Stargazing

Chapter 10

Midnight's POV :
It's odd how when you wake up in the morning you feel completely different emotions that what you were feeling before you went to sleep.

Last night I was happy and I had turmoil but this very morning I felt sad. Let me tell you why. Today's my dad's birthday, September 18th. Dad would've been 40 today if he didn't lose his life.

I got up out of bed, it was only 9. I had classes only at 1 and I knew Star was already out working as she just got a job. So no one was home I guess, I haven't even seen mom since I went to the Wests and I don't think I'm ready to see her.

I made my way downstairs and I smelt waffles. Is Star home? I questioned myself. As I walked into the kitchen mom was standing there.

She had a happy smile on her face. "Good morning honey" she said all chirpy. "Morning" I replied. Mom and I have yet to speak about that man being in our house but she was acting all nonchalant, I didn't dare bring the topic up, I was waiting for her.

I took a seat at the kitchen island as she set down a plate of waffles in front of me. "Thank you" I said a sad smile playing on my lips. "What's got you in a good mood?" I asked her. "I'm going on a date tonight" she shrieked.

My fork dropped out of my hand. My stomach dropped. I know it's been two years but she's moving on so fast. Also we had a tradition, every year on dad's birthday we would cook dad's favorite meal and eat together as a family.

"Mom you don't know what today is?" I asked tears blurring my vision. "Yes September 18th" she forgot! "You forgot about his birthday!" I shrieked.

Her face suddenly went pale at the realization of what I was talking about.

"You don't even care anymore!" I yelled.
"I hate everything in the entire universe, I hate it all!" I yelled as I ran to my room.

I made sure that once I was in the room I locked the door. I heard mom's footsteps rushing up the steps. She stood infront of my door knocking on it.

"Honey let's talk please, come one I haven't been paying attention to the dates, I'm sorry, we can still do our tradition" she said sadness laced in her voice. She was guilty I knew that much and I knew I was being over dramatic but you don't just forget something so important.

"It's okay mom go on your date, I'll do this tradition by myself" I said my voice sounding choked.

"Honey no we c-"
"I said it's okay mom just leave, please" I begged her. She stood still for a while until her footsteps were heard in the far distance.

I cried so hard, my chest rising and falling. I had to get out of here. I quickly grabbed clothes and took a shower.

Everything happened so fast. I showered and got dressed and then I was running down the stairs, mom was sitting at the bottom of the stairs and when she heard me come down she got up but I ignored her and ran past her.

"Honey please, please don't leave" she begged me but I didn't listen. I grabbed my car keys and sprinted to my car. I unlocked it and got in and locked it once more so mom couldn't open the doors.

Tears blurred my vision but I wiped them away. I knew I wasn't in the right state of mind to drive but I turned the car on anyway and sped out of the driveway.

I drove and drove. There's one place in the world that would make me calm right now and I drove to it.

I was sitting in the parking lot of the beach, this was the place my dad and I spent most of our summer days when Star was in school and mom was in work.

I quickly got out of the car and made my way over to the sand. I found a quiet spot where I could be alone and I just sat down. I stared out and the beautiful waters and smiled. "I miss you dad" I whispered.

I was stuck in my own world. Wondering where things started going wrong. Was mom finally over dad? Had she never been happy with him? Why'd she move on so quick? All these thoughts were running around until an euphoric feeling hit me.

It felt like I was floating, it felt as if I was the only person in the world. A thought crossed my mind but it was weird and I didn't pay much attention to it. I was waiting for the feeling to pass and it did but only for a few seconds and it was back.

Hitting me like a ton of rocks pulling me into an abyss of euphoria, taking me far beyond the universe and igniting something in my soul.

"So this is your thinking place?" his voice said. I turned to him and only one thought crossed my mind.

'Mate'

I shook my head not understanding how this could even happen this early. It didn't make sense.

I brought myself out of my daze and stared at Zefan." Yes you could say that" I replied. He sat down next to me.

His warmth of his body immediately engulfing me in an endless cycle of needing to be closer to him. He was here to listen, he wanted to know what was going on.

"It feels as if she's forgotten about him" I started. I looked at him but he was staring ahead. "It's his birthday today and she forgot that, we usually do this family tradition and she forgot that, it feels as if his not important anymore" I said.

"There was a time where I couldn't imagine life without him but now I'm having to live it and I hate every single bit of it, I hate being here without him, I'd rather be with him right now than here" I said.

"And how would that make your mom feel,what about Star, here is so many people that care about you, don't ever forget that" Zefan said. "I just think that your mom is also trying to deal with this on her terms, you have to sit down and talk to her about the way you feel" he stated.

"Why, so that she could just push my feelings to the side?" I said while rolling my eyes. "You're not the only one that's broken Midnight, you lost a father, one that's been with you your whole life, your mom's lost her soulmate, someone she grew to love every day, imagine how she feels" Zefan said.

What he said made sense and something clicked inside me. Soulmate? Something about that had to be in the book father left me. See in the last few weeks of my father being alive he gave two books. The one was in the metal box and the other was under my bed, it was a book I was yet to open but father had said when I feel that euphoric feeling, it was the right time to open up that book.

I was feeling that euphoric feeling so I knew what I had to do.

It's funny how much someone can actually mean to us.