The Show ((Luke Brooks Fanfic))

Chapter 8

*Bennie's POV*

I open my eyes to see the wall. The dull boring wall. The one which used to be covered in photographs; memories.

I decide not to look any longer because the empty wall makes me angry, it makes me regret something that I shouldn't regret. I turn onto my other side and my eyes feel like they are getting ripped out. The light shines brightly through my window, I must have forgotten to draw the curtains. I cover my eyes with the duvet and form a ball on the bed. I haven't got the energy for life today, I just want one day off.

I grunt and roll off the bed still in the same position. My body hits the floor and I move my body like a football. I do several rolls in my duvet until I reach the window, where I shut my curtains. Freedom!

I shove the duvet off my body and pull on my school clothes. It's finally Friday. I could sit down and reflect about my week but I think it's better of not to. I think I should just go eat, and plan out my weekend.

Sitting, eating, sleeping and obviously watching repeats of 'I Used to be Fat'

Honestly I hate that show but it's kind of nice to know that people like to actually do things about their problems. Some of them persevere and others give up and then realise what they really need to do. I wish I could have determination. In some ways, I do. I'm determined in school, my grades and exams. That's one of the things that's most important to me, learning. I like learning actually, it helps take my mind of my problems and onto the actual problems of the world.

I reach out for my brush and shove my hair into a messy ponytail and it doesn't look good. I raise one eyebrow at my reflection. When did I stop caring about what I looked like?

My uniform isn't the most comfy uniform but it's the rules. The large blazer feels heavy on the blouse underneath. I wear a simple pair of school trousers on the bottom half of me, uniform has never been flattering. I pull on a pair of socks, following by my shoes. A familiar grass stain is tattooed across the majority of my right shoe and as for the left, mud has made a protection coating for it.

I rush to my kitchen and try my best to use the shoe polish over the top of the stains, since using water and the sink would probably equal to a huge mess and me being late for school.

When I think it looks acceptable I stand up straight and head over to my books. I set everything up and get ready to leave.

"I'm leaving. Don't forget to go to your group today..." I call to my mother who is upstairs, presumably in bed still.

When I don't get any response, I walk up to her room. I trust her but times like this, she scares the hell out of me.

I push the door open and the first thing I see when I enter her room is the bed which appears to be empty. My eyes widen and I move more into the centre of her room. My eyes dart around the nicely set out products on her desks to the wardrobe door which is left ajar. I look back over to the bed, I see the light creases in the sheets, confirming that she slept there. I feel a hint of relief, but not enough. I walk over to the bed and place my hand on it, judging by the temperature of the bed, she's just recently got off it. Another sigh of relief.

I walk out the room and head to my room and that's when I see her lying in my bed. She looks so comfortable and peaceful.

"Hello, lovely." She murmurs, just before I exit the room.

"How you feeling?" I question, trying to copy her volume.

"I'm just a bit tired; long week, you know?" She sits up and look directly at me.

"Then you should stop going to work, it's not good for you. Just wait..."

"Wait? Until what? Until I'm better?" She asks, but not angrily. Her voice is still so calm.

"I'm just suggesting... Never mind, I got to go to school. I'll see you tonight for tea. Make sure you don't miss your group." I smile.

"Why you in such a rush?" She hums, looking at the clocks. I follow her eyes to see that I'm early. Earlier than normal. One hour early.

She begins to laugh and I feel my face redden. How did I forget to look at the clock? I just try and shake off my stupidity and decide to laugh it off along with my mom.

"Budge up then." I say pulling my weight onto the bed next to my mother.

The bed is warm and I remove my blazer.

"It won't always be like this." She whispers.

"Like what?" I respond although I already know what she means.

"Like you taking care of me when it's supposed to be the other way around. Like you taking on everything on your own. And like you feeling empty." She says and the last word hits me.

"I don't feel empty..." I slightly choke. I don't want her feeling like she needs to blame herself for my issues. In fact, I don't have issues. I'm fine, I like my life.

"I know you're hurting, Bennie."

*Luke's POV*

I see Bennie and her mother under the sheets and I hear the awkward conversation between them. My earphones play out their speech so clearly. They speak so uncomfortable but they look the opposite.

"Listen, I'm fine, you're fine. You know what, we are all so very very fine!" She speaks and I can't tell if she's saying that through gritted teeth sarcastically or she's just that enthusiastic. I decide on the second one as it seems more likely.

"Bennie, you know you can talk to me. I don't want you getting hurt or you having the same problems as me." She murmurs and I concentrate on them more. So there defiantly is something wrong with her. I knew she wasn't a stick insect by choice.

"I won't, and you don't have problems. You have just hit a bump in the road." She croaks.

"How long is this road, Bennie?" She whispers quietly that I almost can't hear.

Bennie gets up and picks up her uniform blazer and walks out of the screen of the camera and I can no longer see her.

Beau's voice brings me back to reality.

"Yo, you coming? We're going to drop by our little friend Bennie's house." He slyly grins and I feel something inside me set on fire. I feel something that I want. Something to boost me, something that makes me want adrenaline.

Everything I've seen so far on this video makes Bennie almost innocent but that's not right. So she deals with shit, it doesn't mean she's not a little slutty hoe. Daniel said she hurt him and all that heartbreaking shit. She's got so many secrets and I kind of want to expose them, not just for Daniel but for her sake. She needs a taste of her own medicine.

"Sounds... Fun." I bite my lower lip.