The Show ((Luke Brooks Fanfic))

Chapter 33

THANK YOU EVERYONE FOR BEING SO SUPPORTIVE. I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH OMG, I ADORE YOU ALL AND I CAN'T BEGIN TO TELL YOU HOW MUCH YOU HAVE ALL HELPED ME. 

SO LAST CHAPTER TONIGHT, AND THAT'S IT.

If you want more fics like mine, read my other called 'Almost Right'. I'm also attempting to write a proper book and hopefully if it's got what it takes, I would love to get it published so this won't be the last of me! Love you all, 

Bec 

*Luke's POV* 

My hands shake and my legs wobble as I force myself to get a drink from the kitchen or i'll pass out or something. My fingers unscrew the lid of a plastic bottle of water and I bring it to my lips. The cold liquid burns my throat as it slides down and I can't help but gag, spewing all the water on the floor. I stare at the puddle on the floor in need of something to calm me down because I know what's going to happen next. I breathe slowly and begin to put the cap back on the bottle but I stop. 

Before I know it, the bottle is thrown to the other side of the room and the water is covering everything. My fists punch into the walls and with one punch, it goes right through. I let out a scream and fall to the ground. 

I cover my face with my hands because I shouldn't be crying. It's stupid and Jai does it, not me. I don't cry. Not over a girl.

But it feels like a different sort of cry. It feels like I want to, even though i shouldn't, and i want to cry outloud. I want to crawl up on my bed and stay there because I feel so worthless. I want to stay alone forever. 

My mind puts images of myself when I first felt this way, when I wanted to die all together. When Bennie saved me minutes before I would have left for good. She was the one who helped me and stood by me. She took care of me and ignored all the other shit and made me her prioty. I knew that she had her own issues, I witnessed one of her panic attacks and her depressed phase but I still took the attention. And she is probably still dealing with it and I was her escape.

The lump in my throat is unbearable, I try to swallow but it won't go. 

Fuck.

I know what I have to do.

I rub my eyes harshly and let out another cry.

Me and Bennie are similiar. 

I grab my keys and run out the door and into the cold. The wind blows my body but it doesn't slow me down, it just makes me work faster. I tuck my keys into my pocket and charge as fast as I can in the direction of her place. 

It's always me who ruins this and it's always her who picks up the pieces and now I want to pick them up and I want to be the one to super glue them back together. 

In my head I see her eyes when she sees me. I see the tiny gleam of relief behind the tears and a sparkle. Then I see her lips, I see them drop ajar in that perfect way she does. Her lips are like the ones in the adverts, that are naturally open and puffy. Then she smiles and her lips press together and she gives a pained smile which eventually turns into a full smile after she's let out a sigh of defeat. 

I imagine her arm wrapped around my neck and her lips on mine which her eyes tightly closed. And everytime she pulls away I feel sort of empty, as if the jar inside of me has been opened. It's feels like when you leave a job unfinished and it sort of tugs at you, telling you to continue or it will just self destruct. It used to be hard to imagine why kissing meant so much to people but now I understand that it's more than two lips pressing together, it's way more. It's where the passion and bliss comes from. 

What feels like hours later, i'm on Bennie's road. I jog towards her house and I feel a flutter.

I love her. I love her more than I thought.

I begin to laugh like a fucking idiot but I don't care because it's so fucking true. And I'm going to tell her... 

My eyes stare at the sky and I take in a huge breath, still laughing. I know I'm crazy and I may look like I belong in a ward but I'm geninuely happy, until I see Skips' car. And then him with Bennie.

He see's me first and marches towards me with his fists clench. Before I have chance to stop him, I'm on the floor and getting kicked and punched. My cheeks are burning and I can see blood on the tip of my nose. I hold my hands in front of me in attempt to push him off but he's got me at an advantage. I shout stop but he doesn't, he just continues harder. I see Bennie behind him, trying to stop him. She shoves his side which angers him even more. He glimpses at her, giving me enough time to climb to my feet. Ignoring the pain, i punch him. I kick him. I go full out on his sorry ass. 

"She doesn't..." I shout, "... fucking love you!"

Daniel whimpers on the floor and Bennie looks even more aware than before. She steps in front of me and Daniels body and before I can stop, I catch her shoulder. She lets out a cry and I automatically bring my hands to my head.

"I didn't mean to, I couldn't stop. Bennie. Please, i'm sorry." 

She turns her back and starts walking to the end of her drive. I can hear her whimpers and I can't help but hate myself even more. I rush towards her and I stand in front of her. Her head is down and her body is shaking. I slowly put my hand on her chin but she backs away.

"Don't touch me! You... Y-you can't touch m-me anymore." She cries and everything in my body callapses. 

"Please. Please..." I cry back. "I love you, Bennie. I love you and you love me."

She lets out a scream and begins to shove me backwards. I don't bother fighting her back because there's no point. There's no point holding her back, I don't have the energy to anyway. I feel numb all over.

"I... don't... love you!" She says after every push. "I hate..."

And all of a sudden, there are two lights approaching me. I shout but she shoves me once more.

Then it goes black.