How To Be A Heartbreaker | James Potter [COMPLETED]

Chapter Sixteen: Letters For You

Seething was not the correct adjective to describe how mad Sapphire felt. More than anything she was sad and frustrated, but her anger was blotching her sight with violent red. Her fingers were shaking as she reached into her bag. She spent twenty minutes trying to calm herself down and convince herself to read Luke's letter. Every time she thought about him, her heart clenched. Luke wasn't like James. Luke was the first everything to her first boyfriend, first love, first kiss, and so much more. He was the excitement about doing something for the first time and knowing you'll love it. Then there was James, a game in which feelings were off-limits and it ended up the exact opposite.

Not knowing whether or not she should read the letters, Sapphire kept the edges of her fingers on the letter. They tingled, sending sparks of electricity through her body as thoughts roamed around in her head. Sapphire furrowed her eyebrows, she didn't have feelings for Luke, that was the only thing she was sure of. yet her stomach flipped knowing that he was still sending her letters. As much as she hated admitting it she liked the attention, she liked knowing she affected the French boy, and it disgusted her.

Fluttering her eyelids closed, an image of James popped up in her mind. It was James, holding his broomstick in one hand and the other holding Sapphire's as he attempted to get her outside during a free period and teach her Quidditch Beaming down at her, brown hair just the right amount of messy that her fingers loved to weave through a small blush on his already flushed cheeks and nose, and sparkling hazel eyes, all waiting for her.

Thinking of him felt someone settling a sharp knife through Sapphire's heart and the wound only became larger as she thought of Lily. Amidst all of the anger, insecurity hid behind her walls. She wasn't like Lily, she wasn't pretty and smart and nice. Sapphire was mean, wild, and untameable. She didn't have the history Lily and James had; she would never. A cynical piece of her mind, hell-bent on making her more miserable, thought of James as Lily's Luke and vice versa, making her nose scrunch up and eyes squeeze tight.

Sapphire's eye switched to her watch, groaning as she had less than half an hour until she met with Severus at the Black Lake. Making up her mind, she quickly snatched the letter, and with hands shaking like a leaf opened the envelope forgetting about carefulness. Parchment came out, no visible Ink patterns, and a bunch of photographs. Letting out a release of breath, she opened the folded up letter.

Sapphire,

I already sent you so many letters and I didn't get replies. I won't be surprised if this is another letter you throw in the garbage if you even bother taking them if they even get to you. The first time, I was heartbroken but I was still hopeful. Maybe the letter didn't get to you; the owl could have dropped or it could have been lost in other stacks of mail. The second one I didn't give up. I didn't think you would ever ignore me like that. I didn't think you'd ever dismiss me as if I didn't matter to you. Hey, maybe she's writing to me and her letters are getting lost, as well. By the fourth letter, I had lost all hope. Am I really not that important to you that you couldn't pick up a quill and write to me?

Merlin, Sapphire, just a letter with your name on it telling me you were okay and alive would have sufficed. Anything to stop my going insane not knowing if you're fine. But no. My significance is not great enough for you to care And, you know, that I was okay with. You didn't care for me, you didn't love me, anymore. What really irked me and hurt me more than you can imagine is why the bloody hell did you just let go without saying goodbye.

I have no idea what happened. One day you were there and the next you disappeared. One day we were together and the next we weren't. I have so many questions. Why- why did you just leave me like that, without uttering a word? What-what did I do to make you cold-hearted towards me? I thought we had something special.