Mallcop Stories

Shrek and Paul Blart meet at a local library. Then, things get very.... shrexy.

paul x LJ smut minion our love story retold

kinky smut. unfinished but it's going somewhere trust me

THIS IS BOOK 3 TO MY SAVIOUR:::::::::: After getting rescued by my rescuer, Rin, Y/N has begun to settle back into True Cross Academy. However, ever since her tragic b...

This is a collection of haikus and also poems but haikus y'know?

The first edition of the Blartican church bible.

forgive me mortals

A story about Veck Simms and a girl who escaped his cluthces

THIS IS BOOK 2 TO MY SAVIOUR:::: After a shocking b betrayal by her 'closest' friends, Y/n finds herself locked away in a psycward that her ex boyfriend, Rin. admitted h...

A time my friends sister stole a tee shirt at the mall

Reacting to strange facts and research to back them up

Today I got Paul Blart and Somkey (My cat.) In Mexico. Arm wearstling.

Man that eats pink donuts by and stops young boys stealing panties by day Then at night makes love to silver pole with flashing lights. Cover by ImTooHot2Die Please...

Wei Ying's has to work on his birthday this year. He doesn't really want to, but at least he has one friend that he can spend it with. It just happens that said friend i...

An A.I text generating website made this so yeah enjoy

Come read the life in Pauli's point of view in her new schewl Pollywood Blarts, it was all a mistake at first since he was singing for his brother Blina, but he gets in...

An A.I. wrote this. Thank you.

All of this was made by @dotsukiloveswalls

AN EXISTENTIAL PAUL BLART FAN SEQUEL. Months after Paul Blart's intense situation in Vegas, he's returned to the West Orange Pavillion Mall in bad shape as he's put on e...