took a paper from the pack. "So, when's the last time you ate?" Cameron glanced up at him, screwing the top off of the grinder. Eric shrugged, "last night I think." He sat the grinder down in two pieces, "something proper," he pushed further. "Yesterday probably." Eric answered untruthfully, wishing to calm the taller's fears. Cameron shook his head, "you're lying." Eric scooted his chair a bit to be facing the pool more, away from Cam. "What about you? What's keeping you up, hmm?" He prodded, looking back to the taller who was now filling the paper with grinded weed. He sighed, "well someone close to close to me is going through alot right now.. and he wont let me help. I can only watch." He pinched the corners together and rolled it up. "Cam, that's not fair.." Eric said lowly, "you don't how badly I-" he bit his tongue and shook his head, "nevermind." He said quickly, looking out at the pool. Cameron licked the joint sealed and took out his lighter, having to stretch out to retrieve it from his front pocket. He lit it, taking two hits before passing it to Eric.

Not much was said between the two, Cameron would ask questions and Eric would answer as truthfully as possible without worrying the taller. Once the roach had burned his fingers three rotations he snuffed it out on the table, tossing it back onto his tray. Low on weed he snatched up Cameron's as well placing them with his smaller one. Fitz pushed himself up from the arms of his chair. "Fuck, I'm stoned," he sighed, rubbing his eyes. "You off to bed?" Eric questioned quietly from his seat. Fitz nodded, "yeah, I guess I'd better."  He started to leave Eric, a sudden burst of desperation and maybe loneliness washing over him, he blurted out quickly, "Cou- could I come?.." Cameron looked back to him, "Of course you can Eric." Swag blushed, picking up his tray. "Let me put this away first." Fitz nodded, "ok, just come in. I'm going to change and get in bed." Eric blushed at the thought of sharing a bed with the taller. But he needed the comfort, the warmth, he couldn't bare being alone another night. He nodded following him inside and jogging down the hallway to his bedroom as Fitz trudged up the stairs. He cracked his door open enough to sit his tray on the table next to the door before shutting it quietly and walking back into the living room. With butterflies in his stomach he hopped up the stairs, too excited to consider being quiet. He knocked twice quietly with his knuckle before opening his door and stepping in. Closing the door behind him, he walked over to the bed taking in Fitz's room. Absolutely tidy, despite the jeans he'd been wearing moments ago sitting crumpled next to the bed. Heat rising to his cheeks slightly he pulled back the cover carefully, before sitting down with a light creak and pulling his legs up and under the covers. He looked over to Fitz who was lying on his side, staring at the space Eric now occupied. He rolled over on to his back and stretched out his right arm, making a come here gesture. Hesitantly Eric scooted over to Cameron, before resting his head on his chest. Cam wrapped his long arm around the shorter before kissing the top of his head. "I've really missed you." He whispered, making Eric blush slightly. "I'm sorry," he replied. Fitz rested his other arm over Eric before squeezing gently, "please don't shut me out anymore, ok?"  Eric shook his head, "I wont. Promise." Silence filled the room before, "Eric.. I- I love you.." Warmth grew in Eric's chest, his eyes watery, he caught his breath, "I love you Cam." Cameron tightened his grip, pressing his face into Eric's hair. It didn't take long for the sleep deprived pair to drift off together, listening to the soothing hums of the other's body.

1500 words this time for you patient babes ❤