Seek

Home

"Home isn't a place to stay, it is a feeling that you belonged..."

******

KHRYZ'S PHUNSAWAT POINT OF VIEW

I caress his hair. He's sleeping soundly na parang ngayon lang s'ya nakatulog ng maayos. I wiped off my tears that keep streaming.

"S-sing, I hope when you awake y-you remember me," I whispered to him. 

I talked to Ross he said Alzheimer's disease is dangerous and sometimes the patient does not remember anything but when they wake up again there are chances that their memories will regain. I need to be patient. I asked to Sing if he want to go home but he said no. He's too scared. Scared of everything.

I looked around his room. It's messy. Everything was on the floor. I stood and clean the mess. Until I noticed something under the bed. I bend down to get it. When I saw what it is, my tears fell again. Ilang iyak pa ba? 'Yong batong sinulatan ko sa may rainbow falls nakuha niya. I turned my gaze to him. 

"Sing, did ever get tired looking for me?"

"Did you ever thought of surrendering?"

"I'm s-sorry for leaving. I'm sorry." I covered my mouth to avoid making noise I don't want him to hear that I am crying. I don't know what's pained me now. But one thing I'm sure of. Things will be going to be hard for us. But I will not give up. It's just pain. I still have to Sing. My happiness.

***

I woke up early to prepare everything. Sing still sleeping. I took a deep sigh and stood up. I went to the bathroom to take a shower but I get nervous when I heard a loud noise.  So immediately rushed down. I went out to the bathroom and I was surprised Sing is awake and he falls to the bed. Mabilis akong lumapit sa kan'ya.

"Sing are you okay?" I asked. He looked at me and he looks so surprised.

"K-khryz?" His tears are now streaming down from his eyes. I feel relief he remembers me now. Dahan-dahan akong lumapit sa pwesto niya. "I-is this a dream?" I wiped his tears. I did not let go of my tears. I don't want him to see me crying. He hugged me tightly. I hugged him back.

"I-it's real right?" He asked in the middle of our hug. I nodded. "I-i thought hindi na k-kita makikita." He buried his face in my neck. Ramdam na ramdam ko ang luha niya. He's crying too hard. I tapped his back.

"I'm s-sorry. I'm sorry for being a coward. B-but I love you, Khryz. I love you so much." My heart raced so fast as he said that.

"I love you too, Sing. I love you too damn much." He pulled himself to our hug.

"How you k-know—"

"Your mom tells me everything." My tears betrayed me they flowed like a river. As soon as Sing saw my tears pain crossed his eyes. I smiled at him. "N-no need to scare. I'm here—" agad n'yang pinutol ang sasabihin ko.

"B-but you know what will go—" I didn't let him finish his words I claim his lips to make him quiet.

"I don't want to hear it. Let's just be happy." I uttered as I moved away my lips from him. I helped him to stand and sit on the bed.

"M-my legs are too weak." I massage his legs. While doing that he keeps staring at me. "K-khryz..."

"Hmm.." I hummed.

"Let's go home." I turn my gaze to him and smile.

"We will." He hugged me again.

"B-but you know what Khryz? This moment. While hugging you I feel already home. You are my home." You are my home too. So please Sing don't ever leave me. Because I will be lost without you.

SING POINT OF VIEW

"I love you," I whispered to him. Khryz looked at me with a frown.

"I know. I love you too. Please stop being so cheesy sing. Look at people they are staring at us." I look around and he's right everyone's looking at us. We are already on the plane.

I gaze at the window the sky was so beautiful. I'm so happy right now. My tiredness. My efforts are paid off. I'm holding his hand tightly and he's holding mine too. And it's fit to each other. I don't know how many tears I shed since Khryz left. I did everything to find him but fate doesn't want me to find him. I continue chasing him. I continue looking and seeking him. But the funny thing was. He's the one who found me. I'm happy that he's with me. But I'm scared too of what will happen next. Wala namang sigurong masama kung susulitin ko nalang. Wala naman siguro masama kung magiging makasarili ako para maging masaya. Khryz is my happiness ever since. Losing him is my biggest fear. But seeing him in pain is my death. F*ck this life.

"Hey, are you okay?" I came back to my senses when Khryz poke me.

"Y-yes. I'm just bored." He chuckled. He handed me his phone.

"Use that for your boredom." I get his phone. I open it. It has a password. I knew that I know his password but I don't remember.

"Why?" Khryz asked when he noticed that I'm staring at his phone. I smiled at him.

"Nothing. Here. I will just use mine—"

"Just tell me if you don't remember my password sing. It won't hurt me. Okay. Just tell me everything. And about your phone. You lost it remember." I bite my lower lip. I saw the pain in his eyes but he's doing his very best to hide it. I always hurt him.

"I'm sorry." He hold my hand and intertwined it with his.

"No need to be sorry. Sing I am here. Don't be scared because no matter what happens even it'd pain me. I don't care. Always remember that."

"K-khryz... Can we travel together?" I asked him.

"Where?" I smiled at him and place my head on his shoulder.

"To Hawaii, Italy, Maldives, Finland, and Switzerland."

"Nakapunta na tayo sa mga lugar—"

"Together. That's all our dream countries. You went there to run away. I went there to chase you and now, I want us to go there together. Not to run away, not to chase but to create memories with you."

He nodded. "Let's do that but I want you to go to the doctor first." I'm scared of what the doctor going to say to me. "Sing I told you. Don't be afraid—" Mukhang nahalata n'yang nag-aalinlangan ako. To reassure him I smiled. 

"Yes, let's go to the doctor." As long as Khryz with me I will not be going to be scared. He will be my strength.

"I love you, Khryz. My memories might fade but my love for you will remain forever. If I forgot you. My heart will lead the way to remember you"