How To Be A Heartbreaker | James Potter [COMPLETED]

Chapter Nineteen: Over My Head

Speaking started to physically hurt Sapphire. She looked like a broken toy, her eyes no longer shone with amusement and happiness, bag adorning them; her cheeks no longer blushed red from all the smiling and conversations with her friends, her skin was rather pale; her bones sticking out her entire physique more tired and thin than before because she refused to go out during lunch and dinner and see them all. To see her so-called friends living their lives with no care for her, her cousin who gave her the cold shoulder and the shiver- sending glares, and the sight that made her heart hurt and her eyes water, to see James.

But Sapphire knew she had to continue to move on, because life never stopped for anyone, even if that someone was hurting and broken beyond repair. And so she woke up each morning before everyone in her dorm, got dressed, and sneaked to the Kitchens to get a muffin before going to the Owlery or the library. She kept working in her classes, studying harder, her gaze glued to either the professor or her parchment. She practically lived in the library during and after classes, before going to the Kitchens after curfew and only going back to the dorm when she was certain no one was awake.

Alice being the only one of her 'friends', was worried for her and would bombard her with questions in the morning. But persistent as she was, she eventually gave up after the two-week mark and decided to watch with sad looks on the sidelines. Severus was a completely different deal, he disappeared. Sapphire only saw him briefly during the few classes they shared, otherwise the Slytherin was another ghost in the castle.

During her time secluded from everything she had deemed normal, Sapphire found herself writing more. Writing letters writing few worded sentences in the margins of notes, and even doodling words as artistically as she could on her own skin and in the pages of old books. She didn't know when this habit surfaced, but the purple-haired witch thought it might've had something to do with her recent exchange of letters with Luke Lamens.

He hadn't responded to her letter and Sapphire didn't pay him much mind, she had enough on her plate as it was She noticed her grades picking up by a lot she noticed the way Slughorn beamed at her in class and knew it was only eventual until he asked her to join the horrifically named Slug Club, as he had with Alice and Lily, she noticed how Remus had a fresh scar on his cheek in Arithmancy, she noticed how the rest of the Marauders sported gashes and cuts too she noticed that Lily started styling her hair differently, she noticed lames was holding a novel In Transfiguration.

Sapphire felt like one of those disguised as people in the background of paintings there to watch everything and take notes instead of getting in on the action. She wanted to get out of the grey spot she was in so bad. to become the person she used to be before her heart was stomped upon, but she was stuck. Her feet were glued to the hurt zone she had built herself and was unable to move.

Sometimes, although her heart ached at the thought and guilt consumed her, she wondered if it would've been better had she fought harder to stay at Beauxbatons. She wondered if it would hurt less to have Luke break her heart than have it be James. She wondered if it would've hurt less had she stayed oblivious to Luke's cheating and stayed with the friends who had proved to her before that they wouldn't give up on her over a boy.

And maybe it would have been better.

Sapphire sat down on her bed as Alice walked from the dresser to the bathroom humming a Beatles song. The purple-haired witch sat with her arms over her chest and her gaze to the floor watching her converse- clad feet tap against the floor. Alice placed a few dresses next to Sapphire, along with shoes and masks.

"You should've come with us to Hogsmeade last weekend to shop for the Carter twin's birthday party," Alice said. handing her a sleeveless, long beige dress. "At least it's a masquerade ball so it doesn't matter what dress you wear if it matches the mask."