What Is This Family?!

S1 Ep1

*Confessional - Gale*

When I said yes to letting Dad adopt more kids other than Dick, I made a big mistake. And I mean BIG! My life was fine with just my little sister and brother Brianne and Rudy! But no! Dad sees a helpless little orphan and decides to adopt him! Then more come! First, a street rat who tried to steal the tires off Dad's car, then the son of the owner of Drake Industries, my half brother from a one night stand with some chick from Arabia, a mute girl who is the daughter of a lady that worked with that chick that gave birth to my half brother, some many red haired ladies... Must I go on? My main point is WHAT FAMILY IS THIS?!

*Cut to intro video* *Various pictures of the family, some with the original five Waynes, others with several mishaps of the large family*

*Camera pans to the kitchen, where several kids are eating breakfast*

"Dude! Check this out! Jojo Siwa sweared on livestream!" A raven haired boy cried out to his siblings.

"Saying shit isn't that bad, Dick. Just not the ideal word to say if you are a weird children's song singer." An older girl with Platinum blonde hair replied. Dick stuck his tongue out at her.

"I still don't get why you like her so much, Dick. Her voice is squeaky and scratchy and it sounds like she's screaming bloody murder. The way she sings bloody murder is by singing those kids' songs that don't make any sense whatsoever."  Another raven haired boy said. He had a streak of white running through his front locks.

"Yes! She's like 'My HiGh ToP sHoES! I'mMa COmE bAcK lIkE a BoOmErAnG! D.r.E.a.M!'" Yet another child sang mockingly. This girl had red hair and glasses.

"You're being mean! Dad! Everyone's being mean to me!" Dick called out for his adopted father. Said man strolled into the kitchen, holding his wife's hand.

"Um, good morning to you too? What's going on? And Dick, what have I told you about cellphones at the table?" Bruce said.

"To not have them at the the table. But Dad! They're being mean!"

"Really? How so?" His adopted mother, Diana Prince asked her 15 year old son.

"Gale said saying shit isn't bad. Then Jason said that Jojo Siwa isn't a good singer. Then Babs mocked the best song lyrics!" The teen boy said.

"Ugh. All I said was that her voice is squeaky, scratchy and it's like she's singing bloody murder by singing children's songs." The boy with the white streak repeated.

"And it's true. Her songs make no sense. At. All. Who in their right mind would sing about their high top shoes? I mean come on!" The red haired girl exclaimed.

"Dick, I'm sorry to say this but, your siblings are right. Jojo Siwa isn't the best singer. Even Arianna Grande is better than her. But not that much better. And please, refrain from saying the 's' word." Diana replied. Dick huffed and stuffed his mouth with Honey Bunches of Oats cereal.

"Okay, gang! Roll call!" Yet ANOTHER kid with red hair strutted in. She was dressed in a Halloween military costume.

"AaaaaaaaTtention! Abigale!"

"Here, sadly."

"Barbara!"

"Eyo!"

"Dick!"

"Hello!"

"Jason!"

"Sup."

"Rudolph!"

"Here." At this some of the kids snickered. A small "As if that name is worse than mine." was heard coming from Dick.

"Timothy!"