Versed

XI

My heart feels for Eric I want nothing more than to be there for him but I had to do this. I could tell he didn't want me to leave and truthfully I didn't want to. But I haven't heard from my mom since and I can't focus on Eric when my mind constantly drifts to Fraya. Walking to the screen door I feel my heart thumping just a tad bit louder than normal. Opening the door all I can hear is silence, the house is idly silent and the air doesn't feel the same. It's like everything that's happened has clung to the air and has made what once was a beautiful family home into this dark depressing place.

Going into the kitchen I can hear her cries coming from down the stairs. I know they're hers because my dad doesn't cry. Going down the stairs, this hallway feels smaller seeing her in bed she's hunched over her face in her hands. She looks up as I enter the room and quickly recovers wiping at her face.

"Hey ma."

She tries to smile but it falters, she can't maintain it and she knows I know. "Jordan told you?"

"Real question is why didn't you?"

"You deserved to be happy."

I chuckle unhumorously, "Where's daddy?"

She shrugs, "He is so angry at the world." Her voice cracks and I rise from my place on her bed to go make some tea. Before I can attempt make it around the corner she calls for me. "She needs you..." I shake my head not saying anything. "There's a family gathering at the rehab and she..."

Wants me there. "Mama can we just go have some tea and I'll make you a sandwich." 

She shakes her head and I look at her; my eyes pleading. I'm telling her everything I want without even moving my lips and because she's my mother I know she understands. I walk upstairs and start the electric kettle. The house feels different like a fog has taken over this once happy place. My dad's form comes looming over me and when I look at his face his features look older and tired. He touches my shoulder; it's long and drawn out, like he wants to say something. Truthfully, my dad never really had to say much because either my mother beat him to it or he told my mother to say it so he didn't have to.

"Daddy...I don't understand."

"Did your mother tell you?" He asks under his concerned brow.

"Yeah she did?"

"Go, your mother needs you there. She found her body so she needs you there."

"I'll be there."

Making my mother her tea and sitting with them to get further explanation on the matters concerning my sister and anything else going on in their lives. Apparently my parents have been going for broke paying for my sister's rehabilitation. Which is making my dad work more and my mother alone more than she should be. I'm trying not be angry with my sister I'm trying not to think about how this is effecting us negatively. Getting back to my car I try to breathe but my chest is becoming hardened or tightened. The confinement of this seatbelt is sending me into a state of consternation.

My phone rings distracting me from the spiraling of my thoughts and my heart. Looking at the name on the phone I answer only to hear him crying into the phone. I've never heard the sounds of his cries and my heart feels this shattering feeling. My own eyes react to the sound and the tears fall rolling down my cheeks in response.

He silences his cries, "She's gone." 

****

I slip into my lace black dress that hovers just around my knees and just as I put on my dress Eric steps into the room. He looks exhausted his eyes are red and hollow like he hasn't slept in three days since he saw her body lying there. I walk over to him and touch the rough stubble on his cheek and he melts into my hand. Hesitant to retreat, I know we have to go soon since the funeral is in a few hours. Grabbing his suit from the closet I rest it on the bed and return in front of him. I run my hands along is chest before going to his button. I yank his shirt from inside of his pants and begin unbuttoning revealing his torso.

He sighs, "Maia."

"Let me do this for you."

He shakes his head and I find myself, undoing his pants. Getting down on my knees I unzip and the pants pool at his ankles. Lifting his leg I remove the pants from around his ankles. Then I start for his socks my heart is beating so profoundly,I want him I know that but how can I do this now? How can I want him even after seeing him so disheveled and solemn. He's hurting and I want to make him happy. No, I want to bring him pleasure. I want us both to have pleasure.

Already on my knees I remove the briefs and just as I suspected he is still turned on sadness or not. I take his length in between my lips and suck. Sucking with suction as I go down his shaft. Coming up for air I allow my lips to pop at the tip and again as my saliva salivates his member. My repetitive movement and my hands playing with his testicles I move as though he is inside of me. I can feel my own arousal as I pump him, earning the reward of his deep throated moans. Throating him faster I take up the speed to finish myself and he ejaculates in my mouth.

He takes my chin in his fingers, he wants to say something but instead he walks away heading for the bathroom turning on the shower. Sitting in the floor feeling unbelievably aroused and unwanted all in the same moment. I haven't even had a chance to tell him about what's going on with my sister. Picking myself up off the floor, I fix myself up and freshen up at the sink.

The air is tense and I feel disconnected, the silence is eery. I refrain from my emotions and head downstairs waiting for him. Entering the kitchen I pour myself a glass of pinot taking a sip as I look outside. Eric creeps up behind me making me turn to his attention. He's dressed in an all white suit down to his shoes. 

I gasp and all he says is, "Ready?"

I nod finishing my glass of wine and proceed to take his arm as we walk out to the car, the silence couldn't be broken. The air is crisp and the wind feels like an additional beating. Getting to the cemetery, everyone is dressed in black all but one. There she is, Aurora has on an oversized hat and a white suit and no bra.

I hear myself grumble from deep within my throat. Of course I didn't get the memo to wear white and now this funeral has turned into their wedding. Piping down my jealousy, I take hold of his arm and walk up to the seats. He mutters something under his breath that I didn't quite hear, looking around the plot I see my mother and father. I wish I could go to them but my jealousy won't let me leave him. I know the minute I do she will snake her way to his side.

Aurora comes to him, her lips pouty and her words silky, "Darling...you look exquisite."

For what feels like the first time in hours, he speaks, "What happened? You were supposed to set everything up in white. That's what she wanted."

"Do not raise your voice at me." She scowls her voice deeper and lower than usual. "Do you know how hard I've been working on giving this woman everything she wanted. She left three options for me to choose from and since you weren't answering my calls I had to decide on my own. So this is what you have, you should be grateful and mind your manners."

"Thank you." He spits, storming off to a seat.

I've been wanting a words all day and the most he has to say is to her. I hate that they have a history. I hate that they both making me feel this way. I hate being jealous, not bothering to go sit with him I go to my parents hugging them and thanking them for coming for me. Aurora took a seat by Eric and naturally I went to the opposite side of him touching his leg. Just completely peeing all over him.