Bloodloss: An Alec and Magnus (Malec) Fanfiction

Chapter 21

Catarina stands before me, her hands scratched from the battle and a deep red cut on her forehead, bright against the blue of her skin. Her complexion is light, colour drawn with energy, but her eyes are gentle, bright and smiling. The room is full of people – praetorians, the other Downworlders, shadowhunters – but it’s so quiet that you could hear a pin drop. My father gave Catarina permission to lift my curse. Magnus is at the other side of the room, worryingly pale, clearly apprehensive. I can see my family, Anya and Matt, Jordan and Maia, Indy, Clary and Simon. Unlike when my curse was placed on me, I know many of the people in the room are here to support me.

“I’m so proud of you, Alexander.” Catarina tells me.

“Thank you.” I say quietly. “But, I have a question. Why couldn’t you just have lifted my curse in the first place?”

“Because I’d sworn to assist the Clave. If I’ve sworn, I can’t go back on it, I’m not able.” She smiles at me gently, tapping my hand. “No matter how much I want to.”

I nod.

“But I was right, wasn’t I? You’re not alone. You thought you’d lost everything and everyone. But look,” she gestures to the crowd of people, waiting anxiously to see if my curse will be lifted, their faces hopeful. “You’ve never had more people love you, care about you.”

I smile slightly, though I’m petrified for what’s ahead.

“Are you ready?” she asks.

“Yes. I’m ready.” I say quietly.

The sparks start swirling, faster and faster, around Catarina’s hand. She presses her hand flat against my chest, over my heart, and I feel the tingle of sparks on my skin.

“This might hurt a little.” Catarina warns and closes her eyes, sparks flying from her fingers and into my chest.

I grit my teeth as Catarina’s sparks vibrate under my skin, sending shocks of pain coursing through me. I fight not to pull back as the sparks find their way to my heart, like fingers squeezing it and digging in their nails. I clench my fists, knotting my fingers into the bottom of my gear jacket. A scream rises in my throat as Catarina hunts for the curse in my heart, and I swallow back the yell. Suddenly, there’s a freezing coldness in my chest that makes me shake. I didn’t think I could feel cold, but I’m shivering now. Catarina smiles at me, nodding. Then she slowly draws her hand back from my chest, pulling out the cold in my heart, a wonderful heat swelling in its place.

I press a hand to my heart and it flutters briefly under my touch before falling still once again.

“It’s done.” Catarina says.

The silence is deafening, leaving a sound like the roaring ocean in my ears. I don’t even notice I’m moving until I’m halfway across the room. I don’t have to push past people; they’re already parting like the Red Sea. My chest aches, making me wince a little with each step. However, it’s a dull ache, already fading, not like the sharp pain of my curse. I feel so light.

When I reach him, Magnus isn’t smiling as I thought he’d be. But compared to the look on his face, a smile would seem almost disappointing. His face is paled – most likely due to the wound on his hip, wrapped in layers of bandages – but his gold-green cat’s eyes glimmer, bright in his blanched face.

I stop a metre or so in front of him, almost afraid to get closer, my entire body feeling shaky. My bones feel like they’re made of water, and I stand straight to stop myself shaking. I don’t know why I’m so nervous, but I haven’t seen Magnus for so long. There’s just so much riding on this. What if it’s not like we imagine? What if Magnus decides he didn’t miss me that much, that he doesn’t really want me back that much?

I close the gap between us and look up into his face. I always thought that when the curse was lifted, and I could finally touch Magnus again, it would be frantic and fast, all hard kisses and desperate hugs. But this isn’t. It’s careful and almost achingly slow. Our foreheads rest together, the tip of my nose against his. I can feel a slow smile spreading across my face. I have nothing to worry about, because Magnus and I are as one. Finally reunited. How could I have thought he’d love me any less?

“I’ve missed you.” I whisper.

“I’ve missed you too.” He replies softly, his breath stirring my hair.

I shift then, pressing my mouth gently to his, so softly we’re barely touching. But I can feel each place out mouths touch like electricity rushing through me. It’s like I’ve been half-awake this past month, and I needed Magnus to bring me to life.

There’s a cheer and the crowd breaks into a spontaneous round of applause. I laugh against Magnus’s mouth and feel him smile. We pull apart and I turn, keeping one hand slung around his uninjured hip. I press my hand to his side gently, and grin at the Praetorians, who’re cheering and clapping loudly. In amongst the yells are Izzy and Simon, Clary and Jace, Jordan and Maia, all smiling brightly. Izzy’s laughing and clapping her hands together and I chance a look at my parents. They smile and I return the gesture gratefully. Then I turn my attention back to Magnus, whose hand is resting on my shoulder.

“So, are you coming back home to the apartment?” he asks, sounding expectant.

He looks so nervous, as if there’s some doubt in his mind to my answer. I want to quell any fears he has that I’d give a second thought to coming back home. My home is my home, and I want to go back more than anything.

I nod.

“Wild curses wouldn’t keep me away.” I smile, and he heaves a sigh of relief I find so endearing that I drag him into a hug.

He holds on tightly, knotting his hands into the bottom of my gear jacket, and I know what he’s thinking, because I’m thinking the same about him; ‘I’m never letting you go again.’