Nine Months Later
Rehab was different this time. I had a sponsor who understood what I was going through, a therapist who actually listened, and a full support team behind me. I was able to make it out of Rehab in nine months instead of the predicted year the psychiatrist. I met someone while I was in rehab. His name was Cody Morgan. He was in Rehab for an eating disorder. I didn’t know guys had a problem with their weight like girls did. He was kind to me, a great friend and later a lover. We both had that person we loved, but they thought we deserved better. Cody’s girlfriend thought he didn’t need extra baggage while he went to get better. She said that if they wanted to, when he came home, they could pick up where they left off. He went home the month before me, and from what I’ve heard, she’s accepted him with open arms. She didn’t care that he had an affair with me while he was away. She knew he was helping me cope with losing Bram.
Fran and Bram were the only two who didn’t visit me. While I didn’t mind the absence of my mother, I desperately needed to see Abraham. Every week I would call him on Tuesday, the day before visitor’s day, begging him to come. He never picked up. I would cry over my lost love, leaving my shattered heart out for all to see. Cody helped me pick up the pieces.
“Hey, Ophelia, are you listening?” Viola asked. Viola picked me up from the Center with baby David and Cody and his girlfriend. I had a hunch that Viola and Dad had a party for me at home. I didn’t mind that at all.
“What?” I asked, looking at my sister.
“The divorce is being finalized tomorrow.” She said. Stephen filed divorce papers with mother a month after I was in Rehab. Stephen asked Dad and Valentine to move back into the house, and they obliged.
“Good.” I whispered. “So, what are we doing when we get home?”
“It’s a secret.” Cody replied. I rolled my eyes at his comment. Viola pulled into the driveway and we hopped out. They forced me to be in front as I opened the screen door and stepped inside.
“Nathan, Val? Is anyone home?” I called as I walked into the living room.
“Surprise,” The chorus of my friends and family called. Dad, Val, Nathan, Nikko and his girlfriend, Stephen, Noah, Georgie, Carol and the gang were all here. One by one, they came up and bear-hugged me.
“I love you guys.” I said after hugging my dad. “You made coming home amazing.”
“Hey, we’re not done yet!” Viola exclaimed, setting David in his play pen. “We’ll have some lunch, then cake, and spend the rest of the day together.”
“Everyone, to the dining room,” Val ordered, leading the way with Carol. I went to join them as Dad grabbed my hand.
“Yeah, Dad,” I asked. He smiled and pulled me towards the kitchen area. “I have something for you in the kitchen.”
“Dad, you didn’t have to get me anything.” I said as he pushed me into the kitchen.
“He didn’t.” He said, standing in the center of the room with his hands in his pockets. “Hey, Fee.” He said softly. I clenched my teeth together. No one called me ‘Fee’ anymore. I asked them not to. I asked them to either ‘Elli’ or ‘Ophelia’.
“I’m actually surprised Val and Nathan let me through the front door. Nikko and your Dad and Viola have been gracious to let me in the loop. I asked Val to, but he stopped talking to me.” Bram said, looking at the ground. “I-I missed you, Fee.”
“Get the hell out.” I grit out. He couldn’t come in here and come back into my life. “You can’t just come back into my life after you walked out on me. I hate you! I want you gone. Val had good enough sense to stop talking to you.” I seethed, walking up to him and punching him in the chest. “Get out of my house!” I yelled. Bram wheezed something as I stormed up the back stairs that lead to the second floor of the house. I went into my room and slammed the door shut. I’ll admit, I was furious, but I didn’t mean a word I said to Bram. I still love him. It’s hard not to love him; I spent nine months pining away for him. I can’t believe I just did that.
“Hey, Fee, can I come in?” Viola asked as she knocked on my door. She entered as I said yes, with David in her arms. “He heard his Aunty and wanted to comfort her.”
“Thanks, Vi.” I whispered. She sat on my bed and let David lay on the bed. “Is he still here?”
“Bram is right where you left him. He’s hoping you’ll come back down so he can explain.” Viola said, brushing her fingers through my hair. “He had his reasons.”
“He didn’t return any of my calls. He didn’t try to visit. He made no attempts to contact me.” I said. I could feel the tears springing to my eyes. “They better be some damned good reasons.”
“They are, my sweet Fee.” She said, kissing my forehead. “Just let him explain.”
“Fine, but he has to come up here.” I said. Viola grinned as she lifted David into her arms and left the room to get Bram. Bram came up a few moments later and knocked on my door.
“Can I come in? Or will I get his with something?” He asked, trying to make a joke. Bram changed since I last saw him. His hair was a little longer, almost touching his shoulders, and he had a bit of scruff on his face. He gave me a halfhearted smile, but it never reached his eyes. His eyes seemed dead, which scared me. Something happened to my Bram.
“You can come in.” I said softly, sitting cross-legged on my bed. “How have you been?”
“I’ve been managing.” He said, moving into the room. He closed the door and leaned against it. “You look good, Fee.” We sat in an awkward silence for a few minutes, staring at anything but each other.
“I want to know why you broke up with me and what happened with her.” I said, looking at Bram. He sighed and ran his hands through his hair. I’ve waited nine months for this explanation. I think I deserve it.
“Mom must have told Shayna that I was dating you, so she would stay away for good this time. Shayna broke into my home and waited for me in my bedroom so she could ambush me when I came home. I was telling her to get out when she came on to me. I was pushing her off of me as you came in. I never meant to hurt you.”
“But you did.” I said. “You broke my heart.”
“I know and it was the worst mistake I’ve ever made.” He admitted. “I thought by breaking up with you, you’d have a better chance of getting better. But when Viola and Nikko said you were struggling to even smile, I knew I did something wrong. When your Dad said that you cried when he came, because you were expecting me to join him, I knew I was an ass. I needed to see you, Fee, to beg for your forgiveness.”
“Why didn’t you?” I asked, hugging my knees to my chest. “Why didn’t you return my calls?”
“Nathan and Val said you found a guy. I thought it would be best to let you move on.” Bram said, putting his hand on the door knob. Cody, he meant Cody. “Do you forgive me? That’s all I came to get, and then I’ll leave you alone.”
“I forgive you, Abraham.” I said. He gave me a smile that still didn’t reach his eyes as he turned the knob. “But I’m not seeing anyone. Cody has a girlfriend. He was my emotional support and I was his. He was just another Nikko.” Bram stopped in his tracks, his back to me. I just wanted him to turn around so I could make his eyes twinkle again. I hopped off my bed and walked over to him, tentatively putting my hand on his shoulder.
“Your eyes don’t sparkle anymore, and I’m afraid that it’s partially my fault.” I said, curling my fingers into his shirt. “I know that your smile doesn’t reach your eyes, and I know you’re hurting inside. I want you to know that I love you, Bram. So very much,” I moved in front of him and closed the door. I removed his hand from the door and leaned against it. His eyes were closed as I touched his cheek, and they remained closed.
“I’m not saying I want to just pick up where we left off, because we were in a bad place then. I want a new start with you. Forget what happened in the past. This is day one for us, but only if you want this too.” I said. I pulled his face close to mine and kissed his forehead, his cheeks, his nose, but not his lips. I wouldn’t humiliate myself in case he said no. “Please say something.” Bram gathered me in his arms and held me against him. He buried his nose in my hair and stayed quiet for some time.
“God, I love you so much.” He whispered in my ear. “I’m never letting you go, again. I was so stupid before—”
“Shh, Bram,” I said, taking his face in my hands. “That was the past. This is day one of the rest of our lives.” I leaned in and kissed him, sealing our future together.
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