Jopper : You make my heart skip a beat

Chapter 22

"Do you love Hopper?" Joyce was very taken aback by El's sudden question.

"W-what. What do you mean?" Joyce stumbled weakly through the sentence, her nerves clear as day. I-I don't know what to do or say. I can't just tell her.

"Do you love Hopper?" El asked. Joyce was shocked by the boldness of question. 

What? How does she know? This can't be happening! I can't tell her I love him. What if she doesn't want me to love him? What if she isn't ok with it? What if she's happy with how things are right now? What if she's happy with just Hopper? What if she doesn't want a new mother? She does already have one, and I can't just swoop in and try take that from her. Maybe she doesn't want me to love Hopper.

"I-It's not that simple, El." Joyce said sadly. Joyce turned her back to the door. Joyce knew it wasn't that simple. Everything, as an adult, is anything but simple. It's complicated beyond how words could describe. I certainly can't explain the paranormal horror events that have taken place over the past couple years. Monsters from other dimension that want to take over the world and the people living there, is everything but simple. My love towards Hopper is not simple. It's something I can't explain to even my myself let alone the man I love's daughter. And I don't even know if his daughter wants me to be in love with him. Everything in my life is not that simple. I wish it could be, but...it's just not. And I have to accept that.

"It is simple, do you feel happy around him? Do you light up around him? Does your heart skip a beat when you think about him? That's how I feel about Mike and I love him. It can be simple...you're just overthinking it. He loves you too, you know." El told her firmly. 

She's right. She is. I do feel happy around him. He makes me happy. My whole day is brightened when he walks through the door at Melvalds. When he flashes that huge, goofy grin, he makes me smile and my heart explode with happiness. When he enters a room, or smiles at me, or whispers in my ear, my heart stops for a beat. She right. I do love him. With all my heart.

"Um... El... I-I... I do...I love him." Joyce stuttered.

Joyce asked uncertainly, still doubting the girls feeling towards her love for Hopper. "Is that ok...with you?" El smiles and rushes to hug Joyce. "Of course it's ok!" El exclaimed, not letting go. "It's more than ok. It's perfect!" She said. Joyce smiled widely as she hugged El wrapped up in her arms. I love them both.

Joyce didn't notice El look over her shoulder or her nod to someone at the door. She was only focused on her sudden happiness. I love Hopper and El said he loves me too! I have to do something. I have to! But what? What can I do?

When El finally pulled away she smile up at Joyce. "Let's find a game and go back to the boys." They both walked back to the stack of games laid out in front of them, searching once again for a good family game.

"How about cards?" El suggested, picking up the pack of cards that was originally hidden behind a box. She held it up for Joyce to see. "Perfect. Let's go." Joyce said smiling and ushered the now beaming El out the door and back to the table. Will looked up at the two woman walking in the door and smiled. "Hey! Did you find something to play?" He asked El as she sat down beside him. She set the deck of cards on the table for Will and Hopper to see. "Ooh! Cards! Let's play go fish!" Will said already starting to deal the cards.

Joyce beamed at Hopper when she sat back down and somehow their hands found their way back to each other, connecting under the table. Hopper gave her a knowing smile. He leaned towards her once again and whispered, deeply into her ear. "Looks like we don't get to be a team again." 

Joyce, suddenly feeling brave and bold, turned her head to whisper back to him. "I know. That's too bad..." They started to play with one another's fingers again. He smiled at her and looked her in the eye. His eyes glistened in the light as he made no effort to shield the love in his eyes. And just as El said, her heart skipped a beat and she couldn't stop herself from smiling back at him. I f*ing love him. Why is he so cute. 

They were broken out of their love filled gaze by Will, coughing to catch their attention. Joyce looked to the two kids opposite them, to find them smiling widely at her and Hopper. She blushed slightly and turned to face them fully, looking away from Hopper. God that's embarrassing. The kids caught us staring at each other lovingly. And El knows I love him and apparently that he loves me too. "He loves you too, you know." That's what El said. Is that true. Does he love me. Or did El just say that to get me to realise I love him. Does she not know. Or does he just not love me. But then... why does Hopper look at me like just now. What does that mean? I just need to play this game with our kids and then I can sort out my feelings about Hopper.

"Ok! So El, you can go first." Will said sliding his cards into his hands. Joyce copied her son, taking a look at her cards. El is great for Will. And she's good for him. She helps him and understands his horrible time in the Upside Down. When he has a nightmare, I always call Hopper. He comforts me and tells me everything's going to be okay. And it always is when Hopper and El show up at our house. El talks to Will and he opens up about his latest flashback. Hopper comforts me on the couch and reassured me that me and Will are safe. Nothing is going to get us. I know it won't. Not with Hopper here. He always tells me he will protect us and I trust him.

Hopper squeezed Joyce's hand gently, like he could read her thoughts. He always knows how to reassure me.

The four of them played a few games of go fish, before Joyce looked up at the ticking clock on the wall. The same one she had checked before they arrived. 11:34. Way too late for El and Will to still be up. 

"I think it's time to head to bed, you too." As soon as she said it, the two teens yawned loudly. Hopper chuckled at them. "Yeah, definitely time to sleep." Joyce giggled as the kids got up from the table and walked to Will's room, without complaints.

Hopper and Joyce just sat there for a minute, before Hopper laughed briefly and asked, "What now, Joyce?" She laughed and turned to face him. What should we do now. 

"How about a movie? I'm not really tired." She stood and leaned over the table to reach the deck of cards. Gathering them up she placed them on a side table to put back later. "Sounds great." Hopper replied, standing. They went to the couch, while talking about the games they played with the kids. While trying to get comfortable, she leaned up against Hopper, placing her head on his shoulder. God, I wish we could do this every night for the rest of our lives. I want to be with him for the rest of my life.

Halfway during their chosen movie, Joyce felt Hopper stir and tilted her head up to look into his blue eyes. "What's wrong, Hop?" She asked quietly, never looking away from his beautiful blue eyes. "Nothing's wrong, Joyce.." he chuckled and stared down into her brown eyes. 

"I just..." he stopped himself, glancing away from her eyes and glimpsing at the red of the fire. She could see its reflection in his eyes. "You just what, Hop? Is everything ok?" She was worried and he was clearly conflicted and she couldn't understand why. Is he ok? Did something happen? Is it good or bad?

He didn't answer, neither look her in the eye. She became really worried, shifting herself to face him fully. She reached up and cupped his cheek, gently pulling his face to look at her. His eyes showed his nerves. 

"I need to tell you something, Joyce."