Severus Snape A Soul Undiminished

Chapter 51 - Transgression

Sirana was growing more worried for Severus. She'd started reading the newspaper every chance she got. Things were looking grim. She wished that Hogwarts could remain
untouched by all of that. It was a wonderful place. She could tell Severus tried to leave his worries at the door, but she could see his stress. Classes went better once Draco decided he didn't have much choice except to play nicely. She could even see changes in Draco, as if he'd aged with worry.
She received notice that Albus wanted to speak with her as soon as she received the message. She felt like she'd swallowed a stone and her stomach ached with worry. She enjoyed seeing Albus, but she couldn't shake the bad feeling.
When she arrived, he was standing, waiting for her in his office. "Sirana, I'm sorry. I have some bad news. I wish I could give you more notice, but your grandfather needs you. I can't tell you much more, because time is pressing. Please, can you leave now? Don't worry, I will let Severus know where you've gone." Albus's tone was gravely serious.
"Yes, of course. I'm ready when you are," she answered, knowing he wouldn't ask if the situation didn't require it.
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He offered her his arm and they Disapparated from Hogwarts. The first thing she noticed was that Apparating with Albus felt completely different than with Severus, and she staggered a little when they arrived. Her grandfather approached them immediately, looking a little panicked.
"Thank you for coming so soon. I really didn't expect for you to arrive in time. Sirana, I'm so sorry. I didn't want to bring you in to this, but Albus thought you would be our best option."
"Of course, grandfather. You know I would do anything for you," Sirana replied earnestly.
"Come,now,"Albus said hurriedly."We must go immediately."
Her grandfather grabbed his satchel, they both grabbed Albus's arm, and they Disapparated.
They were in London. She recognized it from when she'd visited as a child. Albus said his goodbyes to them, assuring her that her grandfather would fill her in with the details. They were outside of a large line of brick buildings, and she followed her grandfather inside up the stairs to the third floor. There was a small, dark apartment and he hurriedly ushered her in. He drew his wand and set protective spells before he collapsed in a chair.
"This will do us for now. We will have to keep on the move. The Order of the Phoenix is being watched, and they've found out that I've returned. I was hoping they'd forgotten about me since it's been so long, thinking I was dead, but there are members of the Dark Lord's rank who still have a vendetta against me," He explained. "I wouldn't have brought you into this; in fact, Albus and I still do not see eye to eye on it. You see, I never really
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left the Order, although I've been very careful over the years to remain under the radar. It has helped me get more accomplished being closer to the Ministry since my return, but I can no longer operate alone. The Ministry is a major target, and it is becoming increasingly difficult to protect members of the Order from harm."
Sirana was surprised. Her grandfather had never hinted at this, which may be why he was able get by so long being undercover.
"What are you saying, grandfather? Am I here to care for you, protect you, or to work with you?" Sirana asked.
Her grandfather finally smiled, looking more like himself. "My dear, it looks like we are going to be comrades-in-arms," he stood, placing a hand on her shoulder. "That's if you are willing. Albus had assured me you are more than able—and I have no doubt he is right."
Sirana placed her arm on his shoulder as well. "I am willing, and ready."She'd just wished she'd gotten a chance to say goodbye to Severus.
Severus had been summoned to Albus's office as well. He had hoped to get home early to spend time with Sirana, as they'd both been so busy lately, but he knew she would understand. He'd planned on breaking out a bottle of elf-made wine, as he knew that always put her in a pleasant mood. Albus's mood however seemed somber.
"Severus, thank you for coming. I'm afraid I have some news that you may find displeasing. Here, please have a seat and I will pour us a drink."
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Severus remained standing. "If it is bad news, I think I'd prefer to hear it standing."
"As you wish, Severus," Albus said, pouring himself a drink. He sat in his chair, then continued, "Sirana has left to be with her grandfather. I don't think I need to tell you that the circumstances were dire. Her grandfather needed assistance, and Sirana was the best choice for the job."
Severus couldn't stand to look at him this moment and walked angrily to the other side of the room.
"Severus," he heard Albus say gently. "It was necessary. She isn't as fragile as you might think. I would not have asked her if I hadn't believed she was ready."
Severus finally turned and walked back towards Albus, his voice sounding anguished. "You didn't ask me, or tell me, or even give me the chance to see her before she left."
"I'm sorry, Severus. There was no time. I had just received word. I couldn't even give her notice to pack," Albus said regretfully. "I told her that I would inform you. I knew you would be angry with me, but there was no other choice I could make."
Severus finally sat, leaning over to put his head in his hands. Albus came over and put a hand on Severus's shoulder. "I know that you care deeply for her, but I cannot spare her for the severity of our plight. She is stronger than you might think. She will not fail."
Severus stood to face Dumbledore. "I know how strong she is. I have seen her strength, with my own eyes and mind. I have
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no doubt of her abilities or her commitment. I cannot help but think you are throwing her to the wolves. If anything happens to her...I don't know if I could...live with myself."
"Or forgive me?" Albus added.
Severus walked to Albus's desk, bending to place his hands on it. "Why must the price always be so high, Albus? I would not place the blame on you, as I have said myself that holding her back would be unjust. I will place my confidence in her, as she has in me—and also in you," Severus said dejectedly, standing to face him once more.
"Thank you, Severus. I realize that I have asked more of you than is equitable, and I would not do so if I thought you were incapable. I do believe, however, that the time will come before the end when our sacrifices prove their worth," Albus said, offering a glimpse of hope that the outcome may still be worth their efforts.
He knew that Albus's own sacrifices were given without wavering, and he felt some shame for his own hesitation. "Please, Albus, it is I who must ask for forgiveness. I would ask that you keep me informed of her well-being," Severus replied.
Albus placed his hand on Severus's arm, saying gently, "Forgiveness is not needed where there is no transgression. And I will be sure to keep you informed. Also, it isn't for forever. She wanted me to tell you that."