"I was in the winter of my life
And the men I met along the road were my only summer
At night I fell asleep with visions of myself dancing and laughing and crying with them
I was a singer
Not a very popular one
I once had dreams of becoming a beauti...
I hang up the phone after calling Liz for the one thousandth time.
"She still not answering baby?" Says Gemma putting her hand on my shoulder.
"She must be really busy...I better get going. Thanks for taking care of Abel."
"That's what I'm here for."
While I'm riding towards the clubhouse I can't stop thinking about the prospect; is it just the strangest coincidence? Should I even tell her? Does he know she's here; is that the reason he came here in the first place? I pull into the TM parking lot and Juice rushes outside.
"I didn't find much on the guy, just a couple of felonies; he's not lying about his old man being an ex-club member, some local club, not much reach over the states."
"Where?"
"New York, Manhattan."
"Shit" I pull out a cigarette and light it.
"Isn't Lizzy's name Grant too?"
"Yeah..."
"Oh shit. I thought he kinda looked like her. Does she know?"
"Thanks Juice, talk to you later." He looks at me in confusion, then leaves.
What the fuck am I supposed to do? Wait for Liz to come back?
Lizzy's pov
I haven't talked to Jax in a couple of days. I just can't bring myself to pick up his calls. This time away from him has made it abundantly clear that I'm scared of the endless turns my life could take now. I have more than I ever had, a great boyfriend whom I love, a baby to look after, a new family and a career that seems to be taking off. The stakes have never been higher for me to not fuck up. My first performance is in a couple of hours and my nerves are getting worse and worse; this fucking performance could open or close a lot of doors for me.
I exit my hotel room and head towards the fancy ceremony room that Nero has managed to book for this week. I first check in with the sound tech guy and give him the instrumental to my songs, then, I go outside and smoke half a pack of cigarettes until I have to get up on the stage.
I feel chills all over my body as I wait for the curtains to open and for the song to start. I've really missed this feeling, it's like a whole different kind of high, a good high. I start performing in front of around 20 people and everything goes well until my second to last song, when the door open and, to my horror, Jim walks in. Suddenly I feel sick to my stomach but I don't let it show; what the fuck is he doing here? It's my fault, I jinxed it.
After my last song I get off of the stage and talk to the record label representatives, giving them Nero's number. I scan the room and spot Jim coming towards me, so I exit the hotel and light a cigarette. He stops next to me, smiling.
"You were so good." He exclaims. "I'm so proud of you."
"Yeah, what do you want?" I ask in a neutral tone, looking at the cars passing by.
"Oh come on, there's no need to be hostile; I missed you Lizzy." He puts his hand on my shoulder and I shake it off.
"Don't fucking touch me Jim."
"So that's how it is? You seem to be feistier than the last time we saw each other." He chuckles uncomfortably, then sighs. "Look, I know I hurt you bad, and I'm so sorry, I was such an asshole; I already told you that I'm single now, and it was my decision, I just couldn't..."
I feel a knot start to build up in my throat and and interrupt him. "What's the point of this Jim?"
He grabs my face and turns it towards him. "I want you back." He has tears in his eyes. "I love you Lizzy, I always have, I was just too stupid to see it...and when you had the abortion I hated you for it...but now I see that I was the one that forced your hand, I wasn't there for you, I never was." He caresses my cheek. "We could've been a family, we could've been happy and I fucked it all up."
He gently presses his soft lips against mine and I burst into tears, kissing him back. He feels so familiar and I lose myself into him, allow myself to be swallowed by my chaotic feelings. He hugs me, then pulls away. "Will you please talk to me? Just hear me out."
I sit down on the marble stairs and put my face into my hands. He puts his arm around me and pulls me into him. "I kept thinking back at how we left things, how much of an asshole I was, leaving you in that stupid little town with strangers... I put you in a really dangerous situation and turned your whole world around." He kisses my head and starts playing with my hair. "God only knows what you've been through because of me, I pushed you into that criminal's arms, made you turn back to the same life you were so desperately trying to get away from."
While he's talking I grab his tie and twist it around my fingers, I missed his fancy ties and suits, he always made me feel like some high society lady.
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"So, will you give me another chance? Let me prove to you that I've changed...we have so much history; and this time I really want to make it work.
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