All I Have

Chapter 11 ~ Gone From Our Sight, and That is All.

'No.'

'You cannot simply say no.' My grandmother argues, and already I can tell she's getting annoyed by my reluctance.

'Yes I can, I just did.' I shrug, taking a large bite of my toast. She's already fussy this morning because I'm eating downstairs with the maids and butlers, and not at our designated dining room.

'Marzia, you need to have a dress fitting, what if I haven't sized you up properly and the dress doesn't fit for your father's coronation!' She says, as if it really would be the worst thing in the world.

'Grandma, isn't it comforting the amount of faith I put in you?' I ask, still trying to worm my way out of having to go for a fitting, one of the things I've happily avoided the last six years.

'Asher, make sure she gets in the car on time for that fitting, tomorrow at noon. I will not have Alissa's time wasted.' My grandmother huffs pointing at my bodyguard who stands in the corner and refuses to come sit down.

'Yes ma'am.' He says, as if he's ever been able to get me to do anything.

'And please change before your mother gets here, you know how she likes things.' My grandmother says, pointing at my dressing down and sweatpants, matched with hair that doesn't constitute a ponytail with how messy it is, 'I'm sending Sara up to you in an hour before your mother arrives.'

'Please no.' I beg, but she's already walking away, heels clicking in the wooden floorboards.

Once she's gone, Asher finally relents and comes to sit himself down next to me on the maids bar stools around the island. I would tell you I'm sitting here for moral reasons, however this reminds me of home, in London, and I happen to really like the staff.

Asher agrees with my grandmother, telling me we're not setting a proper example sitting in here. I countered him with the fact that I don't think once in my life have I ever been proper, and I don't know why he thinks I'd start now.

'You might actually have to start listening to her, you know. She is the queen.' Asher says, taking a piece of toast from the mass amounts of food the chef decided to prepare us this morning.

See, Chef Gaston and I were best friends before I moved away. I spent most of my time down here in the kitchen, getting under his feet. The Aga in the corner was always warm, and so in the winters I would bring my book and curl myself up beside it.

Last night at four-am, when the sofa in the library became unbearable to keep trying to sleep on I wandered downstairs and tried to read with the light from the lantern outside, but the window isn't that close to the stove, and anywhere else is too cold on the tiles. I tried for about a hour, but gave up and after deciding that sleep just wasn't going to happen, I spent the rest of the time until dawn sitting on the balcony in a blanket, and not for the first time, wishing Emilio was here to understand.

'Yeah, but you're not so I don't have to listen to you.' I sneer jokily and he nods, knowing just how true that is.

'Are you excited to see your mother?' Asher asks, as if he was simply asking how I slept.

'No.' I tell him honestly, 'My mother I've spoken to every few days since I left, it's the kids I can't wait to see. With Tegean and Ansel, it'll be the first time I've ever met them in person.'

'Don't you talk to the girls on Skype? Ansel will know who you are, he'll recognise your voice.' Asher says, comfortingly.

'Yeah they'll recognise me.' I nod, happily, 'I'll just actually be a person today. An actual human being, you know?'

Asher nods, making his way through enough breakfast to last him until afternoon tea in the capital centre East Laumant, with everyone after mum's arrived. My dad's already out of the castle for the day, and my grandmother had a royal appearance in the city, so Asher and I have been left to our own devices for the day.