I just heard you found the one you've been looking
I wish I would have known that wasn't me
'Cause even after all this time I still wonder
Why I can't move on, just the way you did so easily
This story is all about Jeon Jungkook of Bangtan and Lalis...
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Call me stupid, obsessed or martyr but what should I do? I love him. I almost swallowed all my parent's harsh words but I think I am already numb and emotionless.
You almost left your account emptied. What the hell are you planning?
I chuckled hearing my Mom's word when she discovered my unexpected withdrawals in my private bank account.
Just don't go home crying again because you were scammed for the second time.
They almost freaked out and take the first flight from Bangkok to Seoul when they got an email from the bank luckily they called me first before they did that. Or else I am gonna suffered hearing all their rants in person.
Lalisa Manoban, you've grown up and we don't think you still need us your parents in your life but please let us know what's your plan first. We saw the most painful tears from you when your Manager Oppa lied to you and we don't want to see that Lalisa again. Please, Honey, think wisely, your smart but your soft personality always betrayed you as a person. If you want to share something don't hesitate to come home. Our house's door is always open for you. We love you!
I dropped the phone call when my Dad started to talk to me through his heart and I am not going to lie because that's really my weakness. My Dad always has the soft spot in my heart, he's not my real but he stood up like his own blood running from my veins. He loves me like his own and I love him like my own.
"What's wrong Ms. Doll?" Hal-abeoji asked me.
I laughed softly when I didn't notice the tears that keep on running into my cheeks.
I wipe it out and look at him straight, "It's my Parents Hal-abeoji, I just missed them." I lied. I don't want him to know that I struggled and spent a lot to save this place. To save him, his memories but honestly I did this and I come up with this decision because I am not worried for him but afraid to lose my last good memories with the man who shows me what love is and how it is painful.
He nodded at me and smile, "Do you need anything else Ms.?" He asked me again and I shook my head saying No to him.
"You may take your rest now Hal-abeoji, I am okay here." He nodded and let me stay alone in the resthouse.
I roamed my eyes again in this dark room that we decorated with all of JK and I's pictures together.
The warm inside was still inside me, and I don't think it will vanish that easily like the way he did.
I am not saying that he really forget me that easily actually I am happy for him, but there is still pinched in me saying and questioning myself did I really made a right decision in letting him go. Because watching him happy and contented without me is something that hurts my eyes to see.
Jennie Unnie was right. First love is hard to forget, well he is my first love and I don't think I am was his first too. I have to understand this harsh world or else it will ruin my whole being.
