Ride (Or Die) Lana Del Rey X Jax Teller

21.I scream for ice cream

Jax's pov

"She's been coming to see Abel every day Jax; how long are you gonna let this go on for?"

"I'm really not in the mood for this conversation mom." I say adjusting Abel's little blue beanie. "I have to think about it."

"Well, think faster...And don't you think I didn't see that blonde whore leave in the morning."

I look at her annoyed "That's none of your business."

She picks Abel up. "But changing diapers and waking up at night to feed the baby while you fuck pornstars is my business? You have to grow up Jax, be a dad, be a man. Men take care of their families." And with that she walks out of my room.

I lay on the bed, looking at the ceiling, not knowing what to do next. Why do things have to be so complicated? I'm no stranger to cheating, but I've never been on this end of it...god that sounds awful; I feel like shit. Maybe I should talk to her.

I sit up and put my face in my hands; I really love her, don't I? Fuck, ok. I put my kutte on and exit the clubhouse.

I get to our place and park my bike in front of the house. Her car is parked out front. No movement; I get off and knock on the door. "Liz? Let's talk... I'm sorry I reacted like that." I knock again and wait a little. "Liz?" I unlock the door and enter "Lizzy..." I ask again but this time more hesitant.

I slowly walk towards the kitchen and with the corner of my eye spot a crimson puddle on the floor; my heart starts racing like it's about to escape from my chest. I grab my gun, take a deep breath and enter the kitchen, slowly approaching the red puddle behind the counter while scanning the room. I peek over the counter only to discover a broken jar of cherry jam on the floor. Jesus Christ, the thing almost gave me a heart attack. Why would she leave it like this? I look through the house but she's nowhere to be found.

I clean up the broken jar and try to give her a call, but it goes straight to voicemail. I wait for another ten minutes, then leave; I've got work to do.

Lizzy's pov

It's been a week since I've talked to Jax, he's been avoiding me and he's surprisingly good at it. Gemma's been weird too; she's dying to know what happened, thankfully Jax hasn't told her, I've seen how she treats the people she doesn't like, and it's not nice.
I want to make things right, but I can't if I can't talk to him. I've been thinking of hanging around the garage and waiting for Jax to appear, but Tig said it's best if I don't, he'll just avoid going to the club.

I decide to go for a walk to get my mind off of things; I need to get groceries anyways. I first waste some time through the Charming Gardens. They are just so pretty and peaceful, in a strange way they remind me of Manhattan, of childhood but the good part of it, not the sister dying, parents splitting, brother leaving kind of way. I can't help but think of poor, sweet baby Abel. He's already been through so much, doesn't even know his mother. I miss having him in the house every day, kissing his soft baby face in the morning, so innocent...Me and Jax arguing isn't good for him either, even though he doesn't understand what's happening, he feels it, babies are very perceptive. Every time I've visited him he's been so agitated...

After I rethink all of my life's decisions through the gardens, I pass by the club's ice cream shop, where I spot Jax inside. I stop and stare; should I go in?

I suddenly feel extremely nauseous, like I'm about to go on stage, but worse. Chucky spots me and waves. Am I really doing this? I get that he needs space but I have to talk to him, I can't let Jim ruin all of my relationships, he's already done it enough times. I cross the street and approach the door. I freeze in front of it and take a deep breath. Oh my fucking god Liz, just stop being such a pussy and get your man back.

I swing the door open and storm through the shop to the table where Jax is talking to someone, I don't even care who sees me, I don't give a shit if they feel uncomfortable.

"Jax please, I really need to talk to you." I say stopping right in front of him and crossing my arms. "You have to at least hear me out, you can't be doing this anymore if you have the slightest wish for this to work; I know I fucked up but I love you, I can't keep staying alone in that house, please come back, give me a chance to convince you, cause I can't do it if we're apart."

I stare at him waiting for a response or some sort of reaction, but he just looks at me, mortified.

"Please..." I say defeated.

"Lizzy?" I hear a shaky voice from the dude Jax was talking to; what the fuck? I turn around and look at him, confused. I stare him up and down, trying to figure out where he knows me from; and within the next three seconds my whole life changes. I literally feel my heart drop, if I was sick before, I have no idea what I am now.

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