And you can have clout too. Here's how >,
All you need to do is join the Jesus Club! It cost you nothing but the desire to do good.
Wow.. That doesn't seem to hard I hope because it will come naturally back to you once you join our friendly little community.
You will start wanting to be kind to others and considerate of they're needs instead of thinking only of yourself.
You will want to know the secrets hidden in the scriptures exclusively for the Jesus Club members only. Anyone can read the good book but only the saved will understand it more fully.
Once you get back to heaven then Hey, who knows.. Maybe Jesus will give you a private tour of the Palace Himself. What a trip that would be. High Five Jesus my best friend..
It is sooo simple. Just ask Jesus if you can join and if every part of your being down to the last molecule has the want to. Well then He will open the main gate and let you in. Done deal!!!
You just started a new life and Jesus will forgive all your old sins and horrible mistakes if you just ask him and tell him you are very sorry for being a miscreant louse and that you want to do better.
That's really tough to do hugh. Not!!!! Just do it and see what takes place yourself. I promise you, (though humbling it might be), it does not hurt one bit.
Think about how good it feels when you sneeze. Or take a good morning stretch and that good fuzzy feeling that comes with it. I can even go so far and say, (if you don't mind), the all time greatest good feeling of an orgasm..
These are the type of minor good feeling that God gave us on earth and He does these things because he loves us. But what you have in store back in heaven is way beyond our imagination as far as good feelings go.
I tell you these things because I don't want you to be afraid to join our group. Millions have joined and they will all tell you the same thing. That's Gods they're bosom buddy friend and Jesus is they're big cuddly brother and boy can He stir up the sawdust at the barn dances.
Do these people sound like the type you should be afraid of? I hope not..
The semi-sad part is that God is about to end all this and come and pick up His Club members and then it will be Hell to join the Club.
Though know one, not even the angels know the hour He will come back, scripture has fulfilled nearly all the pre-written prophesy's and this points to the days we are in now.
So please think hard about what I have been trying to teach you, but do so quickly and then muster up the nerve and just ask before you loose out on the offer entirely. He and we do Not want to leave you behind.
Something to remember while your thinking it over. Unlike the other place, if you do take the hand of the Man who offers you eternal life, you can always turn around and leave should you decide that heaven and the Glory of God is not for you..
God will not force you to love Him. But He sure as hell loves You..
From your local drug addicted, pot smoking Jesus freak.. God bless and keep you and yours safe.
