are you mine? | jakehoon

chapter 2

the alarm clock's obnoxious beeping snapped jake out of his thoughts, he quickly slammed his hand on the button to turn the goddamn thing off. it was time to go to school. jake groaned and wiped his wet eyes, fuck was it going to be awkward seeing sunghoon there with all the texts and snaps jake's been ignoring.

he'd refused to go to school the remaining days of the week after their phone call. the only thing he'd done was stalk sunghoon's social medias, cry and watch a bunch of movies. somehow something in the movies always managed to remind him of him, causing jake to cry over and over again.

honestly he did not want to go to class today either, but his mother had made it pretty clear that he had to, no staying home. jake sat up on his bed, staring holes into the wall, feeling numb and feeling too much at the same time.
would sunghoon beg for him back like he'd done a couple times before? would jake take him back like he'd done all those times? he knows he shouldn't, should've learned by now but it's so hard when sunghoon kisses him like he really does love him, sets jake's skin alight with just a slight touch, when his warm eyes just looks like home.

walking to school from his home felt like it took forever with the way jake was kicking every rock in his way and moving at a snail's pace. he felt anxious, didn't know what to expect. would everyone know already? would he have to hang with him today considering they had common friends? jake sighed and passed through the school gate while running a hand through his black hair, fingers freezing. he's glad he wore a puffer jacket today at least. jake pulled out his phone and connected it to his headphones while entering the building.

and I thought I was yours forever
maybe I was mistaken but I just cannot manage to make it through the day
without thinking of you lately

the lamps in the building were blinding to his eyes, people were chattering and going to their classes. walking up the stairs, an arm suddenly came to wrap around his shoulders.
"goodmorning jakey!" ej smiled brightly, messy wavy hair covering his eyes a little bit.
"morning, did you style your hair?" jake snickered and ruffled the male's hair.
they entered their classroom.
"i did, you noticed? the wind messed it all up on the way here though! i spent so much time on it!" he whined and flung his head back dramatically.
"it doesnt look that bad though, the messiness is kind of charming."
"don't lie," ej laughed as he took his seat behind jake.
"i'm not-" jake was cut off by nicholas popping up at their side.
"guys jay is having a thing at his house tonight, we're going right?"
"a thing? on a monday?" ej questioned, tilting his head.
"yeah, you know some weed, some drinking, just us and his buddies. just chill."
his buddies meant sunghoon was going to be there, jake really did not want to deal with the awkwardness of them being in the same room.
"i don't think i'll go" jake muttered, resting his cheek in his palm.
ej and nicholas looked at him at the same time.
"why not?"
"i'm not really feeling it today."
ej looked at him with pleading eyes.
"it's so much more fun when you're there though.."
jake smiled,
"i'll go next time, i have some stuff i need to finish at home today."
nicholas frowned.
"are you sure that's why?"
ej kicked his leg.
"i mean- ouch! what?? uh-" nicholas coughed.
"you guys know, don't you?" jake sighed and slammed his head on the table.
ej stroked his hair, nodding.
"yeah, you don't need to talk about it though. just know you can be honest with us and we're here for you."
jake smiled and closed his eyes.
"thank you."

his classes felt like they were longer than usual, jake couldn't focus and barely got anything done. after a while loud chatter and laughter erupted from the hallways and disturbed his classmates as the other class passed by their open door. jake ran a hand through his hair and just as he glanced at the door sunghoon passed by, laughing, arms wrapped around some guy jake weren't aware he knew.
they must've gotten to know each other after their breakup.

why was he not enough?

suddenly jake felt cold, missed sunghoons touch, missed his laugh, missed being the one next to him. the room felt awfully suffocating and now jake just wanted to go home.

finally.
the clock hit 3 pm and jake packed together his stuff as quickly as he could, just shoving everything in his backpack. he almost ran down the stairs and out of the building, palms sweaty and feeling dizzy. his anxiety really had been acting up the last few days. the chilly winds that hit him as soon as he stepped outside helped clear his mind a little. it was very gray outside, foggy and gloomy. the sun was nowhere in sight. he pulled up the collar of his jacket trying to cover as much of his lower face as possible.
"snow will probably start falling any day now." jake mumbled to himself as he started walking home.
as he could see his house in sight a car slowed down by his side and rolled down a window.
"hey jake, haven't seen you around the rink for a while now, you been busy?"
it was their town's hockey team manager dani. sunghoon's manager. and also jake's former manager.
he had played hockey all through his childhood, it was either hockey, figure skating or hunting here in their small town covered in snow most of the year. that's how he got to know sunghoon, they played on the same team until jake injured his leg and had to quit.

"yeah, been pretty busy with homework and stuff, you know how it is." jake smiled and adjusted the strap of his backpack.
the manager, dani, nodded.
"yeah, it's tough being a teenager, huh?" he laughed and continued,
"with hockey season starting up i better see you on the stand cheering for sunghoon, the guy plays so much better when you're there."
jake laughed awkwardly and rubbed his nape.
"yeah-"
"we need to go all the way this season, we need to win every single match. it's going to be difficult but i believe we'll make it happen. that's why you need to be there, for the sake of the star of the team." dani looked at him expectantly.
"ah, yeah yeah, i'll be there."
dani laughed, told him he'll stop rambling now, said bye and drove off.
jake groaned and threw his head back, just staring up at the sky for a few minutes before heading inside his house.

jake threw himself onto his bed and let out the biggest sigh ever. how come he can't even go one day without hearing or seeing or thinking of sunghoon?
he rolled to his back and picked up his phone.
17 unread text messages.
he still hadn't had the courage to read them. he was honestly afraid to. didn't know what to say.
'it's okay, let's forget about it?'
'it's not okay, let's just not see each other anymore?'
'i miss you?'
jake didn't want to be stupid and just go back to him again, but how could he live without him? but sunghoon had looked perfectly fine earlier.... without him. with someone else.
all these texts, but not a single call. sunghoon hadn't came looking for him either, did he even regret kissing someone else? or was this what he wanted?
his heart felt like it was shattering.
jake couldn't stop the tears threatening to escape, his body shook as he cried.
until everything went black.

jake opened his eyes, blinking a few times before slowly raising his head from the pillow. he fell asleep. he grabbed his phone to check the time.
1 am.
he noticed a text from his mom, was going to press it when his phone started ringing and vibrating abruptly, he accidentally pressed accept in like a millisecond. jake just stared at his phone, call ongoing.
sunghoon.
why all of sudden?
jake sat up on the bed.
his heart was racing as he raised the phone to his ears.
"hellooo? ... heeey?" sunghoon almost yelled into the phone, faint music and talking in the background.
".... hey?"
"hel- oh, hey jake! i mi- what- uhm, where are you?" sunghoon slurred, struggling to form a sentence.
".... are you high?"
"wha- why? maybe. i'm drunk."
"and high."
sunghoon laughed,
"yeah and high."

why'd u only call me when you're high?

jake should really hang up.
now.
..
but it was kinda nice hearing his voice, his laugh had him grinning from ear to ear. he had missed this, just talking to each other.
"where are you?" sunghoon asked him again.
"just at home, why?"
"at ho- alone? you, you're not with youngbin, right?" sunghoon's voice darkened.
"huh? no, i'm alone, i just woke up."
jake was confused.
"ahhh, okay, good."
jake didn't know what to say. it got awkwardly quiet for a few seconds. why would he be with youngbin?
"why would i-"
sunghoon interrupted him.
"tomorrow! i have a match. tomorrow. will you uhm.. come watch? i mean ej, heeseung and some other guys are coming. so.."
he shouldn't go.
"is nicholas playing too?" jake asked.
"yeah uh, nicho.. and jay as well."
"i'll go."
he could practically hear sunghoon's smile through the phone.
"really? you will? i- uh, i need to go now. tomorrow 4 pm. see you then."
the call ended.
jake fell back onto the bed with a smile on his lips.