How Are You Alive (Dean Winchester Love Story Book 4)

Chapter 30

Chapter 30

Seems like everyday you cross my mind
Even after such a long long time
I still think about the way you smile
It tears me apart to know that it won't ever be the same again
No it won't ever be the same again

Sorry by Art of Dying

DEAN'S POV

"Pamela get home okay?" Hear Anna say from behind me. I turn my head to my left to look behind me as I lean against the Imapla. "Yeah. She said she was sorry. It's just after last time, she, uh...this is just a little too rich for her blood." I say.

"I don't blame her. You guys should do the same." Anna says biting her bottom lip. "Well, we're not that smart. Can I ask you something? What do They want me for? Why did they save me?" I ask. "I'm sorry. The angels aren't talking about it. And it was after I fell." She sighs. "That's another question. Why would you fall? Why would you want to be one of us?" I ask, confused.

"You don't mean that." She giggles. "I don't? A bunch of...of miserable bastards...Eating, crapping, confused, afraid." I chuckle. "I don't know. They're loyalty...forgiveness...love." She says, like she is in a complete day dream.

"Pain." I add. "Chocolate cake." She smiles. "Guilt." I also point out. "Sex." She blushes. "Yeah, you got me there." I chuckle. "I mean it. Every emotion, Dean, even the bad ones...It's why I fell. It's why...why I'd give anything not to go back. Anything." She sighs as she leans against the Impala, really close to me and we both look each other in the eyes.

"Feelings are overrated, if you ask me." I scoff, thinking about the long agonizing fight going on between Skye and I, about me keeping from her what I experienced in hell. "Beats being an angel." She scoffs back.

"How's that possible? You guys are powerful and perfect. You don't doubt yourselves or God or anything." I say, looking at her. "Perfect...Like a marble statue. Cold...no choice....only obedience. Dean, do you know how many angels have actually seen God? Seen his face?" She asks.

"All of you?" I ask. "Four angels. Four. And I'm not one of them." She says. "That's it? Well, then, how do you even know that there is a God?" I chuckle. "We have to take it on faith...Which we're killed if we don't." She looks down at the ground.

"Huh." I sigh. "I was stationed on earth 2,000 years. Just....watching...silent...invisible...out on the road...sick for home...waiting on orders from an unknownable father I can't begin to understand. So don't tell me that." She sighs.

I let out a laugh. "What is so funny? What?" She laughs, looking back up at me. "Nothing. Sorry. It's just...I can relate." I smile at her. "Hey." I hear Skye says and I quickly turn my head to the sound of her voice which is right up ahead of me. She has her eyes crossed, looking at Anna and I with jealousy. "Did you find anything?" Anna asks. "I think so." She says.

BOBBY'S LIBRARY - NIGHT

"Union, Kentucky. Found some accounts of a local miracle." Sam says. "Yeah?" I ask. "Yeah. In '85, there was an empty field outside of town. Six months, later, there was a full-grown oak. They say it looks a century old at least." Skye says.

"Anna, what do you think?" Sam asks. "The grace. Where it hit, it could have done something like that, easy." She smiles. "So grace ground zero...it's not destruction. It's..." I pause looking for a good word to use.

"Pure creation." Anna says.

OAK FIELD - DAY~

"It's beautiful." Skye says. "It's where the grace touched down. I can feel it." Anna says. "You ready to do this?" I ask Anna. "Not really." Anna says nervously. "Anna, what are we even looking for?" Skye asks as Anna puts her hand on the tree. "It doesn't matter. It's not here. Not anymore. Someone took it." Anna's voice cracks.

BARN - NIGHT

"We still got the hex bags. I say we need back to the panic room." I suggest. "What, forever?" Skye scoffs. "I'm just thinking out loud! How about you stop acting all stuck up." I tell her off and she looks at me with hurt in her eyes and a bit taken back.

"Oh, you call that thinking?" Ruby snarks. "Hey! Hey, hey, hey. Stop it." Sam interferes. "Anna's grace is gone. You understand? She can't angel up. She can't protect us. We can't fight Heaven and Hell. One side maybe, but not both. Not at once." Ruby says.

"Um...guys? The angels are talking again." Anna says. "What are they saying?" I ask. "It's weird...Like a recording...a loop. It says, 'Dean Winchester gives us Anna by midnight or we hurl him back to damnation." Anna says.

"Anna...Do you know any weapon that works on an angel?" Skye asks. "To what? To kill them?" Anna asks. Skye nods." Nothing we could get to...Not right now." Anna says. "Okay, wait, wait, I say we call Bobby. We get him back from hedonism." I say.

"Dean, waht's he gonna tell us that we don't already know?" Skye asks. "I don't know, but we got to think something." I say.

WOODS - NIGHT

I walk over to Anna who is standing by my Impala, studying a book on the hood. "Hey. Holding up okay?" I ask. "Trying." She sighs, looking up at me with sadness in her eyes. "Yeah." I sigh. "A little scared. I guess. So, um...Dean...I just wanted to thank you." She says.

"For what?" I ask, smiling. "Everything. You guys....you didn't have to help me..." I cut her off. "Hey, let's can the 'thanks for trying' speech, you know? Participation trophies suck ass." I chuckle. "I don't know. Maybe I don't deserve to be saved." Anna sighs.

"Don't talk like that." I say resting my left hand on her back. She scoffs. "I disobeyed. Lucifer disobeyed. It's our murder one, and I knew it. Maybe I got to pay." She sniffles. "Yeah, well, we've all done things we got to pay for." I say.

"I got to tell you something. You're not gonna like it." Anna says. 'Okay what?" I scoff. "About a week ago, I heard the angels talking...About you...What you did in hell. Dena, I know. It wasn't your fault. You should forgive yourself." She says softly.

"Anna, I don't w...want to, uh...I don't want to...I can't talk about that." I say, at a loss of words. "I know. But when you can, you have people that want to help. You are not alone. That's all I'm trying to say.." She says and kisses me."What was that for?" I ask. "You know...Our last night on earth...All that." Anna smiles. "You're stealing my best line." I chuckle as I take her to the back of the Impala.

I lay her down, kissing her passionately as we undress one another.

RUBY'S POV

I burn my hex bag, with a deep sigh. "Hello, Ruby." I hear Alastair say from behind me. I turn around and tell myself not to show any fear.

"Alastair." I say. "I have to say, I'm surprised to find you out in the open like this." He says with a smile. "Yeah? Desperate times." I say. "That they are. You looking for this?" He asks as he takes out my knife. "Your gawky human friend gave it to me." He chuckles.

"Keep it. I just want to talk." I say. "About what? About how a demon is protecting an angel? We really must revoke your membership." Alastair says while raising his left eyebrow.

"Look, I know I'm not employee of the the month, but this...I never wanted to get in the middle of this." I gasp out. "Why are you here, Ruby?" He questions. "I'll give you the angel." I blurt out without thinking. "You will? And in return?" He asks. "I walk away. Skye, The Winchester Boys and I. This angel business is none of our business to begin with." I say.

"Hmmm. You know...I'd always heard that you were a devious, cowardly little slut. You don't disappoint." He chuckles as he points at me. "So, what do you say?" I ask, with a smirk. "It's interesting...Prudent." He tilts his head a little as he thinks.

I feel hands grab me on either side and I look and its two strong demons. Fuck. "But, uh...Let me make you a...counteroffer." He licks his lips.