Patience

31.Hazelnut

"Hazel Rose Vance Scott" He mumbles again.

I start turning cold under the warm water when he starts speaking.

Thousands of thought start flooding me within a fraction of second.

A woman.

A Vance.

A Scott.

Just by the way he uttered the name makes me scared. I know I'm in for some revelation.

" I used to call her Hazelnut " His eyes glazing over under the shower . One could clearly differenciate the water running through this open eyes and his pooling tears mixing.

He pauses. I wait for him to gather his words at which he is clearly struggling.

I raise my hands and take the shower gel and slather some on his chest and start lathering it up massaging in circles. This visibly eases his tense shoulders, but just a little .

" My sister.....My little baby sister..... She was so precious.....
Kind, even being so little...." He says pausing at every sentence, gathering courage along the along the ways.

It breaks me to see him like this, but I wait for him to open up at his own pace. So I just keep rubbing circles with the lather.

He has a sister?

" She was everything for me. Being her brother brought me joy. From the day she was born she brought light to our life......... I was a brat Tess, I still am I guess" he chuckles a bitter one. " From the day I was born, I was taught to dictate, order, dominate. I was taught power, money, control, bussiness. I was a little boy yet I was an ass. "

He breathes pausing, " But the moment mum , placed her tiny form in my arms and said that I was her big brother, everything changed. She was the best gift I got on my birthday. I wanted to protect her, be around her always, be responsible for her. "

I can't help but be awed at with how much adoration she speak of his sister. He is so soft at at his heart.

"She made me grow from a little brat rolling in money, to a big brother who wanted to grow big and ideal for her. And that is exactly what I did. I took it on myself to be her protector when she grew up. Even when she was just seven... I was fourteen. Because somehow even so young I knew that we needed constant security from the world. "

" Hazel always asked me, when she wanted something. Knowing I wouldn't deny her pouty face.
That is why she asked me to go the park for our birthday. I didn't agree at first you know, I knew we were kids. It's wasn't safe there, in that public park. But she cried an entire hour when I said no. I couldn't she her tears.
She wouldn't drink her milk, throwing tantrum. So I gave up and promised to take her. "

He shuts his eyes off, " I took her to the park with her toys.. It was a good day. Believe me." He frantically says holding my shoulders.

" She was absolutely happy..... Running around in her little toes with her pink candy, eating cakes. And I followed her every step like a shadow. She was my responsiblity. She was my baby sister. "

Every time he says was my fear solidifies with the possible outcome. But I remain silent, grateful of his opening up to me. Lending him support by jist standing there.

" We spent the entire day together there, loosing track of time. Our butler warned us about mum worrying and the impending birthday party,so we decide to go back. Even she was tired. Her little self giving up. We walked towards our car across the road. We settled in but she remembered that she left her doll she loved at the park. She didn't demand to get it back. But I couldn't looks at the pouty little face sad. For me, if she wanted something, she gets it. Anyhow......... So I went back to get it leaving her with our driver ....."