16.

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You know that feelin' when you think your heart
is gonna crawl right out through your shirt?
Get it a couple times a year but I've been getting it more often with her.




THIS IS A DOUBLE UPDATE! IF YOU HAVE NOT READ CHAPTER 15 PLEASE READ THAT FIRST.

TW: mention of rape and sexual assault.

HARRY'S POV:

I never knew her mom had died.. I never thought that was what happened. I'm not dumb, I just don't pick up on clues very well. She said she wished she could tell her things before, but it seemed as though she just couldn't bring herself to do it.. Not that she physically couldn't do it.. She was a bit out of it after we spoke on it, but she snapped back as soon as we got our food, and started on a new topic.

Sterling is more complex than I had thought before. She's more than just a quiet person who keeps to themself in this town, and I think it's funny that Carson and all his friends were also her friends. They all hung out with her, but I don't think any of them truly knew her. I don't even know if Jalyn and Andrea knew her as well as they said they did. I think Sterling has made it a sure thing that no one knows her except herself, and I understand it.. I'm the same way.. But I don't want to be that way with her.

She asked if we were going home after we had been asked to leave the fields. We spent hours at our table, talking, and sitting.. She enjoyed the beauty of the flowers surrounding her. I enjoyed her beauty in front of me as she watched.. They asked us to go because they needed our table and of course we understood.. We had definitely overstayed our welcome.

But when she asked I could tell she hadn't wanted to stay out with me, that she didn't truly want to go home... and I didn't want to either so we started walking around the foreign town of Woodburn. We got ice cream, and we sat there for a while too. It's dark now. And we're still walking in downtown Woodburn. The sidewalk is lit up with quaint shops, and there's people walking past us in their own world just like us.

"So... What do you think of Oregon?" She asks. "Now that you're more settled in." She keeps her hands clasped in front of her as she walks, her pretty yellow dress sweeping around her as she does.

"I think it has some amazing things to offer... I've only really been out of the house to get pancakes, and now to come here.. I've been to Chesney's, and your backyard.. Carson's house.. That's about it.. You, and Carson are really the only people I talk to." I tell her. Well you two and of course your ex best friends that you have hardly spoken about and would probably hate me if you found out that I was close with them too. Minor details.

"How is he?" She asks, and I'm shocked she's asking.

"Carson? He's good actually.. Him and Hallie are dating I think, or they're about to be if it hasn't happened yet. I haven't really talked to him this past week." I shrug my shoulders, and shove my hands in my pockets as we shuffle our feet along.

"Really? He's had the biggest crush on her since middle school I swear." She laughs and looks down. I watch her seeing her eyes continue to look down, and I see that look, the look where she's thinking.

"Do you miss him? Any of them?" I ask her, and she doesn't reply right away. Once she looks up she sighs, and I watch my feet as we walk.

"Sometimes I do... Carson and I were pretty close. Not as close as I was with Jalyn and Andrea... I don't think I've ever been that close with anyone." She laughs to herself as she seems to reminisces on the past in her mind. "I do miss them, but I know it's not worth it so I just.. I just push the feeling away." She shrugs again, and looks back down.

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